PTSD and kids' friends

[TTCwithPCOS1]

I have PTSD and CPTSD and one of the main symptoms is severe social anxiety. I used to be selectively mute at one point so that gives an idea of how extreme it is.

My dc are at an age where playdates are becoming more common but it's all parent-led. The kids are asking for their friends to stay over and I've been trying to arrange them with the parents but haven't been successful so far because it seems the mums just arrange them with the parents they're friendly with.

I feel really guilty about it and like I will cause damage by not being able to help them form relationships.

Any suggestions? Apart from saying the kids would love to do something and trying to set it up, I don't know what else I can do.

I'm sorry for your anxiety. My son struggled with selective mutism. It's really not fun.

How old are your children? What's happening when you try to arrange something?

Thank you, I'm sorry your son went through that as well. Hope he's doing better.

The kids are 4 and 3, both very friendly and outgoing.

So far one parent didn't really say anything when I said the kids should get together, one said text me then didn't reply, and one we kept making dates and she kept realising they didn't work until I just said let me know, and it never happened.

I also hear parents talking about birthday parties but mine have never been invited to a single one.

I feel really bad about it. It seems like this means my kids can't have real friendships.

Similar ages to mine (4 and 2)

Play dates have only really been a thing since he started school. He only started talking away from us about 3 weeks before leaving preschool. He talks about friends at school a lot but this weekend is only the first one we've done. He's also only been to 1 birthday party.

It's hard though not to worry that they are missing out on things.

As they get older they will take the lead with these things more (I hope)