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My baby is so grumpy and I don’t know how to help.

5 replies

WashingMachine10 · 15/05/2021 14:59

My DS (nearly 11 mo) has been a grumpy, miserable baby since 48h old. He had awful colic for the first 4 months, breastfed near permanently for comfort, wouldn’t sleep unless being walked for miles in the sling, screamed in the car seat/pushchair. Tried omeprazole, I went dairy free - did nothing.

It felt like out of the frying pan into the fire at 5 months. He hasn’t cried so much for the last half year, but the soundtrack to our day is a permanent fuss/whinge/moan. He’s permanently scowling or fussing and only cracks a laugh if he is literally being thrown around the room. He despises being on his tummy and hasn’t got a notion about crawling. He’s desperate to walk, but not that close to doing so. He gets so frustrated with everything - he regularly throws himself face down on the floor and will smack his head and hands down until I get to him. He hates being held unless I’m walking him round outside - a cuddle is his idea of hell! He’s only happy if we are out somewhere busy and stimulating (like the supermarket or the park) and he’s facing outward in the pushchair. We’ve finally been able to start baby sensory and swimming, both of which he seemed to thankfully enjoy. The car journey and getting changed for these activities is pretty torturous though!

He sleeps pretty well (11h usually straight through with 2 pretty decent naps) and he has taken to eating solids well so I don’t think he’s either hungry or tired. Its horrible to write about your baby, but I sense he’s bored, frustrated and angry Sad

My husband and I are both pretty broken by this. I’m totally exhausted and touched out. I’m going back to work in 1.5 months which I quite frankly can’t wait for.

Has anyone experienced this and have any ideas or suggestions how I can help him? Thank you.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
WashingMachine10 · 15/05/2021 16:00

By ‘hates being held’ I should clarify that he fusses to be picked up and walked round, but quickly then fusses to go back down again. Repeat cycle, over and over!

OP posts:
Vicky1989x · 15/05/2021 16:32

Sounds exactly like my DD who is 12 months... I have no advice but I sympathise Sad

cheeseismydownfall · 15/05/2021 17:00

Sounds a lot like my DS1. I mean, I loved him and everything, but jesus christ he was a miserable fucking baby! He was in a permanent state of either crying or about to cry! And he had a lot of odd behaviours, including being utterly horrified by other babies/toddlers (it was very embarrassing).

I took him to the GP at one point because I just couldn't believe there wasn't something wrong. The GP examined him, shrugged, and said "some babies just hate being babies."

He definitely cheered up a lot once he was properly mobile and his language skills improved, and by the time he was a preschooler he was a delight, albeit somewhat sensitive - a trait I can still see glimpses of now.

He's thirteen now and perfectly cheerful, loving and well adjusted!

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skkyelark · 15/05/2021 22:31

I had a high stimulation baby. Some ideas that worked for us (sometimes): If he likes baby sensory and swimming, can you do some sensory and water play at home? I know a fair number of people who did the messy play in the bath, for easy clean up. We did a lot of water play in the garden (a washing up bowl of water with a few toys, nothing complicated). Supervision needed, obviously, but I found just not needing to actively engage for a bit a useful break.

Is he cruising? I used to rearrange furniture slightly to provide cruising courses, or when she was just starting to cruise and mostly cruised in her cot, we could spend 20-30 minutes with her cruising the cot and me having a cup of tea/reading/whatever in the room.

What's outside your windows? Can you set him up with some toys so that he can see people passing on the street or into the garden? Unless you're somewhere very busy, it probably won't be enough on its own, but it might help combined with something else to do (for awhile every time a sparrow moved in the garden, I heard about it).

NuffSaidSam · 15/05/2021 22:56

It's definitely true that some babies don't like being babies. They grow up and cheer up eventually.

It sounds like he's a bit of an extrovert and just needs a lot of stimulation. Can you just get out more? Spend more time in busy places. Have people over. Does he have a swing or jumperoo or similar? Something that gives him a lot of physical feedback. I think the key is probably just being out of the house though, some babies just don't like being indoors!

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