Is my child being bullied?

[Mumstheword8]

Can I have a private post please?

My son recently started reception class and has told me a few times that this girl has hurt him. At first I thought it was accidental maybe running about in the school yard and bumping into each other but we recently went to a birthday party and the said girl was also there. I couldn't believe my eyes, she was constantly by his side, hitting him with a balloon as hard as she could, ripped off his party hat, pushing him and ended up with her arms strangled around his neck and squeezed him all on purpose! She could see how upset that she was making him and no matter how many times I told her not to touch him and to stay away she would not listen, her parent was far from helpful either. At school she is always by his side, it's like she is very possessive of hin and my son has come home today and said that she stuck her leg out when he was playing outside and so he ended up falling over. I've reported all this to school but they still don't seem to be doing anything. It's me that has to find this out from my son, he has told teachers when it's happened too and even when they know there are problems but just don't seem to be taking it seriously. Is this bullying or is this just normal 4 year old behaviour??

That is NOT normal 4 yr old behaviour

Your son is most definitely being bullied. Have a meeting with the head asap and demand they keep this child away from him physically, or move schools. It’s appalling that the school isn’t already addressing this. Your poor son 😭

Hi Skysblue,

Thank you for your reply. I just feel absolutely lost, I've spoken with the head this morning and I'm guessing she reported back to the reception class staff but they never mentioned anything to me about him "falling over" today when I picked him up, even though he has told them it was the said girl that made him fall over. I'm worried from the second I drop him off. He's not being able to make any more friends because she won't leave him alone. He absolutely loves school and this is just making him so sad 😔

I suggest you email the class teacher directly. Try to be unemotional (hard, obviously). Document the occasions this has happened. Ask (if you want) for a meeting to discuss. Make it clear you have no ill will towards the child (even if you do)- it is possible she has needs and is already known to staff. Explain that you are worried for your child’s welfare as it is seriously impacting upon his willingness to attend school.

Email every time it happens. However small.

This may be unfair, but in my experience showing that you are a parent who is measured but willing to push for assistance gets best results.

No harm in mugging up on school anti bullying and safeguarding policies, which state what they should be doing. These should be available on the website, or ask at the office (so they know you're looking at them).

Definitely not normal behaviour, this must be making him really unhappy. You need to push the school until you get some real answers and see some changes put in place.

I would get hold of the anti bullying policy and arrange a meeting with the teacher to discuss. Use the word bullying and focus on the impact on your son rather than complaining about the girl (if you know what I mean). I’m sorry just be awful :(