Being a SAHM with morning sickness

[nothanksbarb]

I'm 6 weeks pregnant and a SAHM to my 26 month old DD.

I've been fully hit by morning sickness this week and can barely get off the sofa. My hormones are all over the place and I'm also crying a lot and feeling very low. My plan was to go back to work before I fell pregnant again after a miscarriage I had in February, as I feel that nursery/childminder would be really beneficial for my daughter - I can't provide her with the amazing interaction and social life that a nursery would provide her with. But here we are.

We can't afford nursery or a childminder. Maybe at a stretch one day a week, but we would suffer financially and I'm not sure it would be worth it.

Does anyone have any tips for getting through pregnancy with a toddler at home? Im finding it difficult not to be very hard on myself. I just want her to be having fun and learning lots of lovely new things. I'm just existing at the moment.

Thanks in advance for any help

At that age books, jigsaws, play doh, kinetic sand, small world play, watching tv, etc They are all great ways to play that are not too demanding on you.

Hope you feel better soon OP.

Thanks @qualitygirl I've never heard of small world play?

Play with small figures, animals, ppl etc setting up a farm or zoo or a house for example. It all increases vocabulary and recreates scenarios etc you can sit on the floor or couch with a tray and play away...no crazy movement needed. 👍

TV. Put on whatever she wants. Try and keep your feet up, eat something and play later if you can. I'm working from home with a sick toddler today and he will be mainly watching tv.

Do you have any family who can take her for afew hours for you?
If not just whatever distracts her the most, if tv then that’s fine, it’s hard enough as it never mind with morning sickness so don’t worry and just keep things simple and her happy!
I hope it passes for you soon!

I let mine watch a load of TV for a few weeks till I started to feel better! Normal service resumed once I stopped feeling like a was on a boat all the time.

Sorry you are feeling rough.

A large cardboard box from flat back furniture, remove any staples.

Cut open a door and windows and maybe decorate with marker pen.
Put a blanket and a pillow inside and a couple of teddies and
some old shoe boxes for teddy "beds".

Hours of fun while you lie on the sofa!

An interactive dvd or story telling dvd.

A plastic table cloth on the floor with a few small pots and pans, a wooden spoon, a little plastic bowl or jug and dried pasta shapes.

IF morning sickness is really having an impact ask the GP for help. There are loads of medications out there that can help. I found it impossible to deal with dirty nappies and prepping food for my toddler with my second pg so medication really helped.

I'm sorry about your miscarriage too op. Reading your post again, you sound quite isolated.

Is there a friend or a neighbour (substitute granny) around who could help. What about your dp? Could your gp help you?

Btw, this comes later, but it's a good idea to establish a group of mums you know, who live nearby, whose DC go to same nursery (and eventually school) for whom you can do favours in an emergency and vice versa. (But choose carefully so they do reciprocate and it is for emergencies only.)

I was part of a group of four mums like this when my DC were at primary school and the first year or two of secondary. It proved invaluable and no one took advantage. But it was really great knowing that if you were too sick to do the school run one or pick up one day, another mum would step in.

Slightly different to your situation now but worth thinking about for the future.

Thanks so much everyone ❤️

We've been watching tv this morning and I'm trying to make it as interactive as possible - so chatting about what's on the tv and what's happening. An interactive dvd is a great shout.

@Chickenlickeninthepot we had to do a long drive yesterday and it was pure hell on earth. Still recovering. Feeling like I'm on a boat is exactly how I'd describe it.

@Moonshine11 my mum has her one afternoon a week which is amazing, I can slob and not feel guilty. I might try and get my dad to help as well at some point. What's a bit tricky is that I don't want to tell anyone I'm pregnant yet with how everything ended before. I'll have to think something up as to why I need a bit more help with childcare.

@Seeline I'll need to get a bit of confidence up to phone the gp, I get the impression I'll be fobbed off and told to just get on with it and I'm just far too sensitive to be able to cope with that right now

Have you got a midwife yet? They might be able to help with your GP?

Or would your Mum be willing to advocate for you - if she rings when she is with you, you can give permission for her to speak on your behalf. I know how hard feeling sick all the time is - medication could really help.

IF you like singing, I really recommend this YouTube channel. I used to take my DCs to her actual classes and she was brilliant.
sing along

I don't know how helpful this will sound but I honestly found keeping busy helped a lot. The more I sat around feeling sorry for myself the sicker I was. If I put my back into enterainting the toddler it wasn't quite as bad.

Eat constantly little and often, never let yourself get hungry.

FWIW I was sick every single day of the pregnancy with DS2 (age gap exactly 2 years so I had a toddler too) and you do get used to it. Vomiting becomes part of your normal day, like going to the loo. Leave the room, be sick, freshen up, get on with your day.

I had terrible nausea and fatigue in the 1st trimester, I was convinced it was twins again but there's only one. I hate to vomit so willtry my hardest not to no matter how rubbish that makes me feel. It was lockdown so I had all 5 kids to homeschooling too.
I swapped from cooking from scratch to a lot more convenience foods as I couldn't tolerate the smells. I coped better in myself when I was fasted so I held of eating until the afternoons when I'd got everything that needed to be done done. Kids only had cold food for breakfast and dinner so it was tea time when I struggled most. Managed to get 2 weightlifting workouts done a week through it so I did pretty well, I'm used to forcing myself in there so it was mind over matter. Hubby is military so I was on my own most of the time so I have to power through or stuff just doesn't get done. Mine started to ease off from 12wk and was back to feeling fairly well in myself by 16wk, 26+6wk now, get some heartburn and got spd/pgp to annoy me.

Blimey @NewMatress and @Chelyanne, you're both very hardcore. Not sure I'll manage weightlifting but a walk would be a good start I suppose 👍🏻

Just remember that morning sickness is only a phase!!! You won’t feel like this for too much longer. And whilst you feel like you are lying round crying and puking and not doing anything meaningful for your toddler, you are growing her the best gift ever! A person to love and grow up with, to learn with and have all sorts of amazing adventures with. Something that no amount of nursery will ever replace tbh. I had terrible 1st trimesters with my children, and didn’t do an awful lot other than playground, garden, tv during that time BUT that was a tiny amount of time compared with the years of fun and friendship they have had as a threesome growing up together.
Practical advice: until toddler playgroups start up again (the free/cheap kind) think of say 2 activities a day to do the night before. Eg playground and play-doh. Walk to collect leaves and making leaf picture. Then just make sure you do them when you can, and the rest of the time just allow them to watch tv or play about with their toys whilst you relax on sofa. That way you won’t feel guilty and your toddler will have done some good stuff for the day.

Thankyou @Peanutbuttercupisyum, that's such a lovely point.

I spoke to my gp today and was given cyclizine. I will see how I go, feeling so much more hopeful
Though