Nursery worries

[Mamatoabeauty]

Anyone else get stressed out/suffer with anxiety about how well their child is being looked after in nursery. There haven’t been any incidents and the staff seem nice but not being allowed in the building means I’ve never observed how they treat or heard how a child is spoken to without parents there. I’m so worried that her needs aren’t being met or that she is just left to cry- always seems sad when I pick her up. I wish she was at the age she could talk to tell me about her day.

My son ALWAYS cried at pickup. But the nursery tells me he's really happy all day. The other day they told me to peep through the window before I picked him up to see him happy. And he was - he was having a great time. The reason I put him in nursery instead of with a child minder is because I felt I could trust a nursery more and be less anxious. And so far it's been all good.

Not really to be honest. I've not been in etc but can hear everything at pick up before they know I'm there and as pp has said can peer through the window. Also if I turn up as I've forgotten something or abit early I can see them all having fun outside. Your picking them up when they are knackered etc so don't go on that. If your concerned speak to them.

Yes I chose a nursery for the exact same reason! How long has your son been going if you don’t mind me asking? The windows are really high up unfortunately otherwise I’d definitely do this. I can listen whilst they’re in the garden but I have no idea what time they go out and also don’t want to look like a crazy woman!!

No. I ADORE our nursery. It’s small & the staff are a joy. It’s a lovely environment, I haven’t been in but I have stuck my head in the door. There are 5 staff in her room & they all chat & tell you about the day. My 18 month old daughter loves it. 🤷🏼‍♀️

How can you possibly observe how the staff speak to the kids without the parents? You’ll be in the room so if they didn’t speak nicely, they’d probably change their tune 🙈

Does the nursery have a good local rep? That should help? How does your DD seem sad?

Thanks @SlB09, I might try and listen in as the windows are usually open. Think I have separation anxiety and not being able to reassure myself drives me mad sometimes!

“How can you possibly observe how the staff speak to the kids without the parents? You’ll be in the room so if they didn’t speak nicely, they’d probably change their tune 🙈“

I’ve seen plenty of posts (precovid) about people picking up their children and overhearing staff speak or do something negative when they didn’t know they were listening. It obviously depends on the set up but think it’s quite plausible to hear a member of staff talk to a child when the don’t know your listening

And yes they have a outstanding ofsted and highly recommended on local social media pages - it helped initially but now she’s there I want some kind of reassurance - I’m being irrational I know!

Argh I just wrote a long message and lost it!! My son is 14 months old. He's been in nursery since he was 6 months but we changed nurseries a months ago which was stressful (we relocated or would never have moved him). I also have a toddler (almost 3) but he can talk so at least he tells me he's happy there. I guess ultimately we just have to trust that they're okay there... there's not really an alternative right now unfortunately!

And you're not being at all irrational. I would never in a million years have imagined putting my children in a nursery that I'd never visited with staff I'd never met (they go full time!) before covid happened. And it is hard. But I would still prefer nursery to a childminder and I don't want to give up my career to stay at home with the boys ... so I just have to trust!

Thanks @surreygirl1987! Yes I think your right. Just have to trust 😫. It’s not a major issue it’s just bothering me more as time goes on. I’m hoping they once she’s been there a few more months she will come out smiling lol