Feel like a rubbish mum

[Mummyof2babiesx]

Hey, coming on to rant really…
I have a 2 year old and an 11 week old, who I love to the moon and back! But I feel like a really crap mum at the moment..
I have no time to play with my toddler, I’m home alone with them most of the time, and things seem to take over! If I get any spare time I do try, but then the baby cries and needs me so I have to leave the playing :(
I feel like sometimes I tell my toddler off too quickly, usually cause I’m up to my eyes… I don’t scream and shout but I do raise my voice sometimes!
My house always seems messy too at the minute no matter what I do!
Arghhhh, just feel like I’m being really crap at the moment :(

I will add though. I do do other things like let the toddler help me cook, and we dance and go for walks etc.. it’s just the playing I can’t seem to fit in, which is all I’m ever asked to do

Please be kind to yourself you have 2 under 2 that's quite a handful. How old was ur eldest when you had the youngest?

It seems like you're doing everything u possibly can so please be kind to yourself. Can grandparents or partner help? If not that's okay. How about get him things he can do independently like colouring pencils and colouring books or crayons?

A messy house is a fun house. Do not ever apologise for that. Your house doesn't need to look perfect. It's how you make your kids enjoy life.

Pretty soon they'll be old enough to play with each other. I have a 4 year old and a 9 month baby and they happily entertain each other since dd was about 4-5 months

Exactly the same situation here. A friend advised I give the 2 year old fifteen minutes undivided attention doing whatever she wants to do together and is has helped - is that something you can commit to when the baby's napping/with your partner?

Thanks! I just feel like the worst mum in the world sometimes!
So my eldest is 2.5, so just over 2 when I had my baby!

Same here! 22 month old and five month old! You are doing well if they are dressed and fed and the house isn’t burned down 😂 it’s so hard isn’t it!

@faithfulbird20

It seems like you're doing everything u possibly can so please be kind to yourself. Can grandparents or partner help? If not that's okay. How about get him things he can do independently like colouring pencils and colouring books or crayons?

A messy house is a fun house. Do not ever apologise for that. Your house doesn't need to look perfect. It's how you make your kids enjoy life.

My husband helps when he is at home, he’s very good but works 7 days a week! My toddler idolises him, so when he’s home he is all over him, then I use that time to cook and clean and get the bedrooms ready for the night time! I’ve tried with colouring etc, I have lots of crafts but it’s not interesting to them, my toddler is more into role playing!!

Thank you for taking the time to reply! Xx

@DuchessSilver

Exactly the same situation here. A friend advised I give the 2 year old fifteen minutes undivided attention doing whatever she wants to do together and is has helped - is that something you can commit to when the baby's napping/with your partner?

This sounds good, I might try this… see we used to have a bath together every evening without fail, but that’s not happening anymore as both need bathing!! It’s just hard to juggle the two isn’t it!

My toddler was like this, she is 3 now and much more into crafts/ colouring/ puzzles etc, but when she loved imaginative play only I would set up scenarios with her teddies - like teddies are having a picnic, teddies are at the dentist etc - then participate from the sofa/ kitchen - oh does Maisy want some more tea/ oh bernard has a headache what can we do for him etc. It bought me 10/15 minutes many times, just mentioning in case it is useful!

Do you have toddler groups you could go to? These were my life savers. Got me out of the house, toddler played with all the stuff and I sat holding the baby. Other people there to help and they get a snack! If you are out you aren't making the house messy either!

It's a really tricky stage but in the blink of an eye it'll be gone (I know it doesn't feel like that at the moment).

Thanks for all of your suggestions… I’ll deffo look into some toddler groups! It’s been a bit easier this weekend! And the baby is going down on her own to sleep, so I’m not having to sit and hold her! Fingers crossed