Dd1 is upset and i'm not sure what do do

[nutcracker]

Dd1 (7 next week) has been doing ballet now for about 2 years. She has a lesson once a week of a saturday morning.
When she started she didn't know anyone but will now quite happily chat away to all of the girlks in her group.
Without wanting to sound big headed she is really really good at it and passed her first exam easily and is due to do her second quite soon. Her teacher said she is an excellant dancer and has the ability to go far.

For this reason, if ever dd has had a week of not wanting to go I have 9 times out of 10, made her. One because she is always fine once she gets there and teo because i pay for the whole term and hate to think i've paid for nothing.
I cannot always easily afford the fees and the layout for costumes etc but always make sure i have the money because she enjoys doing it and is good at it.

About a year ago dd's friend started in her class. They know each other from in and out of school and get on very well. Dd's friend has struggled since she started and her mom had mentioned several times that she felt she was wasting her money. She told me today that her dd will not be going anymore.
I have just told dd and she is very very upset. I told her that there was no need for her to be so upset as it would just go back to the way it was before her friend went.
Dd is now saying she is never going back and has told me to sell her stuff.
She is alot more upset than i thought she would be and tbh i am not quite sure what to do. I don't want to force her to go, but i think if she leaves she may well regret it, and i certainly wouldn't send her back after a break.

I wondered maybe about sending her this week and seeing if her teacher could have a word, what do you think ??

It is only Wednesday nutty. Do you think she may have calmed down a bit by saturday ?

Possibly yeah but tbh i think she thinks that if i let her stop going to ballet , that i will let her go to something else. I have told her that i won't as i cannot afford to shell out for stuff for her to change her mind later.

She's just come downstairs with her ballet bag and emptied it all out on the floor saying 'right throw that away'.

If it was me i would say she must go for a while longer (as you've paid) and see how she feels wbout it a few weeks down the line. Then, if she really feels she doeasn't want to go perhaps you'll have to accept it. She may get used to going without her friend and be fine again.
I did ballet as a child, up to the age of about 14. my teacher who used to take me to and from classes, as we had no transport, announced she was closing up and moving away one week and that was the end of it. I had been getting a bit of stick at school for being a ballet dancer so at the time i wasn't bothered but i have always regretted not carrying on and really wish my mother had been more pushy.

Well thats what i was thinking doziduck, i don't want to whip her out and then have her regret it.

I think you are right, i will insist she goes until xmas and then see how she feels.

Thanks

Fingers crossed she will change her mind.

I had a similar situation with my dd with gym classes. I chivvied her along to go after her friend left (I did feel bad about it though), I also spoke to the teacher who said she was fine during the class, and I did watch her as her and ds were in the same sports hall which was partioned off for gym and football.
She did settle down but then after another six months the same happened and I let her give it up. She doesn't do anything now except Brownies which is a shame, but there were are.

I would go with your gut feeling, let her go a bit longer and see how it goes especially as you have paid in advance.

nutty, is she a bit of a one for the grand gesture when she's upset? You know how some people go all quiet and inward-looking and others have to let it all out? The thing with the bag sounds like that to me; maybe if you quietly put her ballet things out of the way and leave it for this week she will get over her emotional reaction, realise she misses the dancing, and think again.

Hope so - it's so lovely when there is something they really want to do and they are actually good at it too (hasn't happened a lot in my house !) If she still resists next week you could ask the teacher to have a word then?