4 month old … please help

[Elll29]

Hello,

I have a 4 month old who just will not sleep. It’s a constant battle and if he does nap he wakes up bang on 30 minutes every time literally bang on! Then it’s like a 3 hour wrestling match to get him to bed and it’s always way after 10 o’clock. I do a bath, bottle etc every night but nope not happening he just cries! Everything online says for his age he should be in bed sleeping by half 7 like is that actually real 😳😂 what am I doing wrong 🙈. Guess I’m just hoping there is others like this to make me feel better 😂.

Solidarity, it’s so tough! Has this started recently? There is a 4 month sleep regression which affected my baby for sure. How many total hours of daytime naps? How often and when is the last nap before the bedtime routine? My baby is 18 weeks and can only manage 2 hours awake before he needs a nap otherwise gets very overtime and is impossible to get to sleep! He’s on 3 naps per day and last nap capped at 5pm - he is asleep in bed by 7pm every night. I didn’t sleep train either, just followed the daytime routine from Lucy Wolfe. I found it invaluable as I realised my baby was extremely overtired resulting in a battle every night

Yes the last 3-4 weeks! He can only last 2 hours max as well but only has a 30 minute nap and sometimes he doesn’t nap at all if I miss his time frame! He defos gets himself way overtired but I try everything I’m exhausted. Is your little one still waking for night feeds? Oh I will look her up!!

To be honest with you, 4m sleep regression was nothing short of fucking hell. So ignore anyone who tells you you’re making bad habits, just do what ever you can to get some shut eye. It will end.

I agree with the 4 month sleep regression being hell! Just do what you can and remmeber it's just yet another phase and it'll correct itself!

Just keep doing what you're doing :)

Neither of mine went to sleep at 7 at that age. I either pushed them out in pram or when desperate drove round in the car for naps.
It is hell it does get better. Bollocks to routine because it doesn’t work for all babies

At that age my baby was attached to my boob upstairs all night, if I moved he woke. Don't set yourself unrealistic targets.

Sounds like sleep regression for sure, it’s hell on earth! My baby was waking every 2 hours and wanted 2 feeds overnight. I did contact naps just to try to survive! After this the key for me was to have the baby actually asleep by the 2 hours so I’d bring him upstairs at 1 hours 45 mins mark (1hour 30 mins for the first morning nap) and it made such a difference. I really had no routine until I read the book.

Thanks everyone !! This makes me feel a lot better! It’s when people always say why is he not napping? Why does he just cry ? (Because he’s overtired) I feel like I’m doing something wrong! Night feeds I can deal with it’s the constant battle to get him to nap or back to sleep that’s the killer 😂.

Just had My third. Forgot how hard those early months are - the lack of sleep nearly tipped me over the edge - she's just turned 7 months and we're in a much better place - issue is they can't knit together sleep cycles pre 6(?) months I don't think - or at least it's a challenge so bear with it - I promise it gets easier!!

Sleep regression for sure, also my kids have never been in bed for 7 😂😂 I know some will be but I don't think most are. I think for the moment maybe just go with the later bedtime and take some of the pressure of feeling like you must have a 7pm bedtime.
Also make sure your not waiting until he's too over tired for a nap, sounds mad but if they get too tired they then can't sleep properly. So maybe google the signs of tiredness as there are some that can be quite subtle. Also a 30 min nap isn't too unusual, frustrating but can be normal. How many naps a day does he have, 3? Xx

I know, those comments made me feel like I was doing a shit job. Or the ones like ‘he’ll sleep when he’s ready, why are you always trying to get him to sleep’ or ‘just watch tv with him he’ll go to sleep when he’s ready’

Like I haven’t tried that in the 24 hours there are in a day 😬😬😬😬😬

The only thing that got us out of it, was when we helped him ping sleep cycles by patting his bum at the right time. So weed get him to sleep FINALLY then stay there with him on the bed and wait 40 minutes (that was his usual wake time) and then at 37 minutes start patting his bum gently. He would then wake a little and go back to sleep for another 40 minutes until eventually he would wake himself realise it was fine and then go back to sleep himself. It took weeks though.

Ping = link*

He has 3-4 naps a day 30 minutes long if I’m lucky lol. And they end by 5 but he just will not go to bed for 7. I’m sitting rocking him as we speak! It’s so hard I’m mentally and physically drained. I’ve done every night feed and every nap and bedtime myself as my partner works long hours so I don’t get any time to myself (sounds selfish) but even a pee would be nice! 🙈

@FTEngineerM the comments are horrendous the worst is my own mums … “well you never slept when you were a baby” like how does that help 🙃😂 sick of hearing it now!!! Lol