Baby constantly feeding...

[kallia]

My DD is 5 weeks and is constantly breastfeeding. And I mean constantly - up to 35 times a day. Usually she goes for about 20 mins, seems satisfied, but the minute I stop feeding her and go for a cuddle/put her down/put her in a sling she starts hand sucking and rooting for the nipple again, so we start all over again. She feeds about twice an hour. She's constantly sucking and swallowing too - not just dream or comfort feeding. The only thing that seems to satisfy her is a bottle of formula - then she'll happily nap for 3 hours.

This has gone on since birth, I've seen 2 infant feeding specialists who say I'm 'doing everything perfectly', she's latching and sucking well, and just to persevere as the cluster feeding will only last a few days - but it's been going since birth. I've been advised to pump to increase my supply, which I'm doing as much as possible (not much as there's very little time I'm not actively breastfeeding). When I do pump, almost nothing comes out.

Honestly, I really want to stop and just switch to formula, but I do want breastfeeding to work if I can... it's so much more convenient for us. But I'm at the end of my tether with the constant feeding and being trapped in an armchair for 20 hours a day.

Has anyone else experienced this? Any advice, or anyone else I could speak to?

That sounds really tough. Were the feeding people you saw IBCLCs? That’s the gold standard of breastfeeding support. If they weren’t it might be worth getting a private appointment with one (either in person or over zoom) as it does sound like that’s a bit more than normal cluster feeding.

Has your DD been checked for tongue tie? Most health workers aren’t well trained in this but it’s possible if she has one she’s got poor milk transfer which is why she’s so slow / feeds so much? Are you in any pain while feeding?

If you don’t put her down and carry her / wear her in a sling does she still show feeding cues a quickly?

Has she been weighed? How is her nappy output?

Thank you :) yes one was a private IBCLC the other was from the infant feeding team at the hospital where she was born. Both saw her face to face and said her latch & feeding looked really good. They gave a few tips about encouraging her to stay awake/feed well etc. but basically was stuff I was already doing.

She has an appointment with the TT team just to check but neither midwives nor the lactation consultant could find any evidence of tongue tie. No pain, feeding is very comfortable although I'm not convinced she's getting much. When I express I can only get a few drops out (there's no 'spray' or squirt of milk if that makes sense?)

Weight & nappies are good so HV isn't worried, but I think that's only because I'm supplementing.

I just feel so bad my milk can't fill her up!

I had this with ds2 who is now almost 7 months. I fed on demand and the first 4 months we were feeding all the time. It was exhausting but I just kept going as it seemed to solve all of ds2 issues and he was a very happy little one. I'm not saying my way is right (I had a very different experience with ds1) but I am saying it gets better. I still feed on demand but he seems so much more secure, wants to explore and is enjoying solids so the constant feeding has become less frequent.

I wonder if you could do a weighted feed? You need proper baby scales not home scales but see how much she is actually taking? Your health visitor might be able to help you with that?

It won’t be that your milk can’t fill her up, it’s way more likely to do with how much / how fast (or slow) she’s taking it.

If it helps I’ve never felt a let down and never been able to express more than 2 drops but I still bf my 1 yo and never used any formula so not being able to express doesn’t mean there’s no milk there!

Tongue tie can be really hard to spot and most hvs and midwifes have no real training in it. Hopefully the TT team can confirm for you.

Have you tried breast compressions whilst she’s feeding? It helps squeeze extra milk into her mouth and might speed her up a bit.

I managed to feed in the sling a few times but never really persevered with it because my DD was quite a quick eater but I know that’s really helped some of my friends.

As you’re supplementing you might want to read Mixed Up by Lucy Ruddle. It’s a book on combi feeding and she’s an IBCLC so there will be plenty about how to protect your supply etc whilst you figure it out (or how to combi feed long term if you decide that’s what you want).

@youaresunshine that's reassuring to know thank you! Can I ask if/how you managed to sleep or do anything the first 4 months? I can only sleep whilst she's feeding at the moment in 20-30 min snatches and can't go out as she needs constant feeding. It's hard to even find time to do a nappy change.

@SamanthaVimes thank you for the recommendation. I do want to try a weighted feed but haven't had one - I'd love to know how much she's getting! I do breast compressions most feeds but don't know how much of a difference it makes.

Honestly this happened to me and it nearly broke me. I was feeding 20 hours a day. My milk actually dried up. I wish I had given mixed feeding a go as I think I would have been able to recover between feeds and probably would have been much better all together.

If you make her go a bit longer between feeds what happens? So for example if she feeds until she comes off the boob naturally so you know she's satisfied, and then you put her in the sling and head out for a walk for an hour? Will she scream her head off, or fall asleep and not demand a feed in that hour?

@linerforlife I tried this as recommended by the midwife as they thought she was just comfort feeding and wanted to be settled. She cried and sucked her hands the whole time, after a day or so she was screaming constantly and her wet nappies had dropped to 2 per day so I reinstated the feeding on demand, it made the whole house tired and cranky and just wasn't worth the stress!

If she's had a formula feed she's fine though.

Oh bless her. I was going to suggest continuing to feed on demand of course, but I wanted to just double check if her chomping her hands was 100% a feeding cue - for my DD it was, but my best friends baby did it just because 🤷🏻‍♀️ so I always thought she was hungry when actually she had just fed!! It does get easier OP, I think up until 8 weeks the demands on your milk are at the highest. But formula isn't poison, so if you want to give yourself a break sometimes there's no harm in giving a bottle. Have you called the La Leche League helpline for advice? I found them super helpful.

This definitely sounds like a milk transfer issue then. Tongue or maybe lip tie? Hopefully the tongue tie team can help. Is the appointment soon?

Have you tried a dummy incase baby just wants to suck?

Babies wanting to feed constantly and being unsettled (especially once breastfeeding is establisbed) when not feeding is a sign of tongue tie. Definitely get it checked.

Also agree with trying a dummy.

But also be kind to yourself. It's hard when you're in the midst of it all, but formula and combi feeding can work really well for some people.

It can be normal I'm afraid. They normally grow out of it by around 4m. It can feel relentless (dc3 is 3m and all ebf). I would say that if o counted individual feeds they would all have been close to 30 a day at 5 weeks.

Things that help me: feeding while they're in the sling, cosleeping and feeding lying down. Make sure you're eating and drinking plenty - if they have to scream for 10mims while you do so then do it - do not diet until at least 3m.

Is there someone who can have the baby for half an hour every day so you can spend some time on your own? I used to sit on the car with a coffee and magazine while DH had ds1&2 in the house

Thanks all. The midwives do agree this isn't normal but can't quite figure out what's wrong. Tongue tie appt isn't for another 3 weeks unfortunately and I don't know if I can keep going that long - I haven't slept for more than 30 mins at a time since she was born 5 weeks ago!

I'm not anti-formula by any means but wasn't prepared for how rubbish I'd feel having to give up breastfeeding :(

I'm determined to make it to 6 weeks at least; if I don't get some improvement (at least down to 20 feeds a day) then I'll can it. Formula makes her happy and me happy, so if that what keeps us both sane then so be it!

Hi, just wondering how you got on with your LO I seem to be in the same boat now! I know he is gaining weight well though but wants to feed constantly! Thanks

She's now 18 months! Formula fed from 6 weeks and still eats like a little monster (no wonder I couldn't keep up) - even as a toddler she'd eat all day if she could! Do what works for you.