My 1 year old still wants the boob like a newborn... will it ever get better?

[Latinorapida]

My 1 year still wants the boobs loads throughout the day but only for 1 min max at a time... sometimes only 5 seconds which is actually worse because he’s on and then he yanks off and then repeat. Makes me feel like I’m being tugged at all day and that he has no respect for me (I know that’s wrong of me).

He still feeds to sleep for naps and at night. He can fall asleep sometimes in buggy and car seat too which is good I guess.

For bedtime I have to feed him for ages and often rock him at the same time too. Then about 80% of the time he wants to be latched on for the entire night. We cosleep and he feeds about 5 times at night still... often it’s only for 30 seconds so probably a comfort thing.

I would just love to be downstairs with my husband right now eating and watching telly... i’d love to be an adult basically but I have to go to bed when he goes to bed because he senses when I’m not there.

Sometimes I love the closeness and intimacy of feeding. Today it’s making me want to run a mile.

Are these breastfeeding habits common? Will it always be like this?

Thank you x

Stop co-sleeping, do some gentle sleep training. It's just habit for him, he doesn't need it and if it's affecting you then it's not good for either of you.

Yes it will. I would try and work on stopping him from being constantly latched.

At 12 months I feed by toddler all the time and we were cosleeping. We’ve slowly stopped the cosleeping and she has just turned 2 yrs and now tends to only feed before bed and first thing in the morning.

Do you want to stop cosleeping? As that would be key in freeing your boobs overnight.
Would he be amendable to an ‘all gone’ and quick distraction where he can reach your boobs during the daytime?

@MonkeyPuddle

I don’t know if I want to stop cosleeping - he still wakes up loads and the idea of having to get up out of bed and tend to him just sounds exhausting. If he’s in the bed with me I can just sort of feed him in my sleep but sometimes I think that maybe if he wasn’t in the bed with me there would be less wake ups. Once it’s gets to 4am ish he seems to be going on the boob and waking up every half hour... I don’t know why.

Although the frequentfeeds at night are tiring he seems too feed for such small amounts of time during the day and his appetite is really up and down so i often worry he’s not getting enough. So I worry about cutting the night feeds in the event he needs the calories? Am I wrong there ??

Stop allowing him to feed for a minute at a time! Especially during the day.
You are not a sippy cup!
He must be eating food by now? Neither of mine still needed breast milk as a source of real calorie intake.
In your position I’d be working towards only feeding at set points during the day and getting him to take liquids from a cup of some kind.
Then I would be doing some sleep training to get my life back.
What you describe sounds like absolute hell to me and there is no way I could carry on like that BUT I know that there are plenty of women for who it works. You have to figure out where you’re cut off points are!

mine did this at 1yr when she was hungry and a bit ill. I think she didn't like the baby food much or at least didn't eat much of it, but then would feed all night to make up for it.

maybe try to feed the richest, most calorie laden food you can in the day time with less bf in the day so baby gets more nutrition from solid food.

Probably not what you want to hear but I’d be sleep training him. By this age he should be moving out of mummy’s bed, though I appreciate mileages vary on that.

@Latinorapida this sounds like our situation! Earlier (10/11 months) it seemed like feeds were decreasing, but for some reason in the last couple of months baby seems to want more which is not what I was expecting. I feel exactly the same as you about the post 4am slot, but I am now permanently tired and questioning whether we should be pushing for more independent sleep.....

DD did this and it drove me nuts, I put up with it for way too long.

We did sleep training to address the night feeds. Might not be for you but it sorted it for us. A few nights of upset were better than feeling knackered and resentful all day every day. If you don't fancy sleep training, you could try wearing something to bed where your boobs are inaccessible and offering water if he wants to drink in the night.

For daytime feeds I would start only feeding after meals, so if he asks to feed you can say 'not now, we'll have some after lunch' etc. Then he'll probably have a proper feed, right now he is doing it comfort which is fine if you're ok with it, but you're not. DD soon started stroking my earlobes instead and it seemed to do the same job for her! You could try having a cuddle with a blanket or favourite teddy to see if that performs a similar role after a while.

If you make any kind of change, he'll complain to start with then get used to it within a few days, so persevere.