Haircuts

[Expecttheexpected5020]

I've just spent all afternoon trying to get my twins to have their hair cut. I've tried all the tricks in existence throughout the summer and this afternoon I was determined it'd get done but alas no. They've only just turned 4 and I can't bear the thought of them turning up to school for the first time next week with their hair looking so unkempt - I'm worried other parents will judge me. I know I shouldn't give a shit but it's making me feel quite anxious. Not sure what to do. There's also the fact that I feel like they've won and I hope they don't feel the same!

I should have said they're boys - their hair is really long but not in a stylish way. Can't pull off man buns or surfer dude...

Can you get clippers and get someone they really like to use the longest setting on them? In my case my kids would all sit for my brother as he is Mr Fun so they would do anything for him. The first time I took my son the hairdresser was so patient and found ways of getting him to sit still but it was very stop start. I remember as a child getting my hair cut and I just wanted to squirm as the base of my back felt so tickly. Used to hate it. Maybe it's just sensory overload when you are a child.

They're incredibly stubborn and won't seem to relent for anything or anyone. I've tried to bribe them with absolutely everything and there doesn't seem to be a solution. I just feel so defeated.

I got a mobile hairdresser to come over do my sons hair. He just sat and watched Chugginton whilst she did her work! Would they be more compliant at home?

I cut DDs myself while she watches the tv. Might that work?

Mobile hairdresser is a good suggestion by PP. Or try it yourself, I cut my boys hair, as they didn’t like waiting in the barbers, or the itchy hairs down their back when they left for the journey home, they are grown up now, but I still cut their hair, on the one occasion they went to the barbers, it wasn’t cut any better than I did it. If I can do it anyone can. Good luck OP.

Some good ideas here, but also honestly no-one will judge if you dont pull it off. Everyone will be so focused on their own kids.

Unfortunately this afternoon was me trying at home. I've tried scissors and clippers and they tell me they're scared of both. I'm going to see if my mum can get any success with tomorrow I think.

@Expecttheexpected5020

Unfortunately this afternoon was me trying at home. I've tried scissors and clippers and they tell me they're scared of both. I'm going to see if my mum can get any success with tomorrow I think.

Great idea OP, if all else fails call mum! Hoping they have their hair cut tomorrow.

My DS is exactly the same, he's currently sporting a terrible hair cut from when he eventually let me have a quick snip with scissors bribed by a KitKat.

I can only imagine it's significantly worse with two.

Have they seen you/dad have a haircut? I took my nearly 5 year old for her first cut recently, she was nervous but once she realised it was "a treat" she was fine

They say they are scared but are they actually scared? Do you have a male family member who can have his hair cut first so they can see it doesn't hurt?

Also divide and conquer

I took mine to my male hairdresser who handed ds a tablet to watch and then told him to keep very very still or he'd cut his ears off.

Ds has eyes like saucers but it worked

Take them separately to the barber. Often they have childre's chairs and are rewarded with a lolly

My DS is also 4 and has SEN, the past year getting his haircut has been a very stressful nightmare of him screaming, crying, shaking from being scared and hitting out at me and DH - luckily not at the hairdresser! (he was fine before lockdown).
What worked for us last time was showing him videos of people having their haircut and also showing him the scissors at home and pretending to cut each other’s hair making a game of it. DH then took him to the barbers when he had his haircut (we called and spoke to the barbers first to explain how DS behaved during his last haircuts). The barber asked DS if he wanted his done like daddy and he said yes! He only managed to tidy up round his ears and the back before DS started to get upset but it looked so much better and was such huge progress! The barbers were fantastic and made a big fuss of him being such a good boy giving him high fives etc! DS was so proud to show me his hair when he got home! Small steps but in the right direction
He’s due a haircut again now so we’ll see how that goes!

when they are asleep? With dads help? Can he take them to the barbers as a treat

I think the issue here is that you are letting them think it is optional.

As parents, sometimes you have to just crack on with things your dc aren't keen on. Lots of children don't like having their straps on in a car seat for example. Lots don't like having their hair washed or their teeth brushed.
The more you allow them to dictate to you, the harder your life is going to be as they get older.

I'm not commenting on whether they need hair cuts or not - just the fact that you think they need them, but then seem to be offering them a choice.

Just for clarification, my ds HATED having his haircut (and his nails cut) when he was small. Same as dd hated having her hair nit combed, and I'm sure lots of other things I've blanked out.
It's parenting.

Our boy hates having his hair cut. We did have a nice hairdresser he liked but when she changed careers he started being awkward so I started cutting his hair myself. He's not happy about it but he will sit and do as he is told for me, I now do all but our teenager as it saves us money.

@Kite22

I think the issue here is that you are letting them think it is optional.

As parents, sometimes you have to just crack on with things your dc aren't keen on. Lots of children don't like having their straps on in a car seat for example. Lots don't like having their hair washed or their teeth brushed.
The more you allow them to dictate to you, the harder your life is going to be as they get older.

I'm not commenting on whether they need hair cuts or not - just the fact that you think they need them, but then seem to be offering them a choice.

Just for clarification, my ds HATED having his haircut (and his nails cut) when he was small. Same as dd hated having her hair nit combed, and I'm sure lots of other things I've blanked out.
It's parenting.

I understand why it might come across as though I'm giving them the choice but that's not how I'm approaching it with them. I am telling them that they're having a haircut, I'm not asking, but it's not as though I can physically restrain them. If I can't make them sit and have their hair cut I don't see how it will get done, even if I am completely determined to.