8 week old needs to be held 24h

[LaMadrilena]

I'm feeling a bit useless.

DD is 7 weeks old tomorrow. Since we brought her home from hospital (totally healthy, quick vaginal birth), she's hardly been out of my arms. She won't sleep or even lie for a minute in a Moses basket or crib, and will only sleep on her dad's chest if she's already asleep or nearly when I hand her over. She won't go in a sling. She's feeding lots, presumably in part because of the thirst, it's consistently over 35°c here. If she's not on top of me, she just cries and cries and cries. We're co-sleeping, which I didn't want to do, but no choice.

I know she's still v little and this contact is important and nothing to worry about yet, fourth trimester etc, but I do worry a bit.

Firstly, my DH who is waiting on me hand and foot, goes back to work in a couple of weeks, and I'll be alone 9h a day. I go back in October.

Secondly, I'm honestly going mad. My back and arse hurt from sitting down so much, I rarely have a hand free because she needs help to maintain her latch, and I've started to get tired as soon as I'm on my feet for more than 2 minutes, as my body's just not used to it. I was lifting weights till 37 weeks pregnant and in the form of my life, and I'm so sad all the hard work was for nothing. I swear all my muscles are atrophying. We're in a small flat, no outside space, it's too hot to go out during the day, and when it's cooler in the evening the biting flies come out - I've still got a swollen itchy leg and rash from a bite over a week ago. My family are in a different country and I have no friends in this city, so no visits.

Has anyone else had a baby that was so clingy at this stage but improved? Please tell me this will be over soon. I feel like I'm wishing the days away, but I can't cope much longer.

Sorry for the rant

Both my girls were like this. It gets better.

My now 7yo was like this. She was born late June and for various reasons her dad was around all the time til middle of September, so she was around 10 weeks. Things definitely improved then, but looking back potentially that was because I made it change; took her out more, more driving and having her in the buggy. I found once my DH was back at work that having a clear routine helped with the constant holding: up and out and doing swimming lessons, baby massage etc. If we were busy she wasn’t on me wanting milk.

She coslept until she was five though (sorry!) and even now still ends up in our bed quite a bit.

It does improve. Good luck!

Feeling for you, I came on to second Billy but on second reading it sounds like the outdoors is not going to save you. It'll get better, but it's rough. You need to distract yourself through it and somehow dig deep for your sense of humour, and then, eventually, you find you've emerged on the other side. Take care!

Mine was like that too. He was more of a cry baby than his sister. It got better from 9 weeks though. He’s now just over 10 weeks.
Every time I laid him down he would cry and cry. He is such a light sleeper. But slowly he started to chill more and happily stayed awake laying down whereas before he hated it whenever I set him down. It does get better, I just try to put him in his Moses basket or set him down when he’s fast asleep. Although first couple weeks was difficult because he was feeding every 2hrs so I co-slept with him. Now that he’s sleeping better I put him back in his Moses.
I think when you constantly have them on you they get used to it and feel very comfortable.

How long does she sleep for and how often does she feed?

Do you drive? If so is it possible to put her in the car and drive around?

A decade ago, a fisher price baby swing saved our sanity.

This could be me down to the heat and being alone abroad. It does get better I promise. My baby is now 4 months and this last month we've been able to put her down for her morning nap in the crib. She still bedshares with us and does the majority of her naps in an ergobaby carrier. She also likes to be carried around constantly when she's awake

Ours was like this and we effectively worked in shifts. It never got better so, to save our sanity, we did sleep training at 6 months which really helped.

Not saying this will be the case for you but at the very least I’d keep trying the cot, pram, car seat etc just so it doesn’t set in that your arms are the only place to sleep.