Pm routine, 5yr old, school nights

[ThePoliceOfficer]

I need help with adjusting our evening routine now that DD is going into year 1 (I was WFH last year) because I just can’t see how it will work.

DH finishes work at 5.30pm, by the time he collects DD and travel home is around 6.30pm. I finish work at 6pm and get home around 6.30/6.45pm depending on traffic. Whoever is home first starts dinner. Usually eating by 7pm or just after. DD is a slow eater so can finish anywhere between 7.45/8pm. Then it’s change into pjs and into bed so she should be asleep by half 8 ideally. I don’t even brush her teeth or read a story because I feel like it’s such a late bedtime for a 5 year old anyway, especially when she has school the next day. Any suggestions?

If the feeding at MiL doesnt happen, can she bathe (shower?) before dinner? So one cooks, and the other listens out for her in the bathroom. Then dinner in PJs, teeth and bed.
Homework is going to need to fit in somewhere soon too.

@ThePoliceOfficer I know, when you're in the thick of it and stressed it's hard to see the wood for the trees. My DS never used to eat sandwiches, only ever wanted hot meals as a toddler which was a nightmare for doing pack lunches for going to the child minder! I ended up doing what I suggested earlier - tubs of bolognese or mild chicken curry for the childminder to warm up. Then he'd just have some toast (cold bread no, warm toast yes - it was infuriating!) fruit and yoghurt when he got home before bedtime.

My 5 yr old started school last week, we are in Scotland. He finishes school at 3 so afternoons generally are home change and play, 5.30/45 dinner, 6.30 bath and light out about 7. Once homework starts some play will have to go.

He's always been had an early bedtime he choose it. And is usually awake anytime between 5.30 and 6.30 am.

Definitely get MIL to feed her, even if you provide something to heat up. Can MIL also bring her to yours straight after school? Would save the late bed time.

Why can't MIL feed her? Why can't MIL look after her at your house after school?

I'm astounded that she goes from school lunch time til 7pm with no food. Does MIL honestly not feed her? Surely once a week dh could drop a loaf of bread, some ham, cucumber and a bag if oranges and theres an easy weekday dinner for dd to have around 5

MIL does not drive so we offered for her to have her at our house (they have their own keys to our house) but she always says she prefers to go home. She travels an hour here by bus and back! One of those ‘set in their ways’ types.

She does feed DD round hers but it’s usually snacky things. I trust her with DD (obviously) but she’s just very soft with her and I know if DD kicked up a fuss about eating her dinner she’d let her get away with it and think we could sort her out later iyswim. Think I will either prep food and drop it round or just do her a quick something when she’s home (dunno why this last option is making me feel guilty)

Just get dh to bring her a packed lunch (either he takes it to work or MIL makes it from stuff he buys her) and she can have that in the car.

The guilt at that will he replaced by jusg being able to spend some nice time together in that hour at home.