14 month old BB not sleeping through

[Jademarisha]

Hi ladies

So my son is 14 months old and he isnt sleeping through the night. He has never really been a good sleeper during the night but the last few months or so he has been a little terror 🙃 we have the whole sleep training down to a T however he is still waking up for milk. We have him in our room as we are in a one bedroom apartment but in two weeks time we are moving to a 3 bed house which is going to be amazing for all of us!
So my question is how can we start to train him to not want milk during the night? He has a really good intake of water, snacks and food during the day but he has no milk only before bed and in his food (Our DB is dairy intolerant if that is any help) me and partner are battling between each other because although yes I am one exhausted mumma I'm not really wanting to leave him to cry especially if he is crying out of hunger. He clears a 6oz bottle before he goes to bed usually at 6pm but then he will wake up 3/4 times a night either banging on his cot and babbling or crying and being quiteloud.
We have spoken to our HV who to be honest didn't really help she said to slowly drop an Oz at a time each night which we did but then he still woke up. She then suggested to offer him water instead of milk which again we did and DB would have a few mouthfuls or he would completely push it away.

I'm now really stuck on what to do and both me and my hubby are tired 😴
Also a little side note I suffer with anxiety quite badly and the thought of leaving him to cry (especially if he is crying because he is hungry) really sets my anxiety off. So if anyone has any tips on this subject I would really appreciate it lovelies.

It’s fairly normal a baby to not sleep through the night.

Can I ask what you mean by dairy intolerant? What milk is he on? What does he eat during the day?

Waking 3/4 times a night isn’t normal at 14 months tbh. (And I say that having had awful sleepers).

Why don’t you give him milk in the day - after meals if you don’t want it to affect his eating.
Could he be teething?

We just gradually lengthened the time between sleep and night feed. So at first if she woke up before she'd been asleep for three hours, I wouldn't offer milk, just cuddles and comforting. Then four hours. Etc. We knew she wasn't hungry as she was eating well and having plenty during the day and before bed, it was just about breaking the habit. She was breastfed but the principle is the same I think.

She was never left to cry or anything like that. She did cry a bit but one of us was with her and offering cuddles and comfort so I didn't have an issue with it. Tears are communication; it doesn't always mean they are distraught. In DD's case she was just annoyed.

I would go cold turkey, only offer water on waking. You don't have to leave him to cry you can cuddle, comfort whatever you want. Not guaranteed that he will start sleeping through though. For us first 3 nights were awful, slept through within a week.

So our little boy has an allergy to dairy. So everytime he has something with cow's milk he gets a really upset tummy and has an explosive nappy and he be becomes short of breath etc. We have started the milk ladder and have started to slowly to add dairy back into his diet.

So milk wise he has cow and gate stage 3 at night and then he has the 1-3 years alpro milk if we are mixing it with his food so if has eggs or cereal for example then we give him alpro.

But cow & gate stage 3 has cow’s milk in it? So maybe his bedtime bottle is making him feel unwell during the night?

Personally, I would give him formula. Does he settle back down soon after getting formula? Does he drain the bottle? If so, it's clear he is hungry and wants it.

I don't agree with people who say to "train" children not to eat/drink at night. It is harmful to tell children to ignore their natural hunger cues and can cause problems with over eating and obesity later in life.

Put it this way, if you wake up with hunger or thirst in the middle of the night, do you lie awake for hours trying trying ignore it or get yourself something?