Who’s got a 15 month old then?

[Simonsayshaveacuppa]

I’m having one of those days today where I’m questioning everything and just wondering how other kids the same age are getting on. My main questions are:

1. Do you give your 15mo snacks? I never ever have but I keep reading EVERYWHERE that they should have 3 meals plus 2 snacks. DD doesn’t seem to want/need them and she eats absolutely loads at mealtimes, but I’m worried I’m pushing her too long between meals (BF about 06:00, breakfast about 08:30, lunch about 12:30, tea about 18:00, BF before bed). Do you reckon it could do her any harm to go this long between meals?

1. At what times and for how long does your 15mo nap? I’m torn between 1 and 2 naps and how to fit naps around the rest of what we need to do, especially now we’re going out more

1. I’ve been going to some mum groups lately for the first time and I can’t get over how calm and content other little babies are. Sitting or lying calmly or just sleeping peacefully despite all the goings-on around them. I feel like when my DD was younger she was never happy doing the same thing for more than maybe 15 mins, then she would be squirming or whinging for something, and apart from those very early weeks she never voluntarily slept in the day, we had to ‘get’ her to sleep and eventually at 5.5mo do some sleep training to get her to self settle. Do you think this was something I did or just her character? Lord knows I would have been happy to just sit and cuddle with my baby but she never seemed to want that?

1. When is bedtime? Because my partner cooks the tea and works til 17:00 we are struggling to get her to bed before 20:00, but again the ‘right’ time everywhere seems to be 19:00 so I’m feeling guilty about this too?! I don’t mind having her up longer and an hour less to myself, but seems like I might be doing her a disservice somehow

1. How do you get the housework done? I’m only just going back to work and off again for the summer, but even without work I feel like I can’t keep on top of everything?!

Oh whoops that’s quite a lot already sorry! Too much to answer everything but if there’s anything that you fancy picking out and giving your input on please do, I don’t know any mums with toddlers so I have no reference at all! And although I know that comparison is the thief of joy I’m just struggling today to see the wood for the trees.

Watching with interest. My DS sounds the same.

Placemarking! Ill write a proper reply once ive fed my 15mo and put him down for his nap!

I feed my 15 month old dinner on his own, we were keeping him up to eat with us, but he was too tired and it wasn’t working. Between nursery and everything else he’s shattered by 6:30 - 7pm so goes to bed then. We give him a bottle in his cot, he hands it to us and then we leave the room.

We do feed him snacks, he’s really active and really big, so it keeps him happy. If your little ones weight is fine and they’re not asking for food, I wouldn’t worry.

We have one nap per day on nursery days and two on weekends and days with us.

I do housework with my DS, he enjoys “helping” with the washing, hoovering, tidying his toys etc. Anything else I do on my WFH lunch breaks or after bedtime.

@LemonLemonLemon thanks! I’ve thought about doing a separate tea for DD but I’m so crap at cooking I just get totally stumped trying to think of what to make! What sort of stuff do you make for your DS? Or do you make a family meal which you and your OH eat later? I feel like I use up all my ideas at lunchtime! With ‘helping’ with housework, do you mean he sort of stands with you while you hoover or he has a go at pushing? Or do you hold him on your hip or what? How do you get down the stairs with the washing while you’re also keeping an eye on the little one? I would like to get her involved but I can’t visualise how I would do it, I feel like I need my eyes on her and my hands free and there’s a lot of going up and down stairs. She does genuinely help with tidying toys though to be fair. Interesting that you do 1 nap some days and 2 on others, I’m always putting pressure on myself to be ridiculously consistent.

I think 15 months is a difficult age. Mine is now a bit older but I remember this time well.

On snacks - if it's not broke don't fix it, mine both really needed snacks but 3 meals is just fine

On naps - mine transitioned to one nap a day at this age. I do pram naps - activity in the morning, then sandwiches on the go, walk them home in the buggy, park it in the garden. But we don't have a car and therefore walk everywhere, this might not work for you

On housework - I think there are three main ways to get it done: don't and have low standards; outsource and get a cleaner; and putting your kid in front of the TV

On bedtime - 7pm works well for our kids but loads of people I know do 8pm or even later

Try not to feel guilty OP! Just do what works for you and your child

14m old here...

