How to play with toddler and newborn

[StormInAGinGlass]

I've had a look at so many old threads about coping with a newborn and toddler but I would really appreciate some advice on how to make sure the eldest gets some attention and time when I have a newborn basically on me 24/7.

I will try and get DH to have LO for a couple of hours on a weekend so I can have some one on one time with 3yr old DD but for days in the week when it's just us, how do you do it?

I also feel guilty for newborn but have time at night once DD is in bed or the days she is in preschool

Hello

So my days look like this

Morning, a toddler based activity, walk, park, soft play, meet friends etc, baby just comes along.

Then lunch.

Then baby has nap, toddler and I make tea, then she has half hour telly while I do some housework, then we do something like painting or jigsaws or dangerous toys as she calls them, ie things baby would eat like duplo.

Then baby is up, fed and we go for another walk about 330 again baby just in pram watching world go by.

Tea, bath both together, baby fed and bed, toddler half hour play or stories of their choosing.

Newborn doesn't need played with. They can just fall in with whatever you do for the 3 yr old who does need interaction and activities. By the time I got to my 3rd and 4th child I finally realised, everything is interaction and stimulation for a newborn and they can be very flexible just sleeping whenever wherever. Focus on the toddler and just make sure baby is fed and cuddled.

Stick newborn on chest in sling. Chase toddler. Repeat.

Does the guilt subside? I really feel like I've ruined DD's life, she's by no means spoilt and can be quite independent but I miss spending the time with her and she is so different. I feel awful because I'm also worried about not having enough time to fuss over new DS

Your 3yr old is at the age now where she is starting to become more independent. And along with that you've given her a sibling for life. You e nothing to feel guilty about. You're still there, she's safe and loved. That's already a heel of an advantage over many many children. See a year from now you'll see she has her own life starting so what I'm clumsily trying to say is that we are not the whole world for our kids as they emerge from baby stage. And that's wonderful. But you are not responsible for giving her everything she wants in the way she wants it. You are simply responsible for keeping her safe and loved, and teaching her how to cope and adjust to normal life events, not protect her from them.

I have a newborn and 3yo. Still trying to figure it out as well! Luckily he loves his little sister and finds her fascinating.

The 3yo is in nursery during the week, but when I have them together, the newborn just lives in the sling (or on the play gym/mat if she is in the mood). They really don't need that much interaction, just watching their older sibling play and hearing you talk is tonnes of stimulation.

I have a 2.5 year old and a 3 week old. I’m still trying to figure it out but I think the best thing really is to focus on the toddler, newborns don’t really need much other than milk and clean nappies so they can happily go in the sling while you manage the older one.
My hope is to get the toddler out of the house as much as possible for play dates, toddler groups or walks/the park, etc. I’m finding it hard to get out and about with both of them but hoping that gets easier over time.