Car vs train for long journey with toddler

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We're taking our 16 month old toddler on holiday in the UK for 10 days later this month.

We can either drive to our destination (approximately 8 hours) or get the train, which would take 5.5 hours. We would then hire a car at the other end.

Which option is best with a toddler this age? I'm thinking car for convenience as we can just chuck all our stuff in and go, plus he will nap in the car. But I'm tempted by the train as it's such a long slog of a drive and it means we wouldn't have to stop off anywhere overnight!

I'm not confident driving at night so we'll be travelling during daylight hours.

Any advice?

I'd do car and set off super early. We drive 6 hrs every year and set off at 6. Get everything in the car the night before and have a small bag in front with clothes, toothbrush and breakfast in. Pick child straight out of bed and into the car once you're totally ready to go. Hopefully they'll nod off for a bit longer. We aim for 2 hours driving then stop to get dressed and have breakfast. Back on the road for another 2 hours then stop for lunch and a stretch. Then do the final 2. It's easily doable and light enough of you're nervous about overnight driving.

Are you the only driver or can you do shifts? 8 hours of driving done in 4 blocks of 2 hours with stops/picnic etc and alternating the driving sounds preferable to an hours taxi/train/driving an unfamiliar car in a new place etc, not to mention lugging enough toddler stuff for a week on a train. Not sure I'd bother with an overnight stop either, even if I didn't want to drive it all in once chunk, driving 7-11, stopping at a farm park to explore for a couple of hours and then driving 2-6 seems better than a night in a hotel where none of you are likely to get sleep, plus you always get there too early and it's a v long time to spend in a travelodge (speaking from experience of a drive through France where we decided to break up the journey)

Definitely do car! You don’t need an overnight stopover. I’ve done a 13 hour car/ferry/car trip frequently with babies, toddlers and now older children. After trying it various ways - including train and stopping overnight - I’ve found the easiest option is this…

Pack car the night before
Get up early (4-5am?) and transfer sleepy toddler to car seat.
Drive for a few hours.
Stop for breakfast around 7ish or convenient stoping point.
Drive for another 2-3 hours.
Stop for lunch.
You’ll be there by mid afternoon.

Our trips are the same but we have 5 hours more than you so we end up stopping for dinner and arriving around 10pm.

We’ve tried the train a few times and it was ok when the children were old enough to be entertained for long stretches on iPads and books. But the luggage is still a huge faff. No way would I do a long train journey with a toddler if I had the option of a car.

The idea of starting a holiday by driving at 4am is pretty horrifying!

@MattyGroves

The idea of starting a holiday by driving at 4am is pretty horrifying!

Much less horrifying than the prospect of being stuck in a train carriage for over 5 hours trying to entertain a toddler whilst not pissing off other passengers.

The train sounds stressful unless you can courier all of the stuff separately/hire things while you're there (high chair/travel cot at least - car seat you should probably take your own).

Is he still in the baby car seat or a bigger one? That would be a consideration for me as well. Baby car seat is easy to transport. Toddler one not so much and I wouldn't want to hire - heard too many horror stories.

Why would a car journey necessitate an overnight stay? We only do an overnight stay when the actual driving time is over 12 hours. It's doable in one go otherwise. We tend to drive Germany to UK which is about 10 hours actual driving time. We set off late at night (around 2/3am) and stop at roughly 5am for 30 mins, 8am for an hour or so for breakfast and to miss rush hour, aim for ferry at 10/11 which is another break of an hour or two during which DH tries to get a nap. Then it's only 3-4 hours in the UK itself so 1-2 more stops depending on how we feel and what the traffic is like - UK traffic much worse so can easily stretch into 5-6 hours whereas the traffic on the continent is much more predictable, plus we're doing most driving during night hours when the roads are quiet.

We tend to arrive mid to late afternoon. If we could split the driving we would but I can't drive. DH prefers it to flying, because with all of the getting to and from the airport and waiting around even though the flight is only about 2 hours, it still takes the whole day and when we drive we can do it at our own pace.

I don't think it's that bad. When we fly abroad we often have early starts like that to fit in with cheaper flights! It's just one day, and then you arrive and have the whole afternoon and evening to nap and relax and have an early night if you want. And I am not someone who likes getting up early

@MattyGroves

The idea of starting a holiday by driving at 4am is pretty horrifying!

Ha! True. It sounds horrific, but having tried many different start times and types of transport to the place we always go to on holiday, we found this the least painful option.

I love setting off early! It's super exciting and means we can miss the worst of the traffic. By the time everyone else is rolling out of bed we're nearly there!

Car

But I hate being on a train. Anything more than 2 hours I feel instantly bored. I have to measure out how often I look at my watch.

Surely the cost of a train, taxi for an hour x 2, and hire car is more expensive than a travel lodge/premier inn for a night. I always rather enjoy a stop off at a budget hotel.

You could leave at 3pm, stop for a packed dinner at 5pm, drive for another 2 hours to 7:30 when you stop to brush teeth and get into pjs. Then he'll sleep the rest of the way until you arrive. Or just do a hotel stop off and make it part of the holiday.

51/2 hours sounds like a really long train journey. Would there be a logical break to that?

If the train is the of the sort where you can reserve a table, and the car hire place is very local I think I'd plump for the train. Sods law will ensure that your toddler will be asleep when you need to get off the train, of course, but I think that is far better than sitting in a car going nowhere on the motorway with an overhot overtired toddler. At least you'll have loos, a buffet car/trolley and a gangway so that you can stretch your legs.

