AIBU not to attend kids party

[tilly2019]

Hi, just some advice please!

It's my godsons 4th bday party this weekend at a big soft play centre. Our daughter (20 months) has been invited. I'm 31 weeks pregnant with twins and the size of a house! It's been a very difficult pregnancy, with risks the twins were going to be delivered at 28 weeks due to them being very small. We are still being very closely monitored.

My question is: am I being unreasonable not to attend the party? Drs have said to be careful about Covid in this last trimester, it can bring on early labour and obviously the twins are very small at the moment (under the 5th centile).

I'm worried about being a terrible friend, a let down or seeming OTT.

But we've had a scary pregnancy so far, this new Omicron variant is spreading, this party is just days after masks etc are all mandatory again, and I simply cannot stop my 20 months touching all the balls in the ball pit etc! (She's also a thumb sucker so always touches things then puts hands in mouth).

Last time we did soft play (a month or so ago) she picked up a cold. I have purposely avoided booking soft plays / enclosed areas for the next few final weeks of my pregnancy.

Honest opinions? I understand I might be being a bit OTT!

Not unreasonable at all, even without the pregnancy, twins and COVID! Just say the same as you have here to your friend, drop round a lovely present and put your feet up.

Not at all. Stay home! Softplays are germ factories.

Yanbu. Stay home!

31 weeks pregnant with twins, being carefully monitored... not unreasonable even without Covid risks. Any proper friend will understand that.

Yanbu
Completely understandable in your circumstances.

You would be unreasonable to GO.

Are you vaccinated? My friend is heavily pregnant with twins and unvaccinated, and statistically it’s pregnant unvaccinated women in ICU according to my doctor friend.

I'm very much on the side of trying to be as normal as possible, but even I would advise you stay at home. Kids parties are hell anyway!

I'm pretty relaxed about covid (but don't break any rules before anyone jumps up and down). We are doing a soft play party for my dd soon too.

I think you're being completely reasonable not to want to go! I wouldn't mind in the least anyone cancelling for that reason or any reason as long as we get some notice.

I actually don't think I'd go if I were you either BTW. Can your oh take your dd maybe, or is that no good as he would then be exposed?

Surely no one would expect you to go, even without covid. She probably invited you so you didn't feel left out, or on autopilot if she's busy. Just tell her you're very sorry but you can't as you've been told to be careful about mixing.

If she gets huffy, the problem isn't with you!

Whenever there is a shall I covid question I normally think just go. In this case I think you are perfectly justified. The four year old won't care and parties are just about them having fun.

My child’s god mother would either be saying…

I’ll collect and bring back DD so you can chill out at home

Or

If you’re worried about covid, please feel under no pressure whatsoever to come

And I’d do exactly the same for her

Thank you so much everyone, I would hate to be a bad friend and godmother by not going, but everyone has made me feel better about deciding not to go. I just needed that outside opinion as I was really confused about what to do!

I feel better now about being on the safe side and declining, we're hoping to drop his pressie off today or tomorrow instead ready for his birthday next week x