How to help DS

[lightningpeach]

My DS is just 5, he is quite reserved and shy, he has been getting on ok at school but doesn't have a lot of friends. He has a 'best' friend who he has had reciprocal play dates with and I get on well with his mum. In school this best friend has been actively leaving DS out also telling DS he needs to either give him the toy DS has or he will not be his friend any more. I totally understand that they are only 5 and they are finding their own personalities so these things will happen but Im not sure how best to advise DS. So far DS has gone along with what the friend has told him! I don't want him to be pushed around by his friends.
I have tried telling him to say thats not very nice thing for a friend to say or to say no he is playing with whatever toy but I think he's too shy to stand up for himself when it comes to it.
How do I help him?

My DD1 is similar in that she is obsessed with her beat friend. Speak to the teachers they will arrange groups in a way to help him make more friends.

I did raise it with his teacher a while ago and she said she'd keep an eye on it (other kids were calling him names too) but I get the impression this friend is a bit sneaky, DS said the teachers aren't around when he says these things.
I don't know how to help him know when he can stick up for himself, we've talked about what he could say but still comes back with these situations.

Hi @lightningpeach

It's not easy when you think your children are being taken advantage of is it... Especially when they get upset over it. I've found it works to a point to tell my DC the truth and that sometimes children are unkind to each other. Much as I want to present them with a perfect world where nothing bad ever happens, sadly that's not real life. I also try and help them come up with ideas of what they could say back, much as you've said. And horrible as it might sound, sometimes they have to experience it (ideally with support as you're giving) to learn how to deal with it. My way of dealing with life is not my DS's way, and he has to find what works for him ultimately. But I'm there for him every step of the way. I agree with a pp about speaking to the school; though it's so frustrating when you do say something and nothing changes. Could you maybe keep a little record of what he says happens and that would give you more weight in a future potential conversation? Just my rambling opinions