Nursery pick up: state of DD

[LoveableLou]

My daughter attends nursery two days a week and each time I collect her I’m surprised at how mucky she is. I fully appreciate she’s going to get more grubby than when she’s at home, but I feel like basic personal care is being overlooked.

This week she had thick crust under her nose where it had been running and no one had wiped it, her hair looked like Ken Dodd and her cardie clearly had bits of food on it despite me asking them to use a bib.

Are all nurseries like this or is it reasonable to expect them to give the kids a quick wipe before parents arrive?

@RosyPoesy

This is one of the reasons I didn’t feel comfortable putting my DC in nursery until at least 3 when they could do the basics for themselves. I don’t think nursery workers give kids sufficient attention and care - how can they when they’ve got 30 kids. My friend’s DC has been known to come out of nursery with bite marks and skiddy pants due to not being wiped properly, it’s awful.

There’s always one.

We never had that at our nursery, and we had kids there for 8 years.

They did get messy. They did rub food and paint and on one memorable occasion glue through their hair. They did get stains in places I didn’t think you could get stains. I did occasionally have to clean the last bits of paint from between their toes.

They did have a happy, fulfilling, rich experience with all sorts of stuff I would never have done at home with people who are really good at what they do. My kids are 10 and 6 now and still talk fondly about their nursery teachers and friends.

I’m in 2 minds OP. I’ve got two DC and have used 2 nurseries. The first DC1 used to come home filthy, literally filthy, covered in dirt, clothes often wet etc (never dirty nappy and always very happy! They did LOADS of outdoor play in their big garden). Sometimes I used to think bloody hell they are a state (I’m not finickety but I’d always change her if that messy). Nursery 2 that DC2 went to was the opposite. They did lots of outdoor play (granted they have fake grass but a mud kitchen etc). DC2 often gets through clothes but is always clean, hair tied back, no snotty nose etc on collection. Both fab nurseries but to be honest I do feel the more recent one take a little bit more care of them and keep on top of their personal hygiene and stuff. It didn’t bother me with the first but I do appreciate it now!

When mine started at a nursery with a big garden we were told to send them in old clothes as they would be outside whenever the weather permitted. They had a fab time and still remember nursery fondly . Had it still been open they would have sent their own children there .

Snot and actual food should be wiped up. Not sure how old she is but you could encourage her to wipe her own nose. They're not going to put her in waterproofs to do water play- if she gets too covered they'll change her clothes but they'd never get anything done if they put every child in waterproofs. If it's long enough, put her hair in bands or clips, they'll likely redo it rather than find a hairband and do it for her. A headband/aliceband might work for her.

Filthy and happy is good Snotty sore nose is not

Thanks all. I just feel there's a difference between grubbiness from all the activities and grubbiness from not having your basic care needs met. I couldn't really give a monkeys about the day's activities if it's meant she's sitting in a soaked top and has a caked nose.

My daughter wears a bib, still comes home covered in food. Her speciality is sitting in the water play area regardless of if they are using it or not, and regularly find she's covered in paint in her hair. I send her in stuff I'm not fussed about. They always try to wipe her nose, but it runs faster than I can keep up in. But she's so excited to go, I can live with a filthy child on the bus home.

I couldn't really give a monkeys about the day's activities if it's meant she's sitting in a soaked top and has a caked nose.

Was she in a wet top as well? I’d be upset about that if I’m honest - sitting in a soaked top is so uncomfortable.

@FTEngineerM the ratio for 3 year olds is actually 1:13 as long as there is at least one 'highly' qualified practitioner in the room.
Absolutely ridiculous and frankly unsafe at times, but unfortunately the reality in many nurseries that have two staff to 26 three year olds.

OP I would say it depends on the overall experience you have of the nursery and staff, if this happens every day or only occasionally and the age of your little one. It's nothing to alarming in my opinion.

On the day she had Ken Dodd hair her top was dirty from the food she'd eaten not wet. However, she has had soaked tops on more than one occasion even when I've asked for a bib to be used. Ah well, I'll just have to play it by ear and if it doesn't feel right I'll think about looking elsewhere.

[quote autumnglo]@FTEngineerM the ratio for 3 year olds is actually 1:13 as long as there is at least one 'highly' qualified practitioner in the room.
Absolutely ridiculous and frankly unsafe at times, but unfortunately the reality in many nurseries that have two staff to 26 three year olds.

OP I would say it depends on the overall experience you have of the nursery and staff, if this happens every day or only occasionally and the age of your little one. It's nothing to alarming in my opinion.[/quote]
Ffs. It’s only strictly 1:13 for over 3s that go to a preschool (usually attached to a school) that uses qualified teachers. In most private day nurseries it’s 1:9 for over 3s but in reality if you have one that also takes younger children and babies & trains apprentices the ratio will always be higher than this. For example I have 1:3 in my baby room, 1:2 in my toddler room , and 1:3 in my preschool room.

If your child is coming home spotless from nursery, thats the time to worry that something is wrong and she's not had fun.

@RosyPoesy

This is one of the reasons I didn’t feel comfortable putting my DC in nursery until at least 3 when they could do the basics for themselves. I don’t think nursery workers give kids sufficient attention and care - how can they when they’ve got 30 kids. My friend’s DC has been known to come out of nursery with bite marks and skiddy pants due to not being wiped properly, it’s awful.

Oh bless you. I’m laughing (but not in a mean way) at you being worried about nurseries having classes of 30 children. The ratios are much smaller than that, and start off very small. It’s only once they go to school that the class number near this and to be honest they are usually smaller than that even in secondary school.

Worry not! Your DC will be well supervised and looked after

My DD came out with soup down her top and trousers today.. But she was beaming smiles everywhere..so I was only very mildly irritated.

If you want a bit more of a personal touch a childminder might be better. X

the ratio for 3 year olds is actually 1:13 as long as there is at least one 'highly' qualified practitioner in the room.
Absolutely ridiculous and frankly unsafe at times, but unfortunately the reality in many nurseries that have two staff to 26 three year olds.

Highly qualified or not, I don’t see how it’s possible for one person to keep an eye on 13 three year olds at once?

Sorry, cross posted with others who have since explained the child to staff ratio thing.

However, she has had soaked tops on more than one occasion even when I've asked for a bib to be used.

I don’t think it’s acceptable to leave a child in a soaking wet top personally.

You’d hate to see how my one year old comes home 😂 Its an outdoor nursery that is big on messy play, she has at least one change of clothes everyday. She absolutely loves it though and it offers something that I can’t recreate at home.

Honestly, mucky clothes suggests to me that they've had a fun day. I don't care. I might be a bit bothered about the nose though...

I’d find that unusual.... don’t you send her in with spare clothes? When I collect my dd she’s been put in fresh clothes, clean all over and they style her hair, plaits all sorts. There’s loads of pictures of what she gets up and messy plays a part of it but they clean her up and send her out nicely at pick up...they’re better at hair than me! I send her in with it Unstyled for them to do it 😂

Sorry I had to laugh at "Ken Dodd hair" as well

Definitely agree with keeping nursery clothes and home clothes separate and using clothes you don't mind getting trashed fir nursery.

You could be describing my daughter after nursery! Always comes home looking like she's done a shift down the mine. I just make sure she goes it her scruffiest clothes that I don't mind getting ruined. She has a brilliant time so I can't complain. I don't understand their aversion to bibs or painting aprons though!