3/4yo crying for a long time

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Whenever my daughter cries she'll cry/be loud for a really long time for example, today she tripped and hurt her knee. I stopped immediately gave her a big long hug, kissed, .... the works. Then we resumed walking and she kept on crying loud, just making a lot of noise. For like 10 minutes!!!! It was not a horrible fall, it was just a small trip up, scrapped knee (not even scrapped because she was wearing joggers that showed no sign of damage)

What can I do?........ tbh it's very annoying and it gives me an headache and I start losing my patience a little bit....

Ignore the noise. And try to distract her, perhaps suggest a silly song you can both sing. The she and to use her voice for that instead of the annoying noise.

10 minutes is not long
Put your headphones on snd ignore

Also...try bit to give her huge amounts of attention for hurting herself in the first place.

A cheerful "oopsie daisy, up you get!" Would have surely been enough for a small trip?

If she's genuinely hurt herself then of course kisses and cuddles etc, once it's become apparent that there's actually something wrong.

But a small trip/stumble/bop etc doesn't need long hugs, kisses etc.

Less fuss!

Less fuss. The more fuss you make the more she thinks it is a terrible injury. If she falls over and there's no blood or anything you can just say, oops that's a surprise! Up you get! Or if the lip starts wobbling distract. Ooh I can see a cool rock over there. Let's check it out!

@00100001

Also...try bit to give her huge amounts of attention for hurting herself in the first place.

A cheerful "oopsie daisy, up you get!" Would have surely been enough for a small trip?

It was more like a small "splat"! Hence the cub licking. She didn't complain of her hands or anything else, just her knee

@00100001

Ignore the noise. And try to distract her, perhaps suggest a silly song you can both sing. The she and to use her voice for that instead of the annoying noise.

I did try distracting her, pointing at things in the street, singing a funny song....

She gets into her loud mode and that's it. She does this for everything. Sometimes I don't even know why she's crying in the first place 🤷🏻‍♀️

I think it's a metaphoric (and real....) cry for attention.... but I'm at a loss.... not even turning on the TV helps when she's being like that

Just keep cuddling her. It’s not about the knee. She likes the attention so give it to her…not because you’re making a fuss about her knee if one isn’t needed, but just because she’s going through a clingy phase and wants a cuddle. She won’t turn into a needy adult because her mum is affectionate to her when she’s 4 - I worried about that when mine were being clingy but I needn’t have.

@Coronawireless you may have a point, she's become the middle child and not taking it too well.... also I wish I could say I have everything under control....... our living situation is not fantastic

[quote grey12]@Coronawireless you may have a point, she's become the middle child and not taking it too well.... also I wish I could say I have everything under control....... our living situation is not fantastic[/quote]
It sounds tough and you’re probably time-short and under stress. She’s probably picking up on that. The whinging is very wearing. I can only promise you that you’ll never regret cuddling her as much as she wants…a firm Not Right Now! of course if she’s truly taking the piss…but ten cuddles later for every Not Now. I truly believe some hard graft time-wise put in now will head off at least some of the teenage issues later💐

I remember anytime I fell my parents would off followed with omg look at the hole you made in the ground always made me laugh.

10 minutes definitely feels like an age when a child is wailing loudly in your ear.

I go by the validating feelings technique, it does seem to help. You go "Oh that's a very sad noise!" or "Your knee REALLY hurts." This is after an initial matter-of-fact response. If you go all in with concern and sympathy immediately then it can frighten them into thinking something is really wrong, so I start out with whoops-a-daisy/brush off etc and offer cuddles, it's only if they are really displaying a sad response themselves that I'd break out the "Oh that's really upset you today" or "It scared you when you fell over" kind of reflecting.

Be warned that it usually results in an upswing of noise/upset initially as they kind of lean in to your suggestion, but then after that it's like they've processed it and they usually calm down very quickly or they convert their wailing into words and they can talk about it, which is much more pleasant to the ear!

@Babyghirl

I remember anytime I fell my parents would off followed with omg look at the hole you made in the ground always made me laugh.

That's a good one!!

When did sibling arrive?

@00100001 little sister is 1yo. But though she hasn't shown many signs of jealousy, she had to grow up quicker than she expected and she is pushing back on that.... sometimes she pretends she can't take her clothes off or put them on for example

I’d say it’s definitely sibling rivalry, my DD is the same. She was a single child until age 4 and hated the attention being on DS. Even now after 2 1/2 years she’ll try to get attention over him wherever possible.