Attention-seeking in young children…

[TerritorialPissings]

Please let me begin by saying I have two very lovely children (aged 6 and 7); they are fun, have excellent manners and are very well behaved….BUT I am really struggling with their need for me to acknowledge / look at / praise everything they do. I give them lots of attention, but when I’m trying to get on with chores etc, there’s a lot of “look at this slime I’ve made”, “look at this apple I found in the garden”, “Do you like my drawing?”. Whilst I accept that this will of course be inevitable to an extent, I feel they do it excessively. Has anyone any tips with how to deal with this, or things I could say to get them to understand that they sometimes just need to crack on with things without needing my attention / input? I’m finding myself hiding to do chores just so they don’t hassle me relentlessly and I feel terrible for doing so 😢 I wince when I hear them call for me and after the hundredth time, I’m struggling to muster anything more than “hmm mmm” in response to them, which is obviously pretty shit.

This is common, so suspect they are doing it a 'normal' amount. It is hard to deal with, but I used to say 'set a timer for X minutes, I am going to do y, when that goes off we can play z game'.

Also if your response is vague, it will be unsatisfying, so better imo to give some proper attention, then say 'i have to do y now, I can talk in 15 mins' and stick to it.

Also I got mine to help with chores, because even if slower, it kept them busy.

Basically, like cats, if they feel you are disinterested they come to you. As soon as you want them, they go away

Normal I’m afraid. I always try to focus on the fact it’s important to them and I want them to grow up knowing they can share their important things with me. It doesn’t make it any less annoying though!

Honestly the amount of times a day I hear ‘look at this!’

and one of them will literally be jumping over a crack in the pavement or going down the slide in the playground
constant asking for praise for Lego structures or whatever they happen to be doing at the time. With the two I currently look after- it’s totally competitive- they do it all the time with their mum too. It’s a game of who can get the most attention/praise- who is the best- I get constantly hassled to decide whose jump or skip or Lego building is the better one. Could yours be doing that too? I refuse to engage at times, or il say ‘I’m having a quiet five minutes but I can’t wait to see what you’re up to in a bit’ and I heap lots of praise for getting on with playing amongst themselves without drawing me into a competition.

I’ll caveat I’m a nanny and not yet a parent. But it’s not unusual behaviour at all! It’s very common (and annoying)