If you have children close in age...

[PumpkinKlNG]

Do they fight? My boys 9 and 7 fight all day long, every day, not a day goes by the don’t fight and argue, I’m sick of people saying how lucky it is to have two close together because they can play together! That couldn’t be further from the truth, they never play together they can’t stand each other and the only time they get along is if it’s to gang up on their sister. It’s so bad I’ve had to put them in separate bedrooms (they use to share) and send them to separate holiday clubs!

Total opposite with my two, they're 6 and 7 and get on really well, they play together and entertain one another. I pray it continues but am assured by parents of older dc that it won't!

Wow I wish that was the case. My mum says it’s normal but honestly I’m struggling to think this level of fighting is normal as I don’t see other kids fighting like them.

Mine fight but they play together way more than they fight, luckily. Unless one is tired or ill.

If they don’t play together then how do the fights begin? As with mine it’s usually a disagreement over what they are playing.

They deliberately wind one another up

I know mine are still young but I have a 4 and 2 year old. My two year old acts a lot older than only 2 and they fight aaallllll the time. Always taking things off one another. Always tittle tattling. I can't bear the thought of them being 7 and 9 and still being the same 🥵

5 and 7 and get on well and play well but also fight and bicker- depends on the weather seemingly.

I've 2 girls 20 months and a 4yrs old. They fight all the time and it's getting worse on a daily basis. I actually said my mum the other day is this normal so young. Did we fight (me and my siblings) when we were so young. She's said not at this age!

The younger one pulls hair, scratches, grabs and bites 🙈 The elder one mainly pushes her over (especially when my back is turned) I've recently caught her quite a few times. She's only "sorry" coz she got caught. The little one is bad to her but she can't be pushing her over. Sometimes it's provoked other time msg I think she just sees opportunity to clatter her.

I dread to think what they r gonny be like as they get older. There's now also the fighting over toys that has started too.

They also love each other to bits and love being naughty together. I just wasn't expecting physical fights at this age 🙈

I think that's kinda normal with the same gender.

My 2 nephews are the exact same. Yet miss each other when they spend a day apart.

I have one of each, close in age, and they only squabble once or twice a day. The rest of the time they're thick as thieves.

But then they say kids of opposite genders piss each other off as teenagers so perhaps that phase will come!

I have two girls now 12 and 10 who have been best friends for years. Except when they are worst enemies. Nothing in between ever. It's either magical when they're together or like trying separate feral coyotes

My mum seems to think it will be much worse when they are teenagers 🤦‍♀️

Our 10 & 9 year olds are like that too, boy girl though so never shared a room. They're much better with other siblings though.

10 and 8 and 5 year old. They get on well most of the time but know how to wind each other up when they are in that kind of mood. They are home ed so spent the majority of time together but I don’t know if that makes a difference!

17 and 18 year olds don’t get on at all. Early right now though they have learnt to avoid each other.

My eldest two are 13 months apart and never fight. The eldest much prefers to fight with DC 3 who is 4 years younger than him 🙄

Are they very similar in character?

I've 2 which are v alike that they clash. But my 3rd is very different to them. So if the 2 that are alike are together, even at the dinner table sometimes, they just bicker

Whereas both of them get on great with the third

Me and my brother who is 18 months younger than me fought the bit out as children. Even into our teens we were physical and he’s much bigger than I am.

We are very close now as adults. Speak every day and I’d walk over hot coals for him in a heartbeat.

No they are really different, they are the opposites

13 month gap, 2 and 3. They argue and fight a lot!

5yo and 7yo boys generally get on well unless one is tired or hungry. They do go through phases off winding each other up but usually when they've had too much of school and activities.
First week off summer hols they needed to chill out and remember how to play with each other.
I spent a lot of time reading up how to get them to play nicely with each other and supervising play when they were young though. Reinforcing the special brother bond. Siblings without rivalry is a good book to read to get some ideas of how to diffuse situations and reset expectations.
I never let either of them physically fight.
I wouldn't tolerate a younger one scratching and biting or the older one pushing or kicking.
Try to treat each child as if they were an only child. So sympathise with the injured party. Biter gets removed to the time out step/chair. Supervise them when they're being ratty.

I have almost 9 year old girls and they get along more than they fight. They’re close and consider themselves best friends but when they fight they fight!

Yes they fight but they also play well together a lot of the time

2 boys, 15 and 16 (12 month age gap)

They don't fight and get on really well and luckily always have

I suspect that's because ds1 is the gentlest, most laid back person ever and ds2 knows that he wouldn't win in a fight!

@Lumpwoody

Me and my brother who is 18 months younger than me fought the bit out as children. Even into our teens we were physical and he’s much bigger than I am.

We are very close now as adults. Speak every day and I’d walk over hot coals for him in a heartbeat.

Exactly the same with my DB - he's one of the first people I go to with any news, good or bad.

I have a boy and girl aged 2 and 3 (11.5 months apart). It’s a combination tbh! Generally they’re really close, call each other their ‘best friends’, cuddle and play together and they share a room. But god they also wind each other up - snatch toys, hit each other, push each other over. DD also deliberately winds DS up by singing or shouting something when she knows it’s annoying him and he’s getting more and more upset. they also tell tales on each other (again mostly DD!) trying to get each other intro trouble sometimes and they often bicker over what to watch on tv (peppa vs Paw Patrol 🤦🏼‍♀️)

So basically I think they can be mega close but also fight constantly. I reckon two boys (or two girls!) are probably more likely to bicker/ fight at that age too, but they’ll hopefully be really good friends when they’re older!

Mine are 3 and 5 and fight ALL THE FUCKING TIME.

It's draining..