1. We do tend to do meals plus 2 snacks but if your DD eats loads at mealtimes and doesn't seem to want the snack that seems totally fine to me.
2. Down to one nap here- perhaps worth a try?
3. I wouldn't worry at all, it will just be her character! I'd say all the power to her for being so active and independent.
4. Bedtime around 8pm here too and again I wouldn't worry, if something didn't work well for your DD she'd let you know in some way (being visibly overtired etc)
5. Just do it together with her, let her "help" as much as possible or talk or sing to her while doing stuff.

@Simonsayshaveacuppa I used to worry about consistency but he doesn’t seem to mind!

He tries to push the hoover about, but also enjoys just pretending next to me with a spare hoover head! Sometimes on my hip but he’s getting heavy!

Up and down the stairs is tricky, I try and get the washing downstairs while DH home to watch him, but he helps take it in and out of the washer etc.

In nursery he has a big meal at lunch, so nursery days he just has something smaller - beans on toast, omelette, scrambled eggs, quick pasta etc. On days off I sometimes batch cook, other days just do him fish fingers and veg with waffles etc. Whatever suits the day.

I’m much happier since I’ve stopped stressing about routines and consistency etc.

You sound like you’re doing great, try not to worry!

Right im back!

So, I do give snacks. His breakfast is 6.30 and lunch at 11.30, so I give a snack at 9.30ish to tide him over. Then his dinner is at 5.30. Ill then give a pre-bed snack at 6.30 (he sleeps through if hes had that snack). Milk just before bed. Water/very dilute squash throughout the day. He goes down at 7. We dont eat dinner with him. For meals, ill cook big meals for him then batch freeze them. Think fish pie, pasta and veg sauce, veg and lentil soup, chicken stew, etc. Then all I do in the morning is defrost his meals for today. Things ill cook on the day are omlettes or veg to accompany a defrosted meal.

He has one nap a day both at home and at nursery, thats why lunch is at 1130. He'll go down straight after until maybe 2.30/3ish - I dont let him sleep longer than 3.

My son isnt one that would sit down at a baby group either. We do things like go for walks in the woods, go to the beach, go to the park. Things where he can run about.

For housework, I get bits and bobs done here and there. So for example I want to give the bathroom a bit of a clean which ill do in a bit. If ive got stuff to do ill 'give' myself one job a day, just because I dont feel like doing anymore than that!

Disclaimer: mine is only 14 months. But he is DC2 so I've done it once already !

1. Yes I do 3 meals and 2 snacks. Mostly because that's what they do at nursery where both DC attend 4 days a week, so they kind of expect it.

1. About 2 - 2.5 hours in 1 nap starting at midday ish. Very occasionally does 2 naps instead but not often these days.

1. I wouldn't give this any headspace. Comparison is the thief of joy and all that.

1. We start trying around 7 (mostly cos 3 yo DC1 is wrecked by then) but for DC2 it's generally nearer 8 before he actually sleeps

1. Housework mostly occurs when DC are at nursery and I manage to wfh - I do as much as I can in my lunch break. Then DH picks the rest up at the weekend while I amuse DC. We don't do enough though and the house is a bit of a tip.

Mine is a few mo this older. I don’t have set snack times but she will often share snacks with me.
Mine has one nap some days and two on others, it depends when we are doing. Bedtime here is 7 as that gives me a chance to spend some time with my older ones. I stagger bedtimes so they each get some one on one time before bed. Younger ones eat separately, often the previous nights leftovers.
House work I just do whilst she potters about and plays. If I need to go upstairs I just pop her in a playpen.

14 month old. 2 days per week at nursery.

