BLW tips for easy visit to GPs

[sunflower811]

After all the restrictions we are soon to visit the grandparents for the first time with our 10 mo. My mum is elderly and a bit of a fusspot. She is also critical and she constantly questions and criticises baby led weaning when ever we speak on FaceTime. (I am 40 so was weaned on spoons and jars all the way). My parents live 3hrs away and we are going to spend the day with baby. Any BLW parents have any suggestions about what to do about our baby's meals that day? I expect we will be there for lunch and tea. I don't know whether to take stuff (and if so what) or let baby eat Granny's food. But with the last one, she is quite critical and precious and she might not approve of her throwing food over the side of the high chair in her pristine house, or of the wasted food. I know it's silly, and I know Granny just needs to get over it, but I'm dreading that aspect of the day.

If you BLW what are you doing about visits to family.

No one is going to want food thrown around to be fair That’s not silly.

Baby can have toast or a sandwich, will granny have fruit? Just only hand your baby one small piece at a time so there isn’t waste/food thrown (and supervise so none is dropped).
Bring some yoghurt or food pouches too. No mess then.

I think you are massively overthinking this!

Pack her up a lunchbox, she can try what granny's made and just clean up any mess.

Firstly, take a big plastic sheet (shower curtain works well too) to put under the high chair and to cover the surrounding area, and then it won't matter if any food gets 'dropped'

Secondly, it is quite likely that your little one will not behave as normal - strange place and strange people (I am assuming that with lockdowns, they haven't had much contact with GPs), so blame everything on that.

I would take what you would normally feed your LO for the day. See what Granny serves up, and if it's not suitable, or is a disaster, oyu have something to fall back on - even if it is is fed to baby in the car on the way home

Ignore what your Mum says with a smile and a nod.

Toast for the lunch. Maybe take a spread if your mum won't have any - peanut butter, an avocado to smash, humous etc. And fruit.

Dinner is trickier. The polite and well mannered thing to do would be for baby to have whatever your mum is serving all if you. But depends what it is. Steamed veg would be easy, a pasta dish would also be good. Maybe ask her what will be served?

Otherwise, maybe ask for baby to have a cheese omelette. That's easy. Just add in whatever your mum has.

PS - I baby lead weaned my four children (alongside spoon fed stuff, I'm not precious). I judge food throwing in a so.ilar way to your mum I'm afraid. I'd have "told off" my children any time they did it. While it might be unavoidable that your 10mo accidentally drops food, may be your mum is merely suggesting that if the food is thrown deliberately that you say NO, STOP THAT. This may be all she us expecting?

As for food waste- part and parcel of having children. She'll get used to it. Get a dog, that's the answer to food waste.

To be clear, I didn't mean food throwing as in she literally chucks food. But she drops it over the side after she's taken a bite sometimes. I don't think she realises what she's doing and I think she thinks she's setting it aside for later. If I catch it in time she will eat it! She's not being naughty - she's only just 10 months!

Handing her one piece at a time is a good idea.

Agree toast at lunch, a finger at a time.
But if granny is serving lunch that isn't soup or something. Give her that.

Ask her to stop commenting on what you are feeding your baby!

Put as big a bib on her as possible. If the floor underneath the highchair is carpet then I would probably recommend putting something underneath the high chair like a shower curtain or loads of newspaper at least. If it's not carpet, I don't think there's a need for that as much easier to clean.

At 10m I can't imagine she eats that much quantity wise anyway so I'd just take a few snacks and a pouch/jar for each meal (or something you made in a tub that you could spoon fed). Ask your DM what's planned for the meals to see if there's something suitable for DD, if not then you could take more. I mostly did BLW but if we were out other places sometimes spoon fed if it was convenient, it's not going to suddenly ruin or derail their weaning on the odd occasion.

Once meal is over, pass DD to someone then immediately clean up all her mess from high chair and floor etc. Job done, I'm sure it will be fine, try not to worry and enjoy your day.

@sunflower811

After all the restrictions we are soon to visit the grandparents for the first time with our 10 mo. My mum is elderly and a bit of a fusspot. She is also critical and she constantly questions and criticises baby led weaning when ever we speak on FaceTime. (I am 40 so was weaned on spoons and jars all the way). My parents live 3hrs away and we are going to spend the day with baby. Any BLW parents have any suggestions about what to do about our baby's meals that day? I expect we will be there for lunch and tea. I don't know whether to take stuff (and if so what) or let baby eat Granny's food. But with the last one, she is quite critical and precious and she might not approve of her throwing food over the side of the high chair in her pristine house, or of the wasted food. I know it's silly, and I know Granny just needs to get over it, but I'm dreading that aspect of the day.

If you BLW what are you doing about visits to family.

Same age similar type of