is it ever possible to "judge" (ie condemn) someone's parenting on a single criteria?

[hatwoman]

This parenting lark is a complex business. so is the definition of a "good" parent. The idea of being able to say that it is never possible to be a Good Parent (ergo you are a Bad Parent) because of one aspect of your parenting/behaviour is, imo laughable.

is it possible to be a good parent and take drugs?
is it possible to be a good parent and break the law?
is it possible to be a good parent and get shit-faced once a week?
is it possible to be a good parent and eat meat? have plastic toys? shop at Asda? abuse apostrophes?

imho to say an unqualified "no" to any of these is ridiculous. it's shallow and somewhat lacking in the solidarity that parents could do with. It can also come across as a tad arrogant.

glad I got that off my chest.

I used to pretend to be one ALLLLL the time!

stripeymama - as long as your kid isn't running around with her knickers on her head then I think you're doing ok.

So does DD. In fact, she thinks she is Pegasus at the moment.

Its probably cos all that exposure to adults who may once have tried drugs has addled her brain.

Not on her head. She has got a 'battleman's hat' (silver plastic helmet with visor) on her head.

Does that make me a Bad Mother - warlike toys?

oh what a lovely bit of light releief this thread is.

(vacua - i was born in a squat. should we hang my parents now of a bit later? )

after we've disembowelled me for, well, just about everything really

PMSL at ketamine in a squat.

This thread is light relief.

at stripeymama's dreads. I never did do dreads. Always wanted to but feel it would be wrong to start to cultivate them at 40. Boat well and truly missed.

I partied in squats.
< blissful grin >

my heuristic play box is not cutting it, is it?

lol cammilla - i have those too. yes, they count (to me)

DD had knickers on her head before

if that helps

i had a nose ring a long time ago

maybe not to these hardcore hippies we are conversing amongst, a breed i can only claim to be a child of, not an active member

oh pierced nose! yes, much cred there (hehehe this is fun)

I'm totally digging your willful negelct heuristic play ideas Camilla.

In fact it's called benign neglect and it's all the rage in smart London parenting circles in Islington. Or something.

Dreads create paranoia far more effectively than drugs - nit paranoia anyway.

And they mean that other mothers do not talk to you at the school gates.

Mine are pretty crap at the moment though - will put pic on my profile if I can work out how.

I was too chicken to brave the school run in dreads. I came within a whisker of home educating, in which case dreads would have been a cultural requirement.

Don't worry about the school run. They're jealous and in awe. I am anyway.

oooo I have my nose pierced. never wore rings - only studs and I haven;t worn one for years. does this say anything about my parenting?

Have loaded picture I think. They are really rather wussy - I've only been growing this lot for a year. They have purple/turquoise extensions in now ('pretty' says DD)

spider/stripey mamas - you do realise that your names csan ve similarly dont you? i thought you were one and the same for a bit on that other thread, till you started talking to each other, like.

'scan very'

sorry. i type like cod.

ooh I like your dreads stripey, I'd def talk to you at school gate

Stripey very nice. Do you bind them in a big phat pony tail and wear elfy skirts? I would. You could blend in quite nicely in central Brighton btw.

Brandy there's a Spidermum too who I get confused with. Luckily she rarely makes appearances these days but I remember when she announced her 5th pregnancy on here everyone kept congratulating me and I thought 'Ugh?'

Er, I tie them in a knot to stop them getting in my lines of coke tea.