Would it be weird to have 13 month old attend nursery 10-4?

[upupawaytoday]

FTM and have no idea if this is common/uncommon. Planning to put 13 month old in nursery and the ones we've seen and liked don't do mornings/afternoons. It's 1 or 2 days minimum and they're open from 8-6. Baby is mainly going to give me some free time to get stuff done as DH works very long hours, and friends and family all tell me their children have come on leaps and bounds since attending nursery. I'm thinking I'd like his morning and first nap to be at home with me which means we wouldn't get there until around 10:30am, and I'll pick him up after his last snack which is around 4:30pm. I imagine most people have their children in from early until late to fit their 9-5 jobs. Would it be strange to ask if I can bring him in so late and I imagine a 4:30pm finish is more common? Or is this unheard of and isn't very practical?

@motogogo

I find it odd to put a child into childcare "to get things done" under 3. Just take them with you! Obviously people have to work but otherwise it seems pretty selfish to have children only to leave them so you can do what???

She's not leaving them in the cupboard. She's paying for them to go and have new experiences a few days a week

@Elune

Also why shouldn't a SAHM have a few hours to themselves if they can afford it? Is there something terrible about taking time for self-care or just because you want a few child-free hours to do whatever it is you want to? Is it only allowed to put your child into nursery if you do something unenjoyable with your time? Screw that

I'm sure someone can come along to chastise op for sponging off her DH to sit around the house doing nothing whilst he's working his fingers to the bone paying for their child to be dumped with strangers for hours on end 🙄

God I'd love to afford 1 day of childcare

God I'd love to afford 1 day of childcare

Me too!!!

@peaches35

God I'd love to afford 1 day of childcare

Me too!!!

How many kids do you have? Maybe we could trade?? I'll put my 19 month twins on the train to you on a Monday and you can send yours over on a Thursday

If the things you need to get done are housework, then I’d use the money to pay for a cleaner rather than a nursery.

I'd discuss it with the nursery. The one I work at don't mind the odd day with unusual hours, but as others have said it's harder for us to plan our day (walk to the pond etc) if we are having to factor around a child coming/leaving midway through a session

@Corinna there are some jobs a cleaner isnt going to do that you can't easily do with a 13 month old underfoot. I have a DH who works long hours for part of the year, 6 days a week. So I fully appreciate the desire to have a solid block of time to power through household tasks so that family time can be enjoyed, in the rare moments we grab time together, and to make my life less exhausting.

Anyway to answer the OP's actual question, yes it could be a bit weird dropping off at 10am, as the other kids will be settled in activities. But ask the nursery and get their opinion. If you are paying for the whole day you may as well make the most of it, and go for 9 to 5

Check with the nursery. We usually drop off around half 9, sometimes 10ish and it hasn’t been a problem.

@motogogo

I find it odd to put a child into childcare "to get things done" under 3. Just take them with you! Obviously people have to work but otherwise it seems pretty selfish to have children only to leave them so you can do what???

Oh do one. You sound awful.

OP it really depends on the nursery. Mine is very flexible and dont do traditional morning/afternoon sessions. The timings are set up for shift workers, so you can pick up/drop off whenever you need too throughout the day. They have their garden time every morning, so if you want to drop you child off in the middle of that someone just comes to get them and takes them to the garden. If theres a trip they let you know in advance and offer you amended timings so your child can attend.

I dont think the timings you're after are weird at all. One thing I would say though is that dont get too caught up on naps. Nurseries tend to have their own way/routines. In the baby rooms they very much go by the routine of the induvidual baby, but that changes when they move to older rooms.

I think it’s fair enough to be honest, we all need a break. I’d probably go for three mornings or afternoons rather than full days though.

It totally depends what the nursery's policy is. Our requires children to arrive by 9:30 in the morning. Mine do 9:30 to 4 for that reason.

I figured out a nanny would be cheaper for us as we only pay for required hours. At nursery I'd be paying for 7.30 starts and hours I'd never use. I know you're looking for the social aspect of nursery though so maybe a middle ground would be a child minder who offers flexible hours?

Why would you put a baby in nursery when you don’t need to. Just do thing when they nap or with them.

Mumsnet is a bit odd in views towards babies.

They don’t nap as much as all that, especially not at one year plus. And sometimes the nap coincides with things like pushing a pram, driving, then lying on you - you can’t always get things done.

