Help with anxiety over child's development

[Fredsgirl19]

Hello

Would really love some words of wisdom or encouragement on this tricky subject.
I know we should never compare our babies to others but sometimes it's just impossible not to.

My baby is 9.5 months old but was 6 weeks early so I tend to look at her as 8 months when it comes to development.

She has had some issues with feeding she to Laryngomalacia and tires easily so growth has been slow and she is only 7kg (16lbs) and still fits
In some 3/6months clothing.

Weaning is nothing short of a disaster. She is completely uninterested. Hates purée. Enjoys some finger foods but seems reluctant to bring to mouth and when she does she just seems to bore quite quickly. Does put toys to mouth and hands.

She had no teeth.

She can sit unaided but sometimes topples to the side if she over reaches for a toy.

She rolls both ways and I have seen her roll back to front about 5 times but she rarely does it as she hates to be on her front. If I put her on her tummy she immediately rolls over
To her back. If I continue to put her back on her front she gets frustrated and cries until she is on her back. She enjoys playing in side lying position and reaches for toys but as soon as a toy goes out of reach she gives up. She is nowhere near crawling and seems not that motivated to reach a toy. If she can't get it she doesn't care.

She likes standing but and will weight Bare
On her legs but only if I stand her up and hold her slightly at arms or hips. No where near pulling herself up.

She is smiley and happy and makes lots of noises but no babbling yet.

When I see other babies her age they seem to be so much stronger and interested in the world then she does.

I want to just enjoy her shes literally made my life complete but I just have this niggling feeling that something isn't quite right.

Any advice?

The best thing to do would be to speak to a HV. She sounds perfectly normal to me, but if you have a niggle that something isn't right, talk to someone. That's literally what the HV is there for.

Also, see if you can get a good book (a proper one, not some Instagram nonsense) about child development and read up. Read about how much development varies and what the windows of development are so you know if/when to worry and when it's fine.

She doesn’t sound very far off her milestones to me. My friend’s baby is 9 months old and he doesn’t roll back to front and is nowhere close to crawling, and he seems very developmentally normal to me.

I would speak to your health visitor if you’re worried, but all babies develop at different rates and master things in a different order, so I don’t think you need to be worried at this stage

My son was premature and a bit like that. He suddenly hit a load of milestones in a week or two, walked at 14 months and has been ahead since then, riding a bike without stabilisers aged two, for example. Just wait for the catchup.

Nothing you've said seems out of the ordinary to me. My first and second child net their milestones at completely different times and at 5 and 3 are completely fine. I know it's hard not to worry, especially with your first, but she will get therem talk to your HV for reassurance xx

Honestly she sounds completely normal to me OP. I wouldn’t worry x

I would definitely speak to your health visitor- purely to allay your concerns.

My first did everything pretty early/on time according to the books. My second rolled once and never repeated it, had no teeth till she was 1, didn’t crawl till about a month before she was 1 and was generally just laid back about everything.

She is now 2 and causing chaos!!

Another one saying she sounds normal to me, but to contact the HV for reassurance if you have a niggle. My baby is 8 months and sounds very similar - I'm not at all worried having watched DS and his peers and the wide range of normal there.

Prem mum here, a few months ahead of you. If you ask your HV to come out, they can do the 'ages and stages' questions with you to see whether babe is actually behind or not. If she is, then they can make a plan to help you out. She sounds pretty normal to me but I totally get the anxiety. It is endless and a common response to the trauma of a prem birth. x

I think it is natural to feel anxious, there's always some mum with a baby miles ahead who makes you feel awful.

FWIW, my DD never did crawl. She screamed the place down if I put her on her tummy, and I think she was too tubby to roll around or drag herself along. She just got up and walked when she was ready. Lots of kids don't bother with crawling or tummy time. Not the end of the world.