How do you persuade your 8/9yo to do things?

[howisyourcat]

There are a certain number of things that DD (nearly 9) has to do every week. Nothing out of the ordinary, things like homework, tidying room, music practice or a paid for activity which she wanted to be signed up for.

I am not sure how to get her to do them without a battle.

Me: DD, time for your homework
DD (wails): why do I have to do homework all the time etc etc it's not fair etc
Me: some variation of come on now / you're too old for this behaviour / just sit down as do it and then it'll be done etc
DD: more complaining

With homework I can say in the end, ok, don't do it, explain to your teacher why you haven't and she always ends up doing it. But with other things I am usually having to resort to no screen time until the thing is done, and it is then usually eventually done with lots of huffing and puffing and wasting time. It's a bit draining!

Are there any more positive ways to do this? I do do the occasional reward chart but that wears off quite quickly and she's not massively interested in stickers or mini toys etc anymore!

no homework done = no minecraft at the weekend

I'm glad I'm not alone in my screen time bribery approach...

We do struggle with routine, I think I need to be stricter on when to have play dates as that is what things end up getting discombobulated!

I threaten to totally block Roblox (which is on a heavy screen time limit anyway) - that usually gets me told I've ruined her life (I ruin her life five times before breakfast on an average day anyway) but things get done.

@Iggly

Routine but also don’t expect your child to do something immediately just because it’s popped into your head. Absolute recipe for disaster.

So we’ve tried to stick to things being the same time every week - and it does reduce arguments hugely! Even though it doesn’t always suit me 😂

This. Just because you want something done at a particular time, doesn’t mean it suits them.