4 year old started reception and is acting strange. Breaking my heart

[TEDZ]

My 4 year old is on her 2nd week of reception (new to her previous nursery). She is quite a sensitive soul anyway but always smiling and confident and loves being around other kids. Since she started her behaviour has changed. She’s not as chirpy, keeps telling me she loves me and won’t leave my side. She also cries every morning going in but seems to settle after 10-15 mins. Today she wouldn’t walk a certain way because there were flower petals from a tree on the floor and she said she was worried about them and they need to be cleaned up. She had genuine fear in her eyes and talked about it the whole way to school. This to me, is irrational and I worry it’s a symptom of the anxiety she’s having going to school. She’s also being really sensitive to certain sounds, not necessarily loud sounds just random sounds will cause her to cover her ears. Has anyone had any experience with children starting school and isolating anxious symptoms? Should I give her more time to transition and adjust or take her to see her GP? Thanks x

*displaying anxious symptoms.

I work in Reception and I would honestly for now say give it time. These children have seen 18 months of their lives in lockdown and already we have seen many behaviours that we would not normally see in our new children- anxieties, behaviours, some have never been to a pre school setting or playgroup because they just weren't operating. Keep all talk of school positive and plan some nice treats for after school, an ice lolly on the way home, perhaps. Let these little people adapt to the very strange world they have just come out of.

It does sounds like she's finding it overwhelming. Hopefully she'll settle in soon. Could the noises relate to it being noisy at school and the tree thing to clean up for tidy up time at school?
You could mention to the teacher she is very anxious, so the staff could keep an eye out for her. If it doesn't improve you could see the GP.
Not the same thing, but dd developed a phobia at about 7/8 which made her anxious every day and the GP was helpful and referred her to CAMHs. This was 10 years ago though so it might be harder to get help now without paying, I'm not sure

I have worked in schools and now work with children with mental health difficulties. It sounds like your DD may be experiencing anxiety about school but I think it's important to normalise these feelings as it is a normal reaction for a 4 year old (or anyone for that matter!) to feel anxious about a new class and a new school. I understand why some of her behaviours may be a little alarming to you but I wouldn't find these too worrying personally. It is likely just her little brain's way of making sense and processing a situation.

It may help to name some of these feelings for her "Are you feeling a bit worried about school today? Would you like to talk about it?" But also to remain positive and encourage her to think about the positive experiences she is having at her new school. Ultimately you know your LO best and if you are worried then always seek help but I think she may just need a little extra support getting through this tricky time for her.

Also, with the flower petals on the floor, I would just turn it around to something positive to ease her anxiety a little. For example, you might say "Oh don't worry, that's just the tree spreading confetti to celebrate you going to school, shall we make some confetti after school together?"

Thanks so much for your replies, I feel slightly better now. I’ve picked her up today and she seems much more like herself, refused to walk by the petals though so I said that’s fine, don’t want to push her too much. It doesn’t help that I’m 7 months pg with no2, my hormones are everywhere and this could also possibly be playing on little ones mind even though she doesn’t seem too interested?

xx

Also she’s currently under SALT for a speech delay although they advised of her next assessment is the same she will be discharged. She is able to communicate quite well now although I worry she’s struggling to find the words to express how she feels. I’ve created a mood board for her but she always picks happy and calm, little fibber hahaha :)