I say this as a parent that took our child touring round Australia when she was 15 months.

Plus, if you have to get a taxi to the station you have to plan to arrive nice and early, to give plenty of time to lug all your belongings and find the platform etc. You will also have to book the taxi to come early so you have time for it to be late or for it not to turn up at all and give you 20 mins to call up the cab company and for them to rectify. So you will end up taking way more than a hour. You will also need to carry loads of food, drinks and snack etc.

Car without a doubt. I wouldn’t do any overnight stays though just leave first thing and pootle down stopping off when needed

I really think a lot of this is what you're used to. I actually quite enjoy time on trains with a toddler - it's more stressful with two under 5 but still fine. But we do it all the time. We have also tried long drives but we both find driving quite stressful and our kids are used to engaging with us on journeys so they act up much more in a car than on a train.

So I guess I am saying - if you usually drive everywhere, drive this as well, if you take the train a lot, take the train

Personally I'd do car. Mine had the attention span of a puppy at that age, I'd have been running up and down the carriage the whole time. And so much stuff to lug about!

I agree with others - car and it doesn't have to be an overnighter for an 8 hour drive.

Early start (doesn't have to be 4am), with breaks every 2-3 hrs and you'll be there by late afternoon. Overnight stops with small children are a real pain so best get there in one go.

Personally would go with car.

We both drive so for a long slog like that we'd do half each. Hubby drives 4.5hr commute home from work so is used to it anyway and I'm quite happy doing the same journey without stops too. We'd only be stopping for the kids really as they're a bit fed up after a couple of hours or need the loo/feeding.

Definitely drive. I think you are underestimating the amount of stuff you will need to take on holiday with a toddler. Also, with social distancing, I would imagine it's not easy to get up and walk around on a train (also not safe) and I can't imagine a toddler sitting happily in a train seat for 5.5 hours.

We are going on holiday this weekend - it's also 8 hours away. It's very doable in a day. We have 2 dc (one is a toddler, but have been doing it since our older one was about 15 months). We leave first thing, take a break for snacks running around after 2 hours, then drive, then lunch, last time we stopped and went to a playground and had some ice cream, then more driving, break if needed, and arrived around 5-6pm.

I've done this sort of journey several times with children of that age.
We would spread the journey out and start early. So, for example, have the car packed the night before and then get up and go transfering sleeping toddler into car. If they wake up, they will normally drop back off if leaving at 5am (which should've light in summer).

Drive for 1.5-2 hours and stop for breakfast. Stop somewhere where they can run around (pull off motorway into a town to find park if possible to let off steam). We would stop for around 2 hours and then get going again.

Drive another 2 hours (longer if they tolerate it) and stop for lunch. Another 2 hour stop. This would be your half way point.

Drive around three hours with toddler napping then another stop for an hour.

Drive another hour and stop for dinner. Lots of running around. Maybe stop at another park and stay a while.

Then final slog early evening.

Boom! Done.

On order to keep toddler happy, we played nursery rhymes and would have a sing song for some of the driving while they were awake.

If you get the train, consider getting a family and friends Railcard and buying a ticket for your toddler, discount is good and you will obviously have more space. Organise your belongings so that you can stash luggage/buggy and have what you'll need for the journey to hand.

I always did train at that age as my dc were all nightmares in the car and especially when we only had one child it was easier. Eating meals, reading books, any activity can all be done while your journey progresses. If they don’t do well in the car it could be pure torture for all of you. We always managed to find a car rental that provided a car seat, as taking that would of course be quite challenging. They napped in an ergo carrier during the journey.

Car!

For 10 days you need quite a lot of stuff, especially if self catering. We have an estate car and roof box and its still full - and we no longer have a buggy.

Train is more preferable in many ways. We have done that journey for weekends and it's great. If it wasn't for the luggage then I would say train.

Also, a hire car isn't cheap. And you can get really cheap nights in some hotels. I would break it up but you could do 8 hours drive in a day with a few decent stops thrown in.

Drive. It will be 100 times easier. Just factor in a couple of stops at places with play areas for your child to run around.

You can get tablet holders which go on the back of the seat so a child in the back seat can watch videos in the car for a bit. We used one for a few hours on a 7 hour drive to Cornwall when our DC was that age and it was great...Peppa Pig and Bing on repeat were a small price to pay for the peace and quiet.

They should also sleep for a few hours.

For my dc, I would take the train. There is no random traffic delaying the changing of nappies. All my children slept well in their pushchairs.

When child is sleeping I could also read a book and enjoy the view, instead of stressing driving the car. I find driving stressful lately.

The pushchair could carry few items for you and the person who is not pushing the pushchair can carry the suitcase. If you can't carry a cot, buy a cheap one while you are there. Few months ago Argos were selling some for £20. When you finished with it, you can take it to a charity shop.

The less stuff you take, the less stuff you would need to bring back.

Car!!!
Child dependent obviously

I did with mine
Left in time for nap. He slept 2 hours.
Woke up and we stopped, had lunch and he had a run around.

Back in car. I sat at back and we sang, read and bit of iPad for an hour or so.
Stopped for 15, he had another run.
Back in car.
Fell asleep for 90 mins. Woke up and was fine for an hour just singing and messing about with his activity tray.
Then we pulled over for dinner.
Back in car.
1 hour later… arrival!