Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Original poster

Nappy

112 replies

Husbandno4 · 04/07/2021 01:10

My wife and I are disagreeing about when is appropriate to change our new baby’s nappy.
Is it normal to change it every time they have a wee?
Or AIBU for us to change it only when they have a poo. (Currently like every 3 hours, sometimes more frequently than that)
I don’t like the idea of the kid sitting in its own wee? But there is quite absorbent stuff in there so I don’t imagine it’s all that bad.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Hercisback · 04/07/2021 07:07

85p a pack for 20ish.

Minimum 15 changes per day if you're on the every wee schedule for the first 12 weeks that's £60. You'd have a decent start at reusables on that.

amylou8 · 04/07/2021 07:08

After every wee... really! Mine are adult now, but even 20 odd years ago nappies were good enough they they absorbed the wee, you know what they're designed for.

PurBal · 04/07/2021 07:08

I'm intrigued to know if the "rules" are different for reusables...

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

tnetenba · 04/07/2021 07:08

I change immediately after a poo too.

(although as a PP said, not immediately because I've also been caught out by a half done poop too many times)

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 04/07/2021 07:11

Change after every wee, a full wee nappy isn’t comfortable. I wouldn’t change if the baby was sleeping but newborns are awake again quite quickly.

Hercisback · 04/07/2021 07:11

purbal Reusables tend to be as absorbent but they aren't as good at keeping the moisture off the skin. I changed slightly more often in reusables.

girlmom21 · 04/07/2021 07:12

@Hercisback

85p a pack for 20ish.

Minimum 15 changes per day if you're on the every wee schedule for the first 12 weeks that's £60. You'd have a decent start at reusables on that.

If you're changing 20 nappies a day a 'start' on reusables is as good as having 0 reusables.

Hercisback · 04/07/2021 07:14

I've never changed 20 nappies pre day tbf! Reusables saved me money. Used for 2 kids. Spent approx £120 on setting up and saved hundreds and more environmentally friendly too.

Grellbunt · 04/07/2021 07:17

Don't be ridiculous. It's perfectly clear what I meant.

grey12 · 04/07/2021 07:20

OMG what a mess this thread is!!!!!

Diapers are very good nowadays. Your baby won't feel wetness so they won't get a diaper rash. You can buy diapers with wetness indicator (line that turns blue) to help you. Do put your hand in the diaper and check, you'll see it's dry

Urine is STERILE. No bacteria or wtv unless they have a urinary tract infection

Poops definitely need to be changed. Those ARE dirty and because they are liquidy do cause diaper rash. Very important, if your baby has something like diarrhoea, after changing the diaper, make sure you check 5/10min after to see if they did a tiny tiny bit more. It happened with DC1 and she had a horrible rash

Congratulations on your baby

Talkwhilstyouwalk · 04/07/2021 07:28

First baby we changed every time the line went blue on the pampers and got through at least 10 nappies a day. Even at night we'd change a wet nappy or 2 which looking back now was ludicrous....

Second baby we never looked at the line and only changed first thing in the am and after a poo.

The nappies get more absorbent as you go through the sizes so I'd tend to put your baby in a biggest size he or she fits according to weight.

NatalieH2220 · 04/07/2021 07:38

Every 3 hours ish. Change if they poo'd immediately. Doesn't get changed overnight now that he sleeps through but did on the same 3 hourly basis in the early days. Never had nappy rash and his bum is dry to touch when I do change him so changing after every wee is just unnecessary.

Oceanbliss · 04/07/2021 07:42

@Husbandno4 It is clear that different parents have their own way of doing things and beliefs about nappy changing.

But, the most important thing is that you and your wife do what feels right to you both. Don’t force the other into doing or giving in to something that makes them feel uncomfortable even if you think you are right.

Having a baby brings lots of changes and challenges to parents (and siblings) lives. There’s sleep deprivation, recovery from birth, emotions, unknowns, learning curves.

Having a baby can test a relationship between partners.

Disagreeing over whether to change baby’s nappy after every wee and getting into a I’m right, your wrong is going to put additional stress, that you don’t need, on your relationship.

If it is something that your wife feels is very important for baby’s comfort and wellbeing, does it really matter if you don’t agree.

Would it really make it harder on you to just go ok, I respect that it is important to you (even though I don’t think it’s necessary) and just change the baby’s nappy if it’s wet. It won’t harm you or the baby to change the nappy more frequently than you would otherwise if it was just left up to you.

The important thing is that you are a team, who love, respect and support one another.

Mum is recovering from birth and bonding to baby, baby is learning to adjust to being outside of the womb (read about 4th trimester) and bonding with mum and dad, Dad is bonding with baby and adjusting to all the changes and supporting Mum who is still recovering. Both parents are sleep deprived and adjusting to their new lives and how it impacts their relationship.

Go easy on each other, support each other, and communicate with each other.

Just don’t get caught up with disagreements and proving the other parent wrong, or wanting one side to win.

Both parents will have their own parenting style. That’s ok. Find what you both agree on. When you disagree explore compromises that work for both of you. When appropriate give each other the freedom to do things in their own way (unless it disrupts baby’s routine or causes distress for baby or is unsafe etc).

