Anyone else rubbish at being home with toddler?

[Needaholidayplease]

I work part time and I love doing stuff with my toddler. But I know that we can't be 'doing' stuff the whole time, he'd be knackered. I struggle with afternoons at home with him- he entertains himself a bit and we can do bits and pieces together but his concentration isn't great. I always end feel like a bit of a rubbish mum because the day drags so much/ I feel antsy and get a bit down.
Is anyone else rubbish at staying home? I guess the answer would be to work more, but I really do enjoy going out with my son and being there for him. I just don't like being at home!

I am exactly the same! I break the day up by doing an activity in the morn and afternoon. Some days this is soft play for example but most of the time is a walk in morn and supermarket for bits n bobs in pm. Makes the day go much quicker being out the house twice a day and means when we're at home, the quality of play is better as he isn't bored.

I literally spend all day getting out of the house, no more than an hour in at once unless it’s a nap or lunch. Even if it’s out to the shop or post office or petrol station. It is exhausting but being inside would be worse!

As pp I try to go out am and pm.
Morning is always an activity for him, park, feed ducks, soft play etc.
Afternoon, as pp we do shops, even just out for a walk, scooter etc. An hours fresh air makes a lot of difference in how our afternoons are.

That's a good idea. Unfortunately my kid is going through a stage of not wanting to put on clothes/ shoes/ leave the house, so once is usually all we can manage! I find it really hard, my job is very full on (or used to be before COVID and wfh) and I'm just really not used to being at home with not a whole lot to do, other than build dens etc. It's a big adjustment (still!)

I've always struggled with this too. I find we can do so many activities but due to short toddler attention spans I feel like the day drags!

I agree with trips out to break the day up. But I find that harder now it's wet and cold out.

I find rotating toys helps. So put some away in a box in the loft/shed/garage and then bring them out every so often.

Save bits of recycling like egg boxes, cereal boxes and just doing thing like scribbling on them, cutting them up, using them as a makeshift house/car for little figures is a cheap easy game.

Also I find doing a bath in the middle of the afternoon helps break up the day. So rather than before bed, do a bath at 3/4pm. They enjoy playing and it breaks up the afternoon!

But you're not alone for sure!

I had a realisation the other day that I can be in the same room as my toddler but that I don't have to actively engage the whole time. He's perfectly happy playing with his Lego / trains / cars and I can sit on the sofa and read a book and keep an eye on him. Obviously if he wants me to play, I'll play but I think it's good for him to play by himself sometimes too.

I learnt a lot by watching my mum - a primary school teacher, and then in turn my husband watched me. What works for us is that I draw pictures while my son tells me what to draw for example - doesn't absolutely fry my brain and he still gets to 'colour in'. He spends a lot of time in his highchair or pen while we keep his brain and hands engaged - otherwise the power of the wriggle would get in the way completely.

I just strap him (them, there’s two of them) down in the pram and go out.

Walked a mile passing 2 closer shops just to get recycling bags last week 😃. Took ages, up a massive hill, also bought him (older one) a carton of apple juice which he thought was incredible.. 39p and we were out for ages.

I hear you and following. I have a bad back at the moment and can’t get the kids out in the car or walk far and am going INSANE

Baking is a big favourite with my 2yo atm, and that takes up a nice chunk of time. Messy as heck, but I figure it's worth it to keep him occupied and interested. He's really not good at all at playing with toys by himself - I wish he would happily build his train tracks but maybe that will come.

We cannot stay inside, we go out anytime between 9-12 and then we’re out till tea time at the earliest, even if we just walk round shops and parks all day, he just about manages a few hrs at home in the morning / evening.

How old is your toddler OP?

Not only toddler age- my entire parenting style is firmly centred around getting out of the damn house and letting off steam, and my DC are 6 and 11. Staying in all day generally spells doom. And now we’re self isolating and can’t get out for 10 days…thoughts and prayers 😱

Yep .My three are adults now but I always went out with them every day, Absolutely couldn’t stand staying at home. We went to parks and I was lucky to have a huge group off friends who all had babies at the time …was always happy to have toddlers round for tea with their mums because they were friends.

@LapinR0se

How old is your toddler OP?

Just turned 3 so almost getting out of toddlerhood. But have always been shit at being home!

I went out on my days off with my little one, sometimes it was stuff for me like the out of town shopping centre but a day at home can drag without a little one so you need activities.

Another one who just goes out! Every morning, home for lunch and nap, and out every afternoon. Then she watches a little bit of TV in the evening and sometimes the morning, probably 2x half hour sessions which I think is fine. I'm a much better mum out and about, I'd way rather be walking on walls and poking things with sticks than playing with toys at home. That really gets me down. The only downside is that I do spend too much on coffee out and about, and if it's a rainy day we often end up at our local shopping centre and inevitably I spend money there too!

Am I the only one who likes being at home with a toddler? We go out most days but sometimes we just hang out at home doing not very much!

My DD went through a stage of not wanting to get togged up and go out again in the afternoon, but she was ok when we got into a routine of going out for her afternoon snack. After lunch we try to do some active play indoors (like throwing beanbags at cushions, playing stepping stone, balloon volleyball (interior design permitting)) then its into the pushchair for a walk with a snack for her (1 yr old Ds in the back carrier) & a coffee in a takeout cup and a podcast for me - good to have some adult “company” and something interesting to think about to break up the afternoon, and she likes the rest!

I'm only at home with my toddler in the middle of the day for lunch and a (short) nap, but even that's in the buggy because she won't nap in the cot any more.

I really struggle being in the house with her for any length of time, so we have a trip out even if it's just to the library and a coffee shop. It's a combination of both our temperaments I think - I feel better getting out and she's easier to manage.

I’m out morning and afternoon with 18 mo DS on my days off. Morning is usually something bigger like soft play or swimming or toddler group. Afternoon is local park or coffee shop or library. I like being out and he’s a nightmare inside for > 1 hour, so it suits us pretty well. I hope he starts tolerating a bit more independent play in the house as he gets older, but I’m not hopeful 😬

Wow, this is a revelation. I always thought it was just me who was like this!

Haha oh good, very pleased it's not just me. I feel guilty, but remember I was never great at having days off on my own before I had a kid. And even then, I could just watch Netflix and scroll on my phone. Now I'm not even allowed to do that (apart from the scrolling above his head)

Im horrendous at staying in the house and its a complete battle getting him dressed and out but totally worth it. I can count on one hand (excluding covid and isolation which was absolute torture) how many times we have had a day in and he is 3 in april. We usually arrange to go out around 11, have lunch somewhere and get back for his nap 2-4. By this time his dads not long til he gets home and it's bearable! Sometimes ill arrange for tea with a friend and their baby just to pass time til bed routine!

@FTEngineerM

I just strap him (them, there’s two of them) down in the pram and go out.

Walked a mile passing 2 closer shops just to get recycling bags last week 😃. Took ages, up a massive hill, also bought him (older one) a carton of apple juice which he thought was incredible.. 39p and we were out for ages.

This really made me chuckle.

I sometimes take mine to parks that are a good 45minutes plus away in the car and count the extra time killed as a win.

Ditto with supermarkets, I do like a trip to a different shop far away just for a change of scene.