3mo up every 2 hours

[Cocopops2017]

As per the subject line my son has just turned 3 months and is still up every 2 hours in the night. I’m a first time mum and I’m not complaining and I didn’t expect sleep to be something I got a lot of once I had a baby. But it just seems that everyone else’s babies - even ones younger than mine - are ‘sleeping through’. I can cope and function on the little sleep I am getting but it’s starting to make me feel 1) resentful of those whose babies are sleeping through the night and 2) worried that my baby isn’t progressing like he should.
I am grateful that he seems to know the difference between day and night now and actually it doesn’t take a lot to get him down. It’s just knowing that he will be up every 2 hours and that sleep time just isn’t increasing no matter how much milk he has had. He can now take about 6oz whereas before the most he would take was 4 and yet that doesn’t seem to make a difference in the length of time he will sleep.
He was fairly small at birth (6lbs) and still only just 13lbs now so I wonder if that’s something to do with it.
Just to reiterate, I’m not complaining, I know babies are supposed to wake in the night and their tummies are tiny etc etc. I suppose what I’m looking for - as a new mum - is a bit of reassurance that not everyone’s baby at this age is sleeping through the night! Because like I said before I can cope and I’m quite used to it now, it just knocks me for six when I hear others saying their babies sleep for 12 solid hours! I’m also not comparing myself (even if it sounds like I am) I’m just wondering if anyone else is in my boat as I won’t feel so alone!
Also, if your baby does sleep through, I’m very happy for you but please don’t tell me that on this thread as that’s just not productive and frankly the last thing I need to hear! 😂
Thanks in advance to any replies

Other babies aren’t sleeping through. A tiny proportion of little babies sleep through (most of them will stop at four months), a lot of parents exaggerate or say what they think ought to be the case.

Congratulations, you have a normal, healthy baby!

Try to put the other babies sleeping through out of your mind. Often things are not as they seem e.g some people count 12am-5am as 'sleeping through'. My ds slept 7pm-7am from age 1 then at 18 months it all went out of the windows so nothing lasts forever anyway!

My ds first slept through at 10 months which is actually pretty normal. Babies are meant to wake at night. It is rough but try to hang in there. Your baby is still very young

Thank you @AMostExcellentStick and @firstimemamma you’re both right I need to take what I hear with a pinch of salt and also not focus on it as my baby is healthy and that’s all that matters

Yeah, what @firstimemamma said. I have friends who said theirs were ‘sleeping through’ they meant 11pm to 5am. Mine slept from 7pm to 2am, same length just a different part of the night. They get there eventually and it just makes you feel annoyed by comparing.
I didn’t do anything different to get my LO sleeping through, it just happened around 15 months when they were ready.

@Sarahisaduck yeah I completely agree it only leaves me annoyed if I compare. The thing is though I never ask they just love to tell me so it’s hard to get away from 😆

Anyway this has helped me today so thank you everyone. I knew there was nothing wrong with my baby it’s just nice to get some perspective sometimes.

It's so annoying when people tell you about their babies sleeping through. When my DD was 6 months, I started going to baby groups as lockdown ended and I was shocked when the mums were telling me that their babies sleep through for 12 hours. I thought my baby's sleep (waking 5-6 times a night at that point) was normal and it made me worry if I was doing everything wrong. Actually, lots of babies don't sleep through for ages and sleep goes through good and bad phases anyway.

Also it's worth remembering that no one actually sleeps through, even adults. We all wake slightly at the end of each sleep cycle and go back to sleep. You won't be aware of it as you drift back off straight away. Babies also wake at the end of every cycle and there are 'settlers' who settle themselves back to sleep and 'signallers' who cry for a care giver to help them get back to sleep. The vast majority of babies are signallers.

My dd was up every two hours until 10 months then went on to 18 months still waking at 3/4. I was insanely jealous of everyone who I thought were getting hours or uninterrupted sleep. Now dd is the best sleeper, from 18 months she did 12 hours straight every night

My LO is 8 months old and is up at least every two hours!

My DS would only sleep on me for the first 2 months. From 2 to 4 months he would wake every 1-3 hours. From 4-6 months he miraculously slept long stretches, up to 8 hours, waking only 1/2 times a night. At 6 months he started waking every 2 hours again, and now at 10 months wakes 3-5 times a night but we have good and bad nights.

My point is you'll go through lots of mini-phases, as will all your friends. In our NCT group some had great sleepers at first who then had terrible regressions... all have had good and bad phases.

My advice is 1) don't compare your baby with others... no 2 babies' sleep are the same! 2) just roll with the phases and do what you need to do to maximise sleep for everyone (we've been co-sleeping for months now)

Hope it improves for you soon!

My DS is just about to turn 6 months and he still wakes every 2 hours most nights. He’s EBF and we ended up co-sleeping (following the lullaby trust guidelines) as he wouldn’t go to sleep in his next to me crib. I’m used to it now. He’s just starting to sleep for short bursts in his crib so I’m hopeful someday in the future he’ll sleep well. Hope this also makes you feel better

Babies, and not only, sleep in cycles of about 2 hours. Something is making him not going back to sleep easily.
It is usually said that they expect their surroundings to be the same as when they fell asleep. So, if he falls asleep feeding, or being held, he's likely to miss it after those two hours. That is why it can help to put them down before they are actually asleep.
Another thing that can help is swaddling, as they may thrash about and not feel secure.
But, and IME, babies also sleep more poorly at developmental changes. It could be teeth or something else. And we just need to ride it.

My DD is 11 weeks and DH tells everyone that she sleeps through which isn’t exactly true at all!!!! She feeds anywhere up to midnight (when he goes to bed) and then again around 3am (he’s asleep!) and then again around 6am (when he gets up!) so for him 6 hours is sleeping through the night-it totally isn’t for me!!
You’re not alone, I promise you.

Thanks everyone I really appreciate it 😊

Do any of your mum friends bf? Cause if they do their babies arent sleeping through. The only babies i knew who slept through early were formula fed. I wont say how long it took two of mine 3 but it didnt have weeks of months after it and we had an excellent routine , consistent blah blah.
Definitly normal at that age!

My twins can barely do two hours and not at the same time!

2 hours is actually pretty good for a 3 month old in my opinion. I’d personally be a bit worried if my baby was sleeping through at that age!

I’ve got two kids and have parented them both the same and they couldn’t be more different sleepers. DS1 is nearly 4 and was a truly horrible sleeper until about 2. He still sleeps in bed with us now. DS2 is 17 weeks and slept through at 9 weeks. He slept 10 hours solid last night. Both were/are breastfed. I feel like I’ve had two babies on extreme ends of the spectrum and the norm is probably somewhere in the middle. Your sleep situation sounds totally normal and I promise you it will get better.

My baby is formula fed and has been since day one- I guess this is just how he is and that’s fine, at least I know where I stand and he’s pretty consistent!!