DS1's bedwetting, driving me mad!!!

[Demented]

My DS1 is almost six. He became dry during the night at 3.5 (only had the odd accident, once a month or so) however at about 4.5 he started to wet the bed more regularly, we were not sure what else to do so we started lifting him at about 11pm. Recently I put into action some advice from MN about getting them to drink more during the day as the problem seemed to be getting worse. This week despite lifting him he has wet the bed four times and wet himself (whilst awake) once (said he was too excited). I felt close to breaking point and am ashamed to say shouted at him. We have no washing facilities at the moment (a whole other thread), haven't for two weeks (this should change today), both DS1 and 2 had a sick bug, add that to the wet beds and having to beg, borrow or steal showers all over the place.

This morning I told DS1 he was going to have to wear a nappy to bed tonight, he was understably upset and I feel that this is a huge step backwards. I am going to make an appointment for him with the Dr to rule out an infection, other than that I assume he is too young for any of the other measures they can take.

Has anyone else put their child back into a night nappy after such a long break? My instincts say it's a bad idea but I can't cope with it any longer.

sorry demented I don't have any advice but hope someone will have the experience and be able to help soon.

Also I wanted to bump it to the top of the page for you

Sorry, Demented, I haven't had your experience, but wanted to sympathise. My ds is exactly the same age as yours and became dry at night at the same age. Thinking of him, I know he would be devastated to be put back into a nappy. I can't help but think that it would do damage to his morale and self-esteem that isn't going to help matters in the long run. Get him to the gp as there may well be an infection. Otherwise have you looked here

Sorry, Demented, I haven't had your experience, but wanted to sympathise. My ds is exactly the same age as yours and became dry at night at the same age. Thinking of him, I know he would be devastated to be put back into a nappy. I can't help but think that it would do damage to his morale and self-esteem that isn't going to help matters in the long run. Get him to the gp as there may well be an infection. Otherwise have you looked here ?

Thanks Ponygirl, I had looked at that site before but couldn't see anything that specifically related to a child who had been dry and then started wetting. However I found a link to another site whilst having a look tonight and have found some useful information. It makes me feel a bit better about putting him in a pull-up tonight and has made me realise that even although I am making sure he is drinking plenty because he is at School all day he generally drinks just about nothing all day then I start telling him to drink this, drink that and perhaps it is too late in the day. I read one suggestion from a parent who gives their child a drink to School with them for every break time so I think we may give that a try. His School encourages water drinking during the day but he generally comes out with the bottle still full and I get him to drink it on the way home. I am going to put him in a Pull-up tonight because the sites I visited said that getting him up was useless. Will go to the Dr with him during the week though.

Feel really sad about it. In fact sitting here in tears.

Demented, I have exactly the same problem with my DS (5), and what I would say to you, is don't feel bad about it or stress about it. After about a fortnight of laundry every day, I've decided that I just can't cope with it anymore and he'll have to go back into nappies. But the way I'm going to do it, is carry on lifting, and then after the lifting (when he's asleep) I'll put a nappy on over his jimjams. That way, he won't know he's got a nappy on and if he wakes up and it's dry, hurray, celebration, and if he wakes up and it's wet, no big deal, it's only the pyjama bottoms that need washing, not the sheet and undersheet.

Do you have plenty of waterproof undersheets by the way? They're the single biggest stress-reliever in all this - if you've permanently got a spare (I've got 4!) then it's just so much easier to change the bed. They're £6 each from Matalan or Asda. Well worth it.

Hi no solutions I am afraid just sympathy, I am also having problems with my ds. He is now 4 & 2 mths and has started to wet himself daily and the last 2 days has also pooed himself. I had 6 months of this when training him aged 3 and eventually it sorted itself out. He was dry every night during the summer but when he started school nursery in Sept his night time pull up was soaked and has been ever since. I am sure it is due to stress of starting a new school and also a way of getting attention from me as he told me today if I didn't do 'x' then he wouldn't keep his promise of not wetting himself!!

Has anything happened recently to make your ds unusually stressed if not then it could be due to an infection?

Good luck I would definitely put him back in pullups at night. With my ds it doesn't bother him at all if he wets himself or wears a nappy he is not bothered in the slightest it would be different if this really bothered him though.

Demented just try to keep calm.
The more upset a parent gets the worse the whole situation becomes.

I know how upsetting toileting issues are to cope with believe me.
I have a 5 year old daughter who went from normal pooing when necessary to one who withholds all poo for as long as poss and then will only let it out in her pants.

Basically all these kinds of issues are often regression, maybe because of different circumstances and things happening that have changed or upset them.

Try to just remind yourself that things will change, and in the big picture this is just little and will not last forever.

I try to keep my lid on by thinking this way too, we are not alone by any means, yes, it is damned hard, but it could be a lot lot worse.

Oh Demented honey, I am so sorry this is not going well for you, and causing you so much stress. I can't believe what you are going through without laundry facilities - what a nightmare!

Please don't feel bad about putting him back in pull-ups: I'm sure it's the right decision all round at the moment. I'm just sorry this is getting you down so much.

Hope you get some advice soon from someone who's been there. As you know ds2 (5.5) is also still in nappies, but unlike yours he's never been close to being dry.

Thanks for the support and hugs, I need them tonight, still feeling really . Sympathies to everyone going through similar it is so frustrating.

