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Life with a toddler and a baby

4 replies

Twizbe · 03/10/2021 20:13

Facebook just reminded me that I wrote this 2 years ago today ... it might amuse some of you

I was thinking this morning that trying to get a toddler and baby ready to leave the house, is a lot like being the sober person at the end of a party trying to get the last two drunk guests home safely.

Drunk Person 1 (the toddler) starts by staggering around the room clutching a cup of their favourite drink. No attempt to remove this drink is successful as they at once don’t want to finish it nor let it out of their sight.

Amazingly they are also able to disrobe while holding this drink. Any attempts by Sober Person (parent) to clothe Drunk Person 1 (toddler) are met with shouts of ‘I can do it!!!’ ... which they quickly demonstrate not to be the case.

Once Sober Person (parent) has successful convinced Drunk Person 1 (toddler) that clothes are required outside the house, they decide that an inanimate object is their ‘bestest friend’ and HAS to go with with. This ‘bestest friend’ is promptly lost down the back of the sofa. Such a devastating loss causes the previously happy Drunk Person 1 (toddler) to descend into a crying fit which delays any further attempt to fit shoes / coats.

Finally Drunk Person 1 (toddler) is in a fit state to be seen outside the house. Before they have a chance to remove any article of clothing attention turns to Drunk Person 2 (baby). Drunk Person 2 (baby) has been sat this whole time, cheerfully giggling to herself enjoying the show put on by Drunk Person 1 (toddler). As Sober Person (parent) finishes doing up her coat, she looks up, big blue angelic eyes sparkling as she quietly poos herself ....

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
firstimemamma · 03/10/2021 20:15

Oh god! When my next baby arrives in March ds will be 3 and a half so no longer a toddler. Will it still be like that??

Twizbe · 03/10/2021 20:20

@firstimemamma

Oh god! When my next baby arrives in March ds will be 3 and a half so no longer a toddler. Will it still be like that??
Hopefully not. When I wrote this mine were 2 years 8 months and 8 months. It was a particularly bad morning lol.
OP posts:
Grasshopper90 · 04/10/2021 14:33

😂

My DC2 is due in December when DD1 will be 2y 2m. Thank you for the reality check! Will try to remember to keep a sense of humour...

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CelloYouveGotABass · 04/10/2021 14:49

21m gap when number 2 arrives in December, hopefully I’ll have your humour!

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