Not sure what to do with 9 month old

[MauvePinkRose]

I have recently gone back to work after 10 months maternity leave and my baby is 9 months. Once things opened up again I did lots of baby classes, swimming, and lots of walks.

Now I’m struggling. He’s in nursery and I usually collect him at 4. He goes to bed at around 8 (depends when last nap was) and I try to play with toys with him in the evening but he gets increasingly fed up. He wants to stand all the time. I took him to the park in the pram after work but he doesn’t seem to like walks much now - he gets very bored and whingey.

What do others do? Feeling a bit sad about it.

Variable. Some days he sleeps very well and other days he doesn’t. Nights are hit and miss. He generally wakes twice but sometimes once. Nearly always wakes around 2 and it can take a while to get him back in his cot.

A push along walker was brill for my little one at that age- he could stand up with it and start cruising too. I got the vtech one- walking/running now but still likes to push it along.
If he gets antsy indoors - do you have a garden? you could put a soft mat down and let him stand with your hands- point out the things outside etc
My son used to doze off on the way home from nursery and then wake up for a play when we got home.

@MauvePinkRose

Variable. Some days he sleeps very well and other days he doesn’t. Nights are hit and miss. He generally wakes twice but sometimes once. Nearly always wakes around 2 and it can take a while to get him back in his cot.

Does he have set nap times? Regardless of whether he actually sleeps for the set time?

I would be working on getting a proper routine down.

What about a circle of neglect? Or as others call it...a jumperoo

How about a tuff tray? Search early years tuff trays on Pinterest. It might not be your bag but mine loves it and we have it inside and outside. Even if you decide to not have the tray you could steal some of the activity ideas and no them on a table or in the bath if it's messy.

Soon your little one will move on from this annoying can't crawl stage and then be in the annoying can crawl stage. X

No, no set nap times. It tends to go off his wake windows. He wakes between 6 and 7 so first nap is between 9 and 10. Then his next nap is dependent on how long that nap is. So say he goes down for his nap at 930 and wakes at 1045 his next nap will be at 145

It’s pointless having a routine if the baby doesn’t concede to it if I put him down for a nap at 12 but he isn’t tired he won’t sleep.

There are some great ideas here thank you. I think I’ll buy him a push along Walker.

Also you can ask nursery to not let him nap after a certain time so his bedtime can come earlier. I'd hate to parenting at 9pm.

I don’t have to though, as I pick him up at 4 so unless I can squeeze a nap in (rare) he’s definitely ready for bed at 8. He actually went at 7 tonight as his last nap was at 230 so he was shattered.

@MauvePinkRose

No, no set nap times. It tends to go off his wake windows. He wakes between 6 and 7 so first nap is between 9 and 10. Then his next nap is dependent on how long that nap is. So say he goes down for his nap at 930 and wakes at 1045 his next nap will be at 145

It’s pointless having a routine if the baby doesn’t concede to it if I put him down for a nap at 12 but he isn’t tired he won’t sleep.

The whole point of a routine is that they will then 'concede'. Takes a bit of time and work. But always worth it

If it works for you that’s great. It has me on the verge of a nervous breakdown!

Don't get a jumperoo, he's probably too heavy for it now

I'd agree that 8pm seems like a really late bedtime. In all likelihood he's restless and whingy because he's tired. It's not unusual for a 9 month old to wake in the night unfortunately!

I'd suggest playing for an hour (or maybe reading books), the doing a slow but steady wind down to bedtime at 7.

Hi OP, I found this age really tough too. You are not expecting too much to want DC to have a nice evening! It did get better quite quickly - once he could walk he was a lot more relaxed and when he hit 12 months he started to be more absorbed by toys which helped too. 9 months is a funny age.

Things I found worked for us...

I bought a toy box with a kind of padded top (from a charity shop so can't send a link sadly) that was the perfect height for DS to pull up on. I put some toys on top of it and he'd happily stand up and play for a while.

Ditto chubby crayons and paper on the toy box, drawing whilst standing up.

Used sofa cushions to make an obstacle course. My attempt at a home soft play (they were closed due to lockdown at this point).

Mini music makers on YouTube. It's an online music class (again it was lockdown, but I still do these now). When he was tired, DS would sit on my knee and I'd do some singing along and he'd shake a tambourine and giggle.

Visiting pet shop that had rabbits and fish. Maybe one for the weekend rather than after nursery.

It will get better and more fun soon! Good luck!

Thanks so much, I’m glad it isn’t just me who finds this a tricky age! I suppose it’s the transition from baby to toddler.

Water apparently when a baby is cranky just add water! maybe he needs a drink or to splash around in a paddling pool or a bath but works a dream with my one year old

Yea I forgot instruments. My 8 month old loves them especially the mini grand piano. (How very Mumsnet). I'll find a link and maybe there is one on marketplace. But also all the normal shakers and xylophones.

Hape Playful Piano Toy | 18-Key Wooden Mini Musical Instrument Toy, Red https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00DQRV652/ref=cmswwrcppapiglttfabcEG2EK13KXXYRG8ATFE1Q

@MauvePinkRose

Thanks so much, I’m glad it isn’t just me who finds this a tricky age! I suppose it’s the transition from baby to toddler.

Yes exactly that!

Just a thought of when you do take him out, have you tried a little trike? My DD hated the buggy but would happily sit in a trike to go for a walk. Its a hard stage when they can't quite crawl/walk/stand alone yet, they get so grumpy. It'll be over soon, hang on in there!

OP he just sounds frustrated to me to be honest, not bored. He wants to be crawling and walking by himself. My first crawled at 8 months and was an absolute terror at 10 months emptying all of the shelves, cupboards and drawers on repeat, but he was absolutely delighted with himself. My second didn't crawl until 11 months and was definitely more frustrated at that stage as she wanted to be on the move! No particular tips except waiting it out to be honest. He'll crawl soon I bet. P.s. 8pm bedtime sounds fine to me while still napping twice. Mine were the same, then had a 7pm bedtime when they went down to one nap around 13/14 months.

Does he have his main meal at nursery? A friend of mine says that portions in nursery are minuscule so he could be hungry too? And I count eating as a nice activity.

@DisappointingAvocado actually that's a great idea. Having a designated safe cupboard that the can sit and empty whilst I cook tea.

He is crawling but wants to stand and he needs support for this

He isn’t the best eater to be honest - it took a while for him to get the hang of solids and he still only eats mouse sized portions. He is always offered food and milk but regularly refuses.

We do have a trike so will see if he can manage on that.

So on my shopping list are a playpen and a pull up baby Walker and piano. This baby costs me money

Can he stand then when holding onto stuff? How about putting toys on the sofa fo him to stand and play with. The tuff tray is on legs so that would be a good activity table. You can get various sizes depending on how much room you have.

We use ours for sand and water play and all sorts. You can make edible sand by shoving some Cheerios in a blender.