As far as stressful events in his life go I don't think there is anything too out of the ordinary going on (apart from rennovations but the poor soul has known nothing different his whole life, although perhaps he is more aware of it now he is older and picking up more on the stress it is causing us). He became dry at night to our surprise not long after his wee brother was born and only weeks after moving house, there was no significant relapse immediately after starting nursery but it was during his nursery year that the wetting increased slightly, he started School in August and this caused no increase either until the last few weeks and now it has become ridiculous.

He is not too happy about the pull-up but we asked for his co-operation with extra drinks during the day and stopping drinks at dinner time and have promised that if he has 10 dry nights in a row we will take them back off again.

We only have one waterproof sheet and I can't remember where we bought it but I will look in ASDA and if they don't have them there take a trip to Matalan.

Roisin we are not without clothes washing facilities (thank goodness) its a bathroom we are lacking. When we went on holiday DH asked somebody to rip out the old bathroom and plumb in part of the new bathroom and he was going to arrange for a specialist guy to put the shower in etc, unfortunately the specialist never got back to us and DH forgot about it until we were on our way on holiday. When we got back from holiday the only thing in our bathroom was a toilet, that was over two weeks ago now and at long last we are going to have the privilege of a shower in our own house, hurrah!!!

Demented one other thing - I've just realised you've got no washing facilities still, sorry I thought you'd got that sorted. In that case you've got no choice. You simply can't put yourself under that amount of stress, get him back into nappies either with or without his knowledge, because you need to feel happy too, it's not just about him, it's about you, and

(chant)

Happy mothers make happy children

Honestly, don't feel bad about putting him back into nappies, it's not a step backwards, it's a temporary battening down measure. In the great scheme of things, this is a small blip, and as soon as you've got laundering facilities again, you'll be amazed by how much tougher you'll feel.

I've got laundering facilities, and I feel defeated by it. Two weeks of nappies, and I know I'll be ready to face it again. Give yourself a break.

Sorry posts crossed - alleluia for washing machines!

It's just us we can't wash! I'm paranoid about him ponging of pee!

Just realised that makes us sound like we haven't washed for over two weeks . We have been making very good use of the leisure centre facilities but it has been very time consuming and not always very practical. Dove wipes and baby wipes have been very handy too.

I remember years ago not having a shower or bath for three months. Had to go swimming every day, just to get a wash. Boy, was I fit!

LOL! The first week we were without the shower I did 6 fitness classes and took DS2 swimming twice. No wonder I'm cranky this week!

my DD did the same was dry at night then started wetting, there is a medicine you can get but it only works on kids who have been dry at night, it didnt work for my DD who is now 10 and still wets 3/4 times a week, it will be different for you mt DD has autism and learning difficulties too so its a different ball game and is possibly a little routine she has set herself, we use disposable sheet things like pampers care mats but we get them from a disabilty place so much cheaper

Demented, I remember as a child going through nights and nights of wetting the bed - I have a tendency to sleepwalk, and I think this might be related, as I used to dream vividly that I'd got up, gone to the toilet, and then would wet the bed as in my dream I would dream I was on the toilet. This happened for weeks on end - don't know if it was stress related at all or not - could well have been, as parents were going through difficult phase at the time, and had 2 year old brother! I remember my mum being really cross about it, and trying to hide it from her. But I sorted it out firstly by setting an alarm clock under the pillow for the time it tended to happen (about 2 oclock), and making sure I got up to the loo then. And also (and I have to confess I still do this today!), before doing a wee saying to myself 'Am I awake? Am I awake?' And pinching myself to really really ensure I was.

It may be something completely different in your case, but might be worth asking him what happens when he wets the bed. Hope things improve soon!

Thanks for your experiences. Tortoiseshell unfortunately when he wakes up in the morning he doesn't even know he's wet himself, he happily lies in the wet bed all night if nobody notices.

Last night however he had a dry night and is quite chuffed with himself. Don't know if it relates to yesterday being Saturday and he had loads to drink because he was at home. Only problem is that he said the Pull-up was noisy and uncomfortable.

Oh and we have a working shower today, hurrah!

How's it going?

And are you still enjoying your 'new' shower?!

I don't know if this will be of help to anyone, but my son was pretty slow to potty train (wee wise) and was still having accidents during the day when he started school. He grew out of that but was still wetting at night, it went in phases but at his worst he was wetting 5 nights out of 7. We followed all the advice about encouraging him to drink lots during the day,restricting fizzy drinks etc.
Then one health visitor mentioned resticting blackcurrant and milk. Guess what well known blackcurrant drink my some had been drinking since he was a toddler ? Thats right the one that is meant to be kind to their teeth and much healthier than all the other (much cheaper) squashes ! After two weeks without R**, my 7 year old son had his first full week of dry nights. And 9 months on he has only had 3 accidents since then.
I have saved so much time & money, no more washing bedding every day,no more showers twice a day for my son, no more pampers care mats and no more R**. But the best thing has been seeing my son's confidence soar.

Just a quick update on this. I have been sending DS1 to School with a small drink for morning and afternoon break (pure apple diluted 50/50 with water) and the night wetting has been getting better and better to the point that he has had 9 dry nights in a row (promised him we would ditch the pull-ups after 10 dry nights, hope I've not jinxed him now). However the School has commented on the number of times he is visting the toilet during the day and I explained that we were increasing his fluids to improve night-time wetting, the teacher felt it wasn't just a recent development but has been the case with him since starting School so recommended we took him to the Dr. Been to Dr who thinks there is probably nothing wrong but a sample was taken anyway.

Thanks again for all the advice and keeping me calm.