Never undermine each other in front of the children. They will love you both equally, look up to you both equally and it will create anxiety, confusion and behavioural issues if they see either of you undermining the other or overruling the other in front of them.

Becoming parents can make or break a relationship. Work on being a good team, that has each other’s back and loves each other.

Congratulations on your new baby

Thesearmsofmine · 04/07/2021 07:45

Disposable nappies- changed at every feed when tiny and 3-4 hours as they got older. Obviously if they poo you change right away.

Cloth nappies- every couple of hours.

Marmite27 · 04/07/2021 07:45

I thought I was a pretty lax parent, but we always changed nappies when they were wet during the day!

They were changed at night if we noticed they were bulging or soiled.

I can’t believe people don’t change them

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 04/07/2021 07:49

@Talkwhilstyouwalk

First baby we changed every time the line went blue on the pampers and got through at least 10 nappies a day. Even at night we'd change a wet nappy or 2 which looking back now was ludicrous....

Second baby we never looked at the line and only changed first thing in the am and after a poo.

The nappies get more absorbent as you go through the sizes so I'd tend to put your baby in a biggest size he or she fits according to weight.

To be fair the “ludicrous” part was buying pampers…we did too with out first, god love Aldi now!

oblada · 04/07/2021 07:50

Do what works for baby based on any skin irritation and upset behaviour, simples!

I used washable with all mine and changed anything from 3 to 5 times during the day and a couple of times at night IF needed.

GraduallyWatermelon · 04/07/2021 07:53

@grey12

OMG what a mess this thread is!!!!!

Diapers are very good nowadays. Your baby won't feel wetness so they won't get a diaper rash. You can buy diapers with wetness indicator (line that turns blue) to help you. Do put your hand in the diaper and check, you'll see it's dry

Urine is STERILE. No bacteria or wtv unless they have a urinary tract infection

Poops definitely need to be changed. Those ARE dirty and because they are liquidy do cause diaper rash. Very important, if your baby has something like diarrhoea, after changing the diaper, make sure you check 5/10min after to see if they did a tiny tiny bit more. It happened with DC1 and she had a horrible rash

Congratulations on your baby

Urine isn't sterile - that's a misconception. Aside from bacteria on the skin and in the urethra, even in the bladder urine contains low levels of bacteria.

Marmite27 · 04/07/2021 07:53

Oh and with disposables, you can check they’re wet without undressing a baby.

If you pinch a bit of the front of the nappy between your thumb and forefinger, if it feels like gel it needs changing. If it feels like cotton/powder/crunchy, it’s still dry.

BastardMonkfish · 04/07/2021 07:54

@Hercisback

85p a pack for 20ish.

Minimum 15 changes per day if you're on the every wee schedule for the first 12 weeks that's £60. You'd have a decent start at reusables on that.

Yes but then you have to use reusables.

winniesanderson · 04/07/2021 07:57

I used to change mine regularly throughout the day, but definitely not after every wee. When they go to nursery, children are normally changed to a schedule. E.g. 3 hourly (unless obviously needed or they've soiled.) With my own when they're tiny I've tended to do it first thing, before each feed - when finally these settled down!, a quick check if going anywhere, bedtime. And if dirty in-between.

Depending on how much of a heavy wetter a child is, disposable nappies are very absorbent. For many children who sleep through they'll last all night. After hours of wear the skin will still feel dry. Also, urine is sterile, if the nappy isn't dirty it's not reacting with anything to cause nappy rash. I'm not a huge eco warrior, I used a mix of reusables and disposables. But it saddens me to think of all the unnecessary plastic sitting on landfill for up to 500 years. If people are really changing so many times a day.

Those blue indicator lines just seem like a gimmick to sell more nappies to me.

grey12 · 04/07/2021 08:00

@GraduallyWatermelon you're right but apparently the levels are suuuuper low, like much less than tap water. It's pretty fine on a diaper for the 12hr the brands say

eurochick · 04/07/2021 08:01

Mine spent time in nicu to begin with. There they changes the babies before each feed, so every 3-4 hours. It seemed a daft schedule to me as mine invariably had a shit immediately after feeding so ended up with two changes in about 15 minutes. But otherwise the 3-4 hours seemed about right.

fassnk · 04/07/2021 08:05

We fell into a routine of changing DS when he woke up. So after a nap - cuddle, change, feed, playtime. At night we would change him when he woke at the half 10/11 feed time and the 5am ish feed time, again changed first so he then fed back to sleep. At each wakeup in between those times we only fed him as nappy changes would fully wake him up and it was more difficult to settle him. Obviously change immediately if dirty.

Justanticipating · 04/07/2021 08:06

Changing after every wee is excessive. My DD does a tiny wee after I just change her, would you change her again then? I'd be using 20 nappies a day.

100% immediately after every poo. Wees is every 2-3 hours or when it's getting a bit heavy. We change around 5 times a day. Nothing during the night unless she's woken up whingy or won't go back to sleep.

She's 17 months and had 3 minor rashes that went by the next day.

I see it as the same as sanitary towels, they have absorbent stuff in for a reason, would you change with every bit of blood that drops?

Flip

1 2 3 4 5