23 month age gap anyone?

[sunsandwaves]

Hi all, I have just found out I'm pregnant again. My son is 14 months so will be 23 months old when new baby is here. I'm panicking soooo much now I'll cope. Has anyone else got this age gap and how was it ? Many thanks

Amazing! Old enough to understand what’s happening and young enough to never remember life without their sibling. Mine are 2 and 4 now and best friends. They like the same programmes, toys, classes, days out etc. Congratulations!

My gap is 22 months, they're 8 & 10 now. It was quite difficult at first as you have a baby and a very young toddler so both pretty demanding on your time, however, the 'difficult' stage passes quickly and then they grow up together. As they're close in age things like activities/days out etc work pretty well and they both liked similar things.

If I had my time again, I'd go with a similar gap, it worked really well for us.

Just a bit smaller, I currently have a 4 year old, a 21 month old and a 3 week old. Absolutely lovely so far. It's not easy but it's easier than I expected - there's a few things I'm still trying to work out though (I can't seem to get them to nap at the same time unless they're both in the pram! 🤔)

Getting out and about is much better than I thought it would be, during the week my eldest goes to school and I take the two little ones to toddler groups. Then on the weekend DH is about and we can manage bigger days out which has been great so far.

Congratulations and good luck to you, OP! 💕

Congratulations!!
My age gaps were 19 months and then 21 months - 3 under 4 years old and honestly they were the best of times. I was a SAHM because of lack of child care so we were poor in terms of money but I loved it to bits.
Don’t worry, roll with it and you will be fine. 💐

Yes, it's brilliant! The first six months were tough, but the eldest can't remember a time without the youngest so he soon adjusted. They are so so close, able to play together since very early and now age 5&7 they both say the other is their best friend. It's a lovely age gap.

24 months here, (3 days between birthdays) all good so far they are 11&13 now and both at high school !..glad we didnt wait long in between.

21 months between mine. They are now 10 and 12 and I wouldn't change it. Its way easier having two together at the baby/toddler stage than to get past that and then start all over again.
And doing age appropriate days out/holidays etc is easier when they are close in age.
Don't get me wrong, they do fight sometimes but there's definitely more pros than cons to a closer gap imo

24 months and 10 days between mine. I was due on the same day!

Not going to lie, I don't really remember the first 6 months.

What I do remember helped was;

Breastfeeding - so much easier than faffing with bottles (I combi fed my first before anyone says anything)
Routine - from day one keeping up the toddlers routine and the baby settled into that rhythm quite well
Getting up and out - with number 1 I'd stay in bed all morning, couldn't do that with 2 so I'd get up early, get dressed and get them both out ASAP
Kept eldest in nursery - a day with just one was a proper break
DH did everything toddler related when home
Didn't push potty training for number 1 - soooo many people told me to train him before baby came but I'm glad I didn't try. He wasn't ready and it would have made my life harder than it needed to be.

I have a two-year ago gap (almost exactly - birthdays four days apart) and then a 22-month age gap. It was fine OP, honestly.

I never had a double buggy for lots of reasons, but others will swear by them; you need to make your own choice about that. We used a combo of sling and pushchair or pushchair and buggyboard.

DD used to sit happily in her bouncy chair as a baby and watch DS1 run about. DS2 was just happy wherever, such an adaptable boy - well, he had to be, with a 3yo and a 1yo to be dealt with.

When you have a second baby, you do wonder what you did all day when you just had one. Babies as a rule do not need someone running about after them - feed, change, sleep, they are good. So you can attend to your toddler. Congratulations.

Agree with others btw, smaller gaps like this mean you never get used to not having a pushchair and all the baby and toddler paraphenalia about. A friend had a six-year gap (on purpose I believe) and of course had ditched all the gubbins and was walking out with a tiny handbag - then had to go right back to nappies and mushed up food. I couldn't have done that.

Yes mine are 2 years and 3 days apart. They are turning 2 and 4 this month. It is bonkers and I can't lie, they do argue a lot but they are also very close and love each other greatly!

@Monkeytapper

24 months here, (3 days between birthdays) all good so far they are 11&13 now and both at high school !..glad we didnt wait long in between.

Aw! The same as my two but mine are 2 and 4

I'd also agree about it being nice to get the baby stage out the way. Mine are almost 5 and 3 now. DD potty trained quite early so we've been without daytime nappies for a while now. It's great. I can go out with just a handbag!