Plus naps are unpredictable. I’ve thought my ds would sleep for an hour and he’s woken after ten minutes. Or I’ve thought he’ll nap for three quarters of an hour and he wakes up four hours later! Hard to plan.

Much better to have some structured time where you know you won’t be disturbed. Nursery or childminder or grandparents or whoever - it’s a bit of a break.

@upupawaytoday

FTM and have no idea if this is common/uncommon. Planning to put 13 month old in nursery and the ones we've seen and liked don't do mornings/afternoons. It's 1 or 2 days minimum and they're open from 8-6. Baby is mainly going to give me some free time to get stuff done as DH works very long hours, and friends and family all tell me their children have come on leaps and bounds since attending nursery. I'm thinking I'd like his morning and first nap to be at home with me which means we wouldn't get there until around 10:30am, and I'll pick him up after his last snack which is around 4:30pm. I imagine most people have their children in from early until late to fit their 9-5 jobs. Would it be strange to ask if I can bring him in so late and I imagine a 4:30pm finish is more common? Or is this unheard of and isn't very practical?

I work in a nursery - you would still have to pay for 8-5 and in some nurseries they may make you pay for breakfast too as many parents forget or can’t feed them in the mornings even when it’s a late start & we don’t allow kids that age to wait for lunch if they’re hungry. But yes, no nursery would have issues with you doing this - just don’t agree anything formally if you are paying for a full day, to allow you more flexibility for early drops / late pickups.

Best to check with the nursery - 10am is activity time at ours and the children are normally in the garden and it takes an age for them to come and collect, and it's distruptive for the other kids. Tbh, I started off thinking I'd do 9-4 but now it's more like 8.30-5.30 because it's nice in the quiet.

@MyDcAreMarvel

Why would you put a baby in nursery when you don’t need to. Just do thing when they nap or with them.

Because she feels like she does need to. That's good enough. Baby isn't being left in the terrapin tank at the zoo, they're playing in a new fun place with new fun people

Pre-Covid you could drop off and collect whenever you wanted, they had an open door policy. Now they’re much more rigid with set times which really don’t suit us. If we had options we could change nurseries but we are quite rural and the other nursery is a 15 mile drive away. Pre-Covid I used to drop DS off at 9ish and collect any time between 3 and half 3. On a Tuesday I’d collect him after lunch. Mine were in childcare because I worked but ignore people here who say you “shouldn’t” be using childcare for a day or two because you’re a SAHM. Do whatever you have to survive!

Gosh. A good nursery can be great for a baby or toddler. And also great for mums. The OP has just had a baby with her for over a year during a pandemic with no break and is just looking for a break and for her her child to have new experiences. I am on mat leave with my baby but my toddler still goes to nursery part time he's 2 because he likes it and I am happier.

In terms of timing- I drop my toddler a little later than most and pick up a little earlier. They are v flexible and say whatever works for us in terms of drop off and pick up but they like to know your plans beforehand rather than just turn as he could be in the middle of an activity. Good luck OP. A good nursery is a great thing for whole family x

10.30 is quite late
Our babies have their dinner at 11.15 and go down for a nap straight away so they won’t really get much out of a 10.30 start
9.30 would be better or 9 if you could manage this
Our babies start to go home any time after 3

Maybe look for a nursery that does mornings and afternoons.
I've been a SAHM for 5 years and it been really tough sometimes. I would of loved to of been able to afford a bit of childcare, a few mornings a week would of done me the world of good, not to mention the benefits for my kids as well.

We're allowed to drop off and pick up whenever.

My 13mo (who loves nursery and goes twice per week) is much more settled when he goes in first thing though - it's as if he knows where he is for the day and adjusts better. The days when I've brought him in closer to 10-10:30, he takes much longer to settle and go play.

Hahaha - just do stuff when they nap…? My 14 month old didn’t get that memo today.

I have 101 things that would be far easier if Ds was in childcare. Today Ds napped once, for 40mins. In that time I did 30 mins important work emails, and went for a wee. Nothing else productive.

Our nursery does either 8-6 or 10-4, so talk them and ask. They should try and keep your naps going

@motogogo

I find it odd to put a child into childcare "to get things done" under 3. Just take them with you! Obviously people have to work but otherwise it seems pretty selfish to have children only to leave them so you can do what???

I wouldn’t put mine in childcare, but the idea it’s easy to get e.g. hoovering, cleaning the bathroom done with toddlers and babies is not my experience.