I need advice on my 5 year old son. He is on the waiting list for ASD assessment but we are at least 7 months away. In the last 4 weeks his behaviour has escalated rapidly. He is very bright (reading level 7, early talker), although he had outbursts in school they are now almost daily and much more severe. In the last 2 weeks he has bitten, scratched and pinched other children. He scratched, spat at and threw things at teachers, all of this happens when he is asked to do things that do not align with what he wants. They have given him techniques such as breathing exercises, chew toys, wall pushing but he will not engage in them when he is angry and his anger happens so quickly.
He is a daddies boy, I come down about 10 minutes after everyone in the morning. This can trigger him screaming MAKE HER GO AWAY, I DON'T WANT MUMMY DOWN HERE. MAKE HE LEAVE. WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO BE HERE!! When his DH got him to calm down and apologise to me, I gave him a hug and said it made me feel sad when he said that, he immediately turned on me again screaming DON'T YOU TALK ABOUT IT. He has drawn blood by scratching and clawing my hands when I have had to physically remove him from trying to kick over plant pots in public (he wanted to go into a room where a film was being shown but didn't want it to be dark, his screaming was disturbing the other customers). 4 weeks ago this would have been an isolated occurrence, it is now multiple times a day. At the weekend we had to leave his nans when he wanted to watch something on TV, in the back of the car he was frothing at the mouth, clawing and kicking at the seats, his younger brother was terrified and hysterically crying, saying he was scared which made him more angry. We couldn't stop because we were on a motorway.
He postures like a drunken man, coming inches from your face, scowling and growling - it would be funny if there wasn't so much genuine aggression in it. I just don't know what to do. He can be the sweetest, most engaging little boy. He is popular in school and charms everyone we meet but this anger is happening so frequently it is becoming the norm. Although the school tells us we are doing everything well and they can handle it I just don't see where it is going to end at the moment. I am scared, worried, very hurt and don't know where to turn. Had anyone been in a similar position and give us any advice?