Struggling to go on

[soddingshattered]

I'm a FTM to a lovely 16 month old boy. I work part time and look after DS the rest of the week. DH works full time and long hours, so isn't around much during the week.

I just find it all so relentless - I'm either working or looking after DS, who seems to be going through a particularly demanding stage, shouting and crying if he doesn't get what he wants right away.

Then there's the constant cooking and cleaning, which I somehow have to fit in on top of everything else. I've recently let the house go a lot because I'm just too tired, but now feel depressed that it's such a state!

We do fun things at weekends, like see friends or take DS somewhere, but honestly I'm so shattered that I would far rather just lie in bed and sleep all afternoon.

In an ideal world I'd give up my job and focus on being a SAHM, but that's not possible financially.

I can't wait until DS is 3 and we can get the 30 free hours at nursery a week, so I will at least have more time on my hands. Then I feel sad that I'm wishing his life away.

Does anyone else feel like this?

It can be relentless. Do you try take him to play groups etc on the days you have him to at least mix & chat with others? Or so you have anyone who could take him the odd hour etc?
Tiredness could be PN depression so try speak to your health visitor

I've started taking him to a weekly playgroup session, but for some reason it tends to be mostly nannies who all seem to know each other really well, so I don't chat much!

Being a sahm is also relentless. Rather than working or looking after your son you would just be working. If you qualify for that free 30 hours does that mean you will qualify for free hours at 2. We didn’t qualify for it so I’m not sure if it’s the same criteria.

I'd recommend trying different ones. I found that some were all nannies and some all mums.

Is there a Facebook group you can ask for play group recommendations on?