WWYD - shouting at DC in park

[stripedino]

This happened a while back, but plays on mind a lot. Very interested to know how others would have dealt with situation.

In park with baby and DC4. On arrival a woman makes conversation with me about my baby and we have polite small talk. She is the Grandma with DC4. She talks a lot about her DGC and some concerns about them being unsocial etc. I don't like talking about kids in front of them, so steer the convo away and gently see if my DC wants to play with other. They play a bit, pushing toys down the slide etc, but no real interest in each other - as is with kids.

45 minutes later on the other side of park DC is playing with friend who arrived, and I am sitting on floor BF baby and talking to friend Dad.

The lady and DGC appear and go over to where they are playing. She is hovering around where DC and friend are playing.

Suddenly out of the blue at top of voice SHOUTS " YOUR KID AIN'T NICE".. completely startled we look over and I say (sitting on floor BF) with shock in my voice, "what, what has happened?" Fwiw have 0 concerns about DC and ability to play etc so was genuinely surprised. She screams " I asked if DC was going to play with my DC and he said no"

So now my back is up and I'm thinking this is ridiculous. My DC and friend standing there in shock, her DGC also lookly deeply uncomfortable.

I said something like ( and loudly and strongly) " it's completely inappropriate to talk like that, you are the adult, speak nicely to all DC to see if they can /what to play, and DC is a very nice child so do not speak like this" she spat back more trite and I put my hand out ( still sitting on floor) and said " I will not engage / shout like this in front of children" and turned away. Friend of DC dad then said " that is completely inappropriate" to which she shouted at him " this is an argument between two women?!?"

We called our DC away and she left, shouting. Tried to calm down but adrenaline was pumping, and Id love to know, what others would have done/would do if that happened to them?

I'd have called my dc away and not engaged in the first place. She sounds like she has some mental health difficulties so id just ignore.

Thanks Goldenfan, good point. engaging definitely didn't help at all

I’d probably have responded similarly to you. Sounds like you were assertive and calm.

Ridiculous woman. As pp said she could have issues.

However the children are at this sort of age just learning. They are deciding who they want to play with, what they want to play and should be encouraged to do so. As long as they are not being rude or deliberately mean. If this woman is going to scream like that across the park it is obviously her with the problem. Honestly OP some people are just horrible. Please try to put it/her in a little box (not literally, although) and think no more about it.

I'm not sure what I'd have done in the heat of the moment. I think you handled it better than I would have done.

On reflection though I would have put it down to the woman having mental health problems. She doesn't sound well.

I probably would have just left, I wouldn’t have had a clue what to say or do and would have felt a bit intimidated. Poor child, it must be very frightening to see the person who is looking after you behave in that way.

Like pp, I'd have called my dc over to me and not engaged. Shouting across the park at her probably didn't help the situation.

Thanks all for your views. It was so completely unexpected (particularly as we had spoken before) so it caught me off guard and my reaction was completely instinctive! If happens again ( hope never) I'd do my very best to not engage at all.