Can't wait to get rid of the pram.

I had this age gap. It was lovely, but exhausting! Neither of my children slept through the night until they were three, so there were a LOT of night wakings. With hindsight, I wish I had sleep trained, but I was worried about waking the older one even more! Or that I had had a less useless husband - one or the other...

My children are 7 and 9 now. They wind each other up constantly, but are each other's absolute best friend and first defender. They have always entertained each other and loved each other fiercly.

The first few months were tricky, as DS had not had the mental capacity to understand the reality (rather than abstract) of a new sibling. He was insanely jealous and would try to physically hurt DD any time he could get to her. As we settled into a 2 child family, and he realised he was not replaced and was just as loved as before, this stopped. By the time DD could move independently, they were each other's favourite person and partner in crime.

22 months between mine. We used to sometimes have a perfect, golden nap with the youngest in a bouncy chair, eldest on one end of the sofa and me asleep on the other end of the sofa. I still remember how incredible that felt in amongst the chaos!

I had an extra seat on the back of the pushchair (couldn't put the youngest flat as you're supposed to due to reflux) and a buggy board. Would use the seat if they were likely to need a sleep.

One thing that worked well was to move DD out of her cot and into a full single bed in her new room, before DS arrived. So it didn't feel as though she was being pushed out.

The great part now is that they're into the same things mostly, they play together and days out are good as they are at a similar level.

@Twizbe

I'd also agree about it being nice to get the baby stage out the way. Mine are almost 5 and 3 now. DD potty trained quite early so we've been without daytime nappies for a while now. It's great. I can go out with just a handbag!

Can't wait to get rid of the pram.

Mine are all grown up but I still recall the joy of leaving the house with just a handbag. I used to take the smallest one I could, to show off to myself that all I needed was a phone, purse and keys

Yes, 23 month gap here too. I agree with PPs that we avoided issues with jealousy and DS adjusting to the new baby because he was so young. The first year was pretty gruelling in terms of sleep deprivation but they’re 11 and 9 now and it’s brilliant that they’re so close in age. They like the same stuff; activities, TV programmes, games. They’ll play together and with each other’s friends. We got the crap sleep / nappies / pushchair stage over all in one go. We don’t have to hang on to “hand-me-down” clothes, waiting for them to be used again; as soon as DS outgrows something it will fit DD (who is fortunately a tomboy so it’s saved us loads of money). They go to bed at the same time (which is good as they share a bedroom) and have the same bedtime story read to them (currently book 7 of Harry Potter).

I won’t sugarcoat how tough the early days might be, but for us it’s paid off! Good luck OP

I have a 29 month age gap, so 6m bigger than yours.

Mine are 5 and 3 now and I love it! They're little buddies (and gang up on me frequently!). The first year was a bit tricky, two in nappies for a while as eldest trained aged 3. I will never forget the pride in getting them to nap simultaneously occasionally. Those were the days I was winning at parenting

You'll be fine!

I have a 23 month age gap and they are about to turn 5 and 7. I wouldn't change it for the world! They are a little team and like the same things, same cartoons, days out, etc. They bicker, but sometimes get an attack of the giggles over the most random thing and it's adorable.

We were out in the town recently and they lost sight of me. I was stood less than 3 metres away but they looking in completely the wrong direction! Their little faces scanning the crowd and clinging on to each other was so cute. They really do love each other and feel safer when the other is nearby.

Standard! You'll be fine .

Mine is 14 months.. you can imagine my reaction to peeing on THAT stick but the are now 10&11 and are great, great mates. Keep each other company

Mine are 22.5 months between 1 and 2
23.5 months between 2 and 3
22.5 months between 3 and 4

They are now coming up 18 20 22 ans 24

A close sibling group who know they have support and they enjoy each others company.

The early years were hard yes but also amazing with laughter and lots of cuddles

going from 1 to 2 with that gap was fine but adding a third 21 months later was the killer for me but that may have been because this was unwell from a few weeks old and managing a poorly baby with a 21 month and 3.5 year old was very hard. Now... they are 18, 16 and 15 and they enjoy being close in age.

Seems like the perfect age gap to me. Mine are 21 months apart.

Same, I'm 3mnths pregnant and have a 13month old so will be a 19mnth gap, I'm soo scared main reason being how tired I always am NOW I try not to think about it much let it surprise me 🥴 what will be will be, goodluck mama