1. We are trying to offer a regular snack - we never used to, but he’s been keen at nursery. It often slips my mind though or I’ll offer a breastfeed for a sit down…

1. We are also in the ‘1 nap isn’t enough but 2 naps is too much’ camp. In childcare he has 1 nap straight after lunch for anything ranging from 1.25-2.25h. At home we mostly still do 2 to catch up. Maybe 30-45 mins at 10:00 and 1.25-1.5h at 14:00.

1. Temperament temperament temperament. I am also gobsmacked when I see some 4 or 5 or 6 months old now. DS was never, ever like that!

1. Bedtime is theoretically at 19:30 but often slips to more like 19:45. He’s got up every morning at 06:30. There is precisely zero chance of him sleeping 12h at night. 10.5-11 is more realistic (often with a wake up).

1. Everything is split with DH equally. He does a lot of bills and finances. I keep on top of life admin and nursery. We both cook, do the washing up and sort the clothes. We have a cleaner. The house is still often a mess despite feeling like we never stop!

1. We aim for two snacks a day as otherwise it seems like a very long time between meals, but often it's only one snack as I've still not worked out when to fit in lunch (before or after nap?) now we're on one nap days. He still demands a feed at some point during the day so I figure that counts as a second snack!

1. One nap, something like an hour and a half to two hours long at some point around the middle of the day - starting somewhere between 11 and 12.30. I've not got this right though and he NEVER acts tired until suddenly crumbles and I know I've gotten it badly wrong.

1. We go to one baby group and it seems like I've somehow lucked out with the feral child that is constantly on the go, hurling himself around and looking for things while the others play nicely by their mummies. I don't think I did anything wrong, I'm assuming there's got to be one wild child in every bunch and unfortunately I've got him?

1. Bedtime depends on when he wakes from a nap / how quickly I was able to make tea, but it's roughly between 19:00 and 20:00. It was 20:30 last night as I did something wrong and he had a howling fit

1. Housework is done after he's gone to bed, or on his nursery days while I'm wfh and waiting for an email to come through. I tried to get him to "help" with me cleaning the other day and he pulled a pair of my knickers over his head and then ran around cackling before deciding to give them a chew. Not sure what I'll do when I go back to the office...

14 Month old here

Snacks - he usually has snacks. Hasn’t always and has wanted them more recently so give something. Afternoon he gets a beaker of milk also. Otherwise gets bf morning and evening and 3 meals

He eats all meals with with. Times vary depending, but usually dinner is around 6-6.30pm.

He naps once per day, aim for 1pm for 2 hrs (sometimes only naps 1hr). Bedtime is 8pm usually, although it’s now 8.40pm here and I have just put him down as running late due to emergency trip to vets. He didn’t seem that tired tbh and is still awake in cot

Mine is 18 months old now so thinking back to about April.

1. We have always offered snacks - a mid morning snack (often in the buggy when out, eg as an incentive to get into the buggy and leave the playground) and mid afternoon (as his older sibling gets back from school then so I can’t not offer him something as well).

But he is also quite capable of asking for snacks! (Even where he lacks the words.) The other day, he ate a large breakfast, a snack, then asked for a banana (going to the kitchen and pointing at what he wanted), then ate a large lunch. He then ate a small snack in the afternoon and showed very little interest in his dinner. But he is a very clear communicator and I also think toddlers can self-regulate with food. I would certainly offer an afternoon snack as that looks like a long time for a toddler to go without food.

2. Mine had transitioned to one nap by this age but it was awkward as he was often ready quite early and it felt like a long afternoon. I aim to push him on until at least 1130, and prefer to give lunch around 1130-1200 and then do a nap until 1430ish (working around school run timings for sibling). Then dinner around 1645-1700 and bed at 1900. But a few months ago he would sometimes have a very early lunch then nap, or nap and then a very late lunch. I think timings can be tricky at this age.

3. Mine is into everything. He never sits still. Unless it’s for his childminder.

4. Bedtime: 1900 works for us and gives his sibling time with just one of us after he is in bed. He sleeps 1900-0600 on a bad morning, 0645-0700 on a very good one. He wakes in the night/very early morning at least half the nights, usually more like 0530 but can be 0230. If 2000 works for you, don’t change it. All families are different!

