Toddlers weight!!!! HELP

[13kitty]

My son is 3 in October. He is 97cm tall and weighs 20kg…..according to the nhs website he is very overweight and too tall !!! He was 7lb9 when he was born and in tiny baby clothes cause he was small. He’s grown steadily and the health visitor has never been concerned. However….I was at the doctors with him last week and she was overly concerned with his height and weight.
He eats a healthy balanced diet, doesn’t eat much meat as he is a picky eater but loves his vegetables especially broccoli and peas and loves fruit too.
He’s in age 2-3 clothes and he doesn’t look overweight…just tall! And he has sturdy rugby legs. He is very active from the moment he wakes up until bed time although I am guilty of still using a buggy sometimes walking to
The shops as he still has a tendency to not want to hold my hand and just try to make a run for it! We also go swimming Every week.
He does have the odd unhealthy snack such as a biscuit (pink wafer) or a wee kinder bar but usually only 2 or 3 times a week.

I had no concerns but this doctor made me feel like I was being a bad neglectful mum and like I’ve ruined my child’s life. Absolutely feeling heartbroken.

Ok so firstly are you and his dad tall? If so then I wouldn’t worry. I knew a giant toddler once but his mum and dad were both over 6’4 so completely normal for him!

Second, it sounds like he is in proportion? As in he is not overweight for his height, just heavier than your average child the same age?

Reading your post my take from it is that the GP is possibly thinking that it may be worth monitoring his growth in case there is some sort of hormone issue that is causing it, especially if you are not tall. It’s always worth keeping an eye on these things, it’s simple to do and will catch anything early.

Can you speak to the GP and ask why she is concerned? Did she give any recommendations or advice?

Of course there’s always the possiblity that he may be overweight and you can’t see it. Does his weight match his height?

20kg is very heavy for a 2 year old, irrespective of height (good evidence that overweight kids grow in height early as well). Can you keep an honest food diary for a couple of weeks? Have a look at portion sizes too, it’s easy to give bigger portions than a 2 year old needs. Do you give plenty of water to drink? And avoid too much milk or other drinks?

Don’t feel bad about it, you’ve got plenty of time to sort things out before it becomes a big problem.

As an aside, you’ll need to ensure he’s in a car seat that harnesses to 25kg (most only go up to 18kg) - it’s not safe to use them above that weight so do check.

What height/build are you both? I've checked my red book and it looks like he's 75th centile for height but off the chart for weight which is why they might be concerned.

My DS is 91st centile has his dad's exact build and looking back on photos did look a bit overweight when he was 1/2 even though he was really active. He's hardly put on any weight since being 3yo and has definitely slimmed down. I'd agree with PP that it's worth a chat with the GP to see what their concerns are.

Plot his weight and height in the red book. Check to see if you can see his ribs clearly when he naked.

Do you have a set of scales at home? Can you double check the weight, because that sounds very off. I think he would be noticeably chubby with those measurements. It's not unknown for mistakes to happen. A friend got a very concerned message about her (skinny, issues with eating) child. We worked out they had written his height down wrong, making him overweight.
If you are certain about him not being visibly overweight, my first step would be to double check the measurements.
My reading of the growth charts (on my phone, so very small) is he is tall, but not worryingly so, but very heavy from the numbers you have given.

Are you sure he’s 20kg? My 6 year old is 20kg…?

My advice would be to ignore. My DS turned 2 in June. He's 91cm tall and 17kg. He's happy and healthy and has been on 99th centile his whole life. There's big babies and adults in the family and he has recently had contact with GP, hospital and a HV. No concerns raised.

If you child eats healthily and stops when they are full then I don't see a problem. Some kids are bigger than others. That's why there are charts.

according to the nhs website he is very overweight and too tall

He's not too tall. The NHS calculator doesn't look at that as kids vary in height due to their genes.

He is overweight so get him moving more. Use a balance bike (make sure it is a light one that you can pick up with one hand if he decides he prefers to run) or a scooter rather than a buggy to get him moving. Also has a PP record what you are feeding him and alter his food.

@Sj595

Are you sure he’s 20kg? My 6 year old is 20kg…?

I was going to say exactly the same. Double check his weight. That doesn't sound right, especially if he isn't visibly overweight.

@13kitty push for blood tests. I thought mine was just big too but it turned out that they had an endocrine malfunction. The excess weight was caused by an advanced bone age. If I hadn’t checked they’d be heading into early puberty. Hope it’s nothing but better safe than sorry.

@Northbynorthbreast this was the same for my nephew too.

OP weighing over 3 stone at 3 is very worrying, my almost 6 year old son by contrast weighs 3st 5lbs. I would push for the blood tests too.

His height is not an issue.

He doesn’t seem too tall? Mine is almost 2 and he’s 92cm, and size 8 feet. (But around 12kg)

20kg seems heavy though. An average car seat is to 18kg for a 4 year old. So I imagine 20kg is more 4-6 year old range.

Does he get much exercise? I read recently that the nhs recommends 1-5 year olds should be active at least 3hrs a day. Mine literally never sits still and outside every moment possible as he hates being inside, but I think it’s probably easy to not get much running around time if they are at nursery, or raining or your busy