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Sat here in tears, my son prefers his dad to me

5 replies

bunny85 · 13/09/2021 22:42

This will probably sound ridiculous, but I can't help it. I stopped breastfeeding my younger son when he was 14 months because he was up all night for the boob. I was so exhausted that my husband started putting him to sleep and sleeping with him all night, and so it continued (he's now 17 months). I've been enjoying full nights sleep every night but I didn't know there would be a price to pay... my son now only want his dad to put him to bed! He would scream and throw himself about if my husband is at home asking for him. When my husband is out, he doesn't have any problem and lets me put him to sleep. However I often notice that even during the day he's attached to him and he adores him. I stay all day with him, he doesn't go to nursery or anything, and I'm just taken for granted, then his dad comes home and he rushes to him... I feel like I failed as a mother a bit, maybe I shouldn't have stopped BF, it seems selfish to give it up just to be able to have a good sleep and now having to lose the precious bond with your child. Any words of wisdom? Thank you and sorry for waffling...

PS he's my second, my older son also is quite a daddy's boy, but not to this extend

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
WillaWeatherspoon · 13/09/2021 22:51

I'm sure it's just a phase OP, both mine have had a phase of wanting Daddy more but I think it's because he's more of a novelty than me because they spend most of their time with me. If they fall down and hurt themselves they still want me over anyone else. You did brilliantly to get to 14 months, that's far longer than most people breastfeed for, and sleep is so important - I don't think you made the wrong decision. I'm certain your bond is still there,and I bet you have loads of fun together during the day. Try not to worry about it and enjoy having a break when DH gets home and looks after DS.

MrsSkylerWhite · 13/09/2021 22:53

If you were out at work all day, he would rush to you. Please try not to overthink. He loves and needs you both.

Hulmeert · 14/09/2021 10:28

This will be a phase.

As hurtful as it is you just need to wait and it'll pass.

Our kid has changed from only wanting mum to only wanting dad multiple times and she's only three!

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Dozer · 14/09/2021 10:29

It’s not selfish to need sleep, it’s vital for your health.

bunny85 · 14/09/2021 20:23

Thank you for all of the replies. I think I have probably overreacted a bit... Yesterday he threw a tantrum wanting his dad, but tonight just now I've put him to bed myself with no fuss whatsoever, even though my husband was in the other room putting our older child to bed. I've decided to start taking turns with him and get back into routine of putting the little one to bed. I generally tend to overthink and overreact and last night I even stayed up all night and couldn't sleep thinking that he doesn't love me enough or that I shouldn't have stopped BF so soon. Tonight things look brighter Smile

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