"Breastmilk is like chocolate"......

[grey12]

As per DC3's health visitor

Background: DC3 is nearly 1 year old and hasn't really taken to food. I have introduced several foods but she mainly chews a bit and spits it out, coupled with the fact that she is going through her "throw everything on the floor" phase.....

Now, I'm not a stressy FTM.... she's doing well! She's developing well, hitting all the milestones, very social, very happy. We have no concerns about her. She does have her baby rolls DC1 was much slimmer!

But comparing breastmilk to chocolate is crossing a line! I get it that it can be a comfort thing but she's doesn't complain about being offered food, she just doesn't really eat it. And breastmilk is good food for a baby. My understanding is that at this age food is a complement to BF and not the opposite.... I find it upsetting because it isn't the first time a HV has made a bit of a dangerous comment to me. I'm an educated person so I just laugh it off, but other people will take it at face value

She was actually born a little smaller than her sisters (but what can I do about that?!) and with Covid the last time she was properly weighed was at 2 months she wasn't even measured at birth!!!! What am I supposed to write in her baby book? (don't actually have a baby book.... child no3, remember? ) So, HV has put her on a waiting list (!!!!) to be weighed. Why has everything become so challenging with Covid?! What a strange service to cut

No @Janek they don't get enough. By 5 months baby is running out of the reserves it is born with and so they need iron really early in, b milk doesn't provide much iron at all. I know, I speak from the view of a b feeding mother who had an anaemic baby at 6 months. Granted, I lost blood at birth and no one even mentioned iron to me, and I didn't think 🤦‍♀️😬

I seem to remember reading that breast milk and chocolate have the same fat:sugar ratios, and that’s why we like chocolate so much… I could have made that up though..

BBC says it’s true!

www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/health-39067088.amp

Also with regards to iron, b milk has a lot less iron than formula but is easily absorbable, formula has lots more but is more difficult to absorb. However, formula still more than trumps b milk as far as iron us concerned

Oooh love that link @Holly60 the HV was right! 🤣

Stop seeing the health visitor, always full out outdated 'advice'. It was I agree an awful comment and completely unhelpful. I would actually complain.

It's not a helpful comment. It's a common misconception that children "filling up" on breast milk is a problem when it really isn't. It's full of nutrients and as long as they have access to a variety of other foods, it's perfectly safe to let them figure out how much food and how much breastmilk to have. They don't carry on drinking breastmilk as their main form of nutrition forever.

It's not the same with formula because formula won't and can't adapt to a child's needs. And cows milk, although a more appropriate milk than formula past age 1 barely meets any of their needs. I assume this is where the advice comes from, but it's not appropriate to treat breastfeeding the same as formula.

Just because it contains sugars and fats doesn't make it unhealthy. Children need sugars and fats for their development.

@grey12 can I ask what tips she gave you? I'm ebf dc2 and she just won't eat! Nearly 9 months old and totally non plussed by both purée and baby led weaning.

My first child didn't really eat other than breastfeeding until he was 22 months old btw, so I went through all of this! Of course I tried restricting his feeding to see if it helped. It didn't, it just made him refuse food even more as well as being incredibly distressing. He was also quite capable of differentiating between wanting breastmilk and being hungry because they clearly felt different to him, after he was about 1, breastfeeding wouldn't fill him up if he was hungry. It had to be food. He could make that very clear.

He got there when he was ready. He is 13 now and doesn't breastfeed any more :o actually he would live off ramen and chocolate if you would let him. Maybe I ruined him :o

I don't see a massive issue with what she said tbh, certainly not dangerous to stop breastfeeding a nearly 1 year old. She's full of milk so isn't eating, seems quite logical

That might be OK if the baby was eating well .... although still sub-optimal - breastmilk is still just about the most complete nutrition source available at age 1. But until baby is eating well then it's a good idea to keep up the bf, not be told it's like chocolate

We say this about my son all the time, my husband is a chocoholic and my son is the same way with the breast! I can't say I'd be offended, HV sometimes dish out reasonable advice and sometimes utter nonsense. Maybe her style doesn't suit you but I really don't think it's dangerous.... loads of kids stop breastfeeding way before 1 so there's no danger. Hope you are OK, sounds like she's hit a nerve, keep doing what you're doing and ignore them!

@Bluntness100

She’s not actually that wrong and it was a good comparison to make. Food is not a complement it’s necessary, she was trying to tell you she’s filling herself on sweet milk so doesn’t want normal food. Yout baby is one now, she does need more than breast milk ideally.

Has she hit a nerve. What she said wasn’t dangerous, and I doubt she was trying to hurt you, more explain it in terms she thought you’d understand,

Exactly this. You're taking it way too personally.

I think you're massively over reacting tbh

I’d ignore the people who don’t think it’s an issue and those that push dropping breastfeeding
kellymom.com/nutrition/vitamins/iron/

There are so many misconceptions out there about breastfeeding.

@Holly60 thanks for explaining why I love chocolate. I will blame it on having been breastfed! I think the health visitor was just trying to illustrate why babies would prefer the taste of breast milk, added to the closeness of feeding and the ease of getting it. Some parents are too easily offended.

Can I offer you my 3 kids (mainly my 2 boys) as a case study op? Both EBF, then did BLW. 1st boy (2nd child) evidently more than ready, took to food almost immediately, eating meals by around 7 months. 2nd just not interested, he definitely followed the 'food before 1 is just for fun' BLE mantra! It drove my Mother and at least 1 HV mad because I stuck to my guns on it, but he was happy, super healthy and evidently thriving. Some point around 1st birthday it was like a switch was flicked and he just began eating. He was BF up to 2.5 but it was no longer main food source obviously. DD (1st child) was somewhere in between 2 and I also did some purees with her as too nervous to go with my instincts at that stage.) My point is, all children are different, people will always try and pigeon hole them into the same routine. If your baby is healthy and thriving then what you are doing works! Both my boys now tall, slim, healthy lads with good appetites. They've both gone through fussy stages and come out of the other side of them so the amount of 'chocolate' BM the had evidently made zero difference.

www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/health-39067088.amp

"In nature such high levels of sugar and fat are rarely found, or at least not together.
You can get lots of natural sugars from fruits and roots, and there is plenty of fat to be found in nuts or a tasty chunk of salmon, but one of the few places where you will find both together is in milk.
Human breast milk is particularly rich in natural sugars, mainly lactose. Roughly 4% of human breast milk is fat, while about 8% is made up of sugars. Formula milk, which is fed to babies, contains a similar ratio of fats to sugars.
This ratio, 1g of fat to 2g of sugars, is the same ratio of fats to sugars that you find in milk chocolate. And in biscuits, doughnuts, ice cream. In fact this particular ratio is reflected in many of the foods that we find hard to resist.
So why do I love chocolate? For a whole host of reasons. But it may also be that I, and chocoholics like me, are trying to recapture the taste and sense of closeness we got from the first food we ever sampled; human breast milk."

Clearly it wasn't a helpful thing to say or you wouldn't be posting here. For evidence based advice, have a look at:
professoramybrown.co.uk.

My personal position fwiw: babies generally self regulate their food/ fluid well, we tend to wean from breast milk early in UK and you can't MAKE a child eat. I'd also be wondering whether a similar comment would be made if you were providing a small cup/bottle of (cows') milk just as often, keeping in mind that breastfeeding is designed to provide small volumes regularly. In summary, if baby is healthy and growing, and you are ok with the pattern of feeding, I'd ignore.

I would share your annoyance at a HV giving advice that blatantly fails to support breastfeeding. I'm not sure I would have confidence to tackle it directly but I might feed it back informally to the local infant feeding team. They need to know these messages are going out, and how they are received, so they can educate staff better.

I'd also be wondering whether a similar comment would be made if you were providing a small cup/bottle of (cows milk)

Yes of course if the child was only having cows milk of course there would also be concern, cows milk is not as sweet or comforting though for most.

HVs say all sorts of nonsensical things - mine told me the reason I had mastitis was because my 'skin was too white - pale women like you always get mastitis'. I just laughed it off.

Incidentally, my kiddos were all exclusively BF for the first 12 months. None of them had an interest in solids before that. BF is a complete food, not just a snack as you know. You're doing all the right things, just ignore the HV - often us mums really do know better!

@Newmum29

Why is it either or though- breastmilk or junk food?

Chocolate is occasional treat food..... BM isn't even close to being considered treat food let alone occasional!

[quote loveacupoftea18]@grey12 can I ask what tips she gave you? I'm ebf dc2 and she just won't eat! Nearly 9 months old and totally non plussed by both purée and baby led weaning.[/quote]
HV suggested someone else offer her food instead of me so the boobies aren't around

Chocolate is occasional treat food..... BM isn't even close to being considered treat food let alone occasional!

I think you’re being very pedantic. The HV was obviously not making this kind of comparison between breast milk and chocolate - it was simply about illustrating your child’s preferences. You’re just determined to take offence and these far fetched comparisons are all in your head - the HV doesn’t think your breasts are filled with Options Belgian hot chocolate

@MiddlesexGirl

I don't see a massive issue with what she said tbh, certainly not dangerous to stop breastfeeding a nearly 1 year old. She's full of milk so isn't eating, seems quite logical

That might be OK if the baby was eating well .... although still sub-optimal - breastmilk is still just about the most complete nutrition source available at age 1. But until baby is eating well then it's a good idea to keep up the bf, not be told it's like chocolate

People are saying the HV "hit a nerve". But that is wrong. My "nerve" is health professionals not being careful with their words. DD1 was the very slim child and somehow a HV implied she was overweight and that I needed to "watch her diet" she was saying this staring at her screen instead of looking at the skinny child in front of her (who never had funk food and loves broccoli). I did make a formal complaint at that time.

@MiddlesexGirl got the point I was trying to make

Breast milk is only suitable as a main source of nutrition up until the baby is 6 months, from then on they need good in addition. At the age your child is at I would agree with the health visitor that food is first and milk is an addition to the food as the milk won't be providing baby with enough calories and nutrients