5. I can Hoover with him toddling around and “helping”. Anything else bar very light cooking while he’s in the playpen watching TV is a no-no and has to wait until he’s napping or in bed, or the weekend when DH is here to watch him.

My DD is 14.5 months..

1. Very rarely offer snacks. It’s hard to fit them in, plus 3 meals, plus 2 naps (and she still has quite a bit of milk 🙄).. I usually offer a snack if she wakes early from an nap and it’s still a while until dinner!

1. She naps twice a day still. 9.30am until 11am and then 2.30pm until 4pm. Although she’s been taking longer to settle for her naps lately, especially PM nap.

1. Sounds exactly like my DD. She can’t sit still, has no attention span either and always wired.. rarely ever content to sit and play quietly lol.

1. I put her down around 7:30pm but she doesn’t fall asleep until 8pm, sometimes later. She was going to bed at 7pm but as she’s getting older it’s getting later because of her PM nap. Might transition to one nap soon.

1. Mostly when she naps. She does love the hoover though (screeches at it!) so often do that when she’s awake. I wash/dry up when she eats as she refuses to be spoon fed so just leave her to it whilst I wash up.

@vicky1989x I was at that stage with sleep/naps etc just before moving to 1 nap. I can recommend.

Ah thanks so much for this everyone, so interesting to hear about your littluns! I’m thinking I might start doing one snack at about 16:00 and also try to move to one nap ASAP, keep bedtime as it is because it does fit in well for us. I can also start doing more jobs around the house with DD in tow, just need to pick the jobs carefully!

While you’re all here and just out of interest - how are yours all doing with walking and talking? On this I know they’re all different and I’m chilled about it as I know we couldn’t be doing any more, just really curious!

@luvenders your knickers story is amazing!!!

@Letsallscreamatthesistene I think I’ll give it a go soon!

@Simonsayshaveacuppa Walking and talking… my DD is no where near walking and doesn’t say much… she says dada and has recently started saying ball but usually just screeches 😂

Very much walking and running. No recognisable words. He does understand instruction though. So things like 'get your shoes' and 'get a book' he can do.

@Vicky1989x yep, Daddy is the only recognisable word here! I’m like ‘say mummy’ and she looks me straight in the eye and goes ‘DADD—EEEE’- little minx!!! And ohh the screeching, particularly at her bath towel which has a panda hood on it?!

@Letsallscreamatthesistene they sound quite similar, she’s good with instructions and even surprises me sometimes like ‘take the plug out’ in the bath and she actually does it! But when I ask her what the cow says she proudly proclaims that it says ‘rraaarrrrrr’ . Not running as such, and she doesn’t look where she puts her feet so although walking for a bit now she trips up a lot.

Mine was walking pretty early, so he’s been on the go several months now and can walk, run, climb stairs fairly confidently.

Talking wise he doesn’t say anything yet. But understands well ie if you ask him if he wants to go outside he will go and get his shoes. He points at most things he wants.

My DS is 15months. Moved to one nap recently as he was waking up really early which apparently is a sign to make changes and it has helped with this. This week he has been waking up 6:30/6:45 ish nap around 12 (1 hr 20 to over 2 hours depending). Bed at 7. He is a whirlwind and never stops definitely was not the chilled child at baby groups! He walked at 11 months. No real words except for the odd 'Dada' or animal sound. Understands quite a lot though. Sounds like your child is a perfect typical 15month old

Ooh ok thanks @becca3210.. does your DS have his lunch before his nap?

So interesting that none of them seem to be talking, my Health Visitor asked me at 10 months whether my DD was saying ‘3 words with meaning’ and seemed surprised when I said she wasn’t even saying ‘mama’ thankfully have moved now and new HV is a lot more sensible!

Snacks are if and when I think he needs them no strict times. He likes veggie straws and banana or savoury flapjacks/pancakes. I will put washing on and do light house whilst looking after him but any proper cleaning gets done on the weekend