How do I tell my husband I don’t want another baby as I hated pregnancy

[JKDcot]

Just looking for advice here please. I have an 18 month old who we both adore more than anything. My husband is a wonderful father.

He would love to have another one but I am a bit old (40) and I hated pregnancy so much that I can’t cope with the thought of it again? I had bad morning sickness and of course being pregnant through Covid lockdown 1 was quite lonely and scary.

I feel so selfish to not want another child just because I didn’t like pregnancy. I know it’s short term and if we were lucky enough to conceive it’s amazing to create a baby. But I seriously don’t know how I could do it and care for a 2 year old? What do I do? I feel so selfish

You need to be honest. I have 3 kids but planned to stop at 2 as my second pregnancy was horrendous (I had hypermesis). My third was a total shock and I could have cried at the thought of going through it all again. It was yet another terrible pregnancy. I have told my dh I am having no more as it’s very unfair on the kids we have and me. I am 41 my body can’t take anymore nor can my mind. I know it’s different as you only have 1 child but if your done your done.

The morning sickness I had in my second pregnancy was no where near as bad as it was the first time. However the tiredness seemed far worse, maybe because I had a toddler to look after as well. I found it really difficult as once the morning sickness and extreme tiredness passed,I got SPD so wasn't able to get out and about much and I got really depressed as was in pain constantly.
I am glad we had another, but I absolutely hated being pregnant both time and really did struggle.
You might find you cope better than me though and if you think you might regret trying for another it would be worth considering.

OP why would it be a joint decision when you're the one carrying the baby, giving birth, taking time off work etc?

Take his feelings into account sure, but his feelings don't trump yours.

I think families with one child are likely to become the trend.

Also bear in mind that when you have a 10 year old you'll be 50/early 50s.

I failed to consider that when I had my 2nd child at 38!

Children do not need siblings, what a load of rubbish. I'm an only and very happy about it, as is my son.

I decided not to have more children after almost dying in child birth. My husband was fine about it, although we had planned more kids, because, you know, having me alive was quite important to him and our existing son.

For what it's worth, a second pregnancy won't necessarily be bad. I was sick as a dog with DC1, but less so with DCs 2 and 3 and coped.