Sorry it's a bit long and complex.
I've somehow managed to find myself attempting to potty train my 21 m/o with no real idea of what i'm doing or even if i should be attempting to train her this early. Basically, a few months ago she started to become much more aware of her movements, and started to say 'poo-poo' although not always when she actually needed to go or had already been. She has also started noticing when she's weeing, for example when i'm changing her and she runs off without her nappy and goes on the carpet she tends to stare down at what she's doing.
A month ago we went to stay with dd's family - both his aunt and uncle are paediatricians, and when i mentioned what she'd been doing they were pretty certain she was ready to start on the potty. So when we got back i did try putting her on whenever she mentioned the magic word, but nothing materialised and she didn't really seem ready, so i put the potty away for a week or so. But she's just become more and more insistant about 'poo poo' etc, so the potty has come out of the cupboard again, and i've been putting her on it in a very casual, no pressure way whenever she says it, but keeping her in pull up nappies as usual. I know a lot of the books say to wait until after the second birthday, and to do it in one fell swoop rather than arsing around the way i am at the moment, but i feel like it's too late to back out now and wait till she's too, but also that i'm going about the whole thing the wrong way.