Question - if your DP/ DH works away a lot

[milliec]

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Not got a totally similar story but wanted to bump for you! My DH works long hours and the kids can go 3 or 4 days without seeing him (and so can I too if I go to bed early!)
They don't wake up at night like your DD but I regularly have problems with my two DS's (3.10 and 2.2) with tears and tantrums from missing him.
I think it is therefore quite normal (and sometimes with mine there is an element of 'daddy would be nicer to me than you are' when I discipline them although of course he wouldn't be (he is in fact stricter).
Can't really offer any advice you seem to be doing everything I would do. I am lucky it doesn't affetc the night just our day times.
My DH also expalins to both boys when he will be abesent before he is- ie they know the night before that they won't see daddy for a few days- I think it helps to come from him.
Hope someone with more advice comes along soon.

Dh works away a lot and I've not had your problem - but here's an idea.

Perhaps you could make a calendar showing the days of the week, with stick-on bits that you can move around to show when Daddy is here or not.

Dp could make it with her and it could be their 'special Daddy calendar' or whatever. It could have a large photo of dp on it.

DH worked away a lot (still does, but not quite as much) and we have had everything from squealing excitement to see him through to completely ignoring him when he got home. Not what you are describing, though - for you.

My only "tips" would be - as piglet says, make sure DD knows where Daddy is and when he will be home (DH's travel was international, so we used to look at the map on DS's wall to see where Daddy was this time), and try to arrange for DP to talk to DD before bedtime every night - not easy for him, as she probably isn't very good on the 'phone yet, but reassurance for DD that Daddy still exists even when she can't see him.

Could you get a cheap web-cam & they could have a night night chat before she goes to bed ( sorry this might not fit in with your DP's job/hours)

The calendar idea is good, maybe he & she could add a new drawing to it each week & talk about when he's away & when he comes back. She is probably too young to fully understand but making it a part of her routine & making sure she says goodbye before he goes (even if it upsets her)with the words "Back soon!" might help her settle.

Poor you it's horrible dealing with all this on your own AND not having sleep.

Me and the DC's live in France and DH works in London Monday to Friday and we've been doing this now for 2 years. DS1 was 3 1/2 when we first started and he hated it, would run after the car crying on a Sunday tea time when my husband went back to work. Friday was always Daddy day and a special day to look forward to. TBH both DS1 and DS2 really miss their dad, but he's here every weekend, if there's something special on at school he takes holiday to be here so he tries really hard to be involved in the DC's lives. Daddy always brings an English comic home for the boys on Fridays and I've always got a stash of popcorn or something for when he leaves and we play games to take the DC's mind of it. But it is hard, and I still get DS1 crying in his bed every so often that he misses daddy. We did the move to France for the DC's and they have a fantastic life here but when DS1 gets like that I do wonder. It gets easier all the time, thank goodness for Skype and webcams, DC's chat to their dad every night and they can see him and show him the things they've done at school during the day. It might be worth a thought.

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