Innapropriate touching- your advice needed please!

[MarkStretch]

A friend who doesn't MN has asked me to post this as she needs advice.

She has a 5yr old dd and sometimes looks after her friends 6yr old ds. He comes over to play and on a couple of occasions now her dd has told her that friends ds has asked her to touch him. She (dd) is obviously distressed by this and friends ds often knows he has done wrong and asks to go home soon after it has occured.

She has spoken to friend about her ds behaviour by friend blames it on dd as apparently he 'never does it with any other girl'.

My friends is really upset and has tried to comfort her dd but is really unsure about how to handle it.

Please help!

If the friend blames it on her DD then TBH I'd stop having the friend's DS round.

If she has already mentioned it to the other mum and ishe isn't prepared to try and stop him doing it, then I am afraid I would halt the friendship netween DD and the biy for a while, until she was happy to sort it out.

That is an opition- think she is concerned about how to handle the subject with her dd who is very upset by it all as well.

What happened to children playing doctors and nurses? I hate to say it, but I am sure this must happen a lot with children this age, but if your friend's dd doesn't like it, then she should be told to say no and I would have thought that would be the end of it.

Just reiterate to DD that she doesn't need to worry about it, that she just stands her ground and says no, that she is right to say no, and tell mummy/daddy/other adult straight away if it happens again. And that her private bits are just that - for her alone to touch.

I think reassure her daughter that no one has the right touch her or to ask her to touch them in a way that makes her feel uncomfortable and that she did exactly the right thing to tell her about it.

MumpBump, yes kids play doctors and nurses but her friend's dd is obviously upset and this has happened before I gather. It's also very strange that a mother could blame her son's actions on a 5yo girl.

If I were your friend I would tell the mother that your dyo dd does not encourage this, does not like it and perhaps the only reason he tries it on with her is because she is quiet? Perhaps less confident than his other girl playmates? Or maybe he doesn't have any other girl playmates? In any case she needs to tell her ds that his actions are inappropriate and he should stop. If she isn't doing this then he'll just carry on doing it.

Nothing wrong with curiosity, but this 5yo girl is upset by it all and the mother of the boy is behaving in a very strange way.

I think you might be right rhubarb- she is a quiet little girl, but I am outraged that said friend could blame her son's behaviour on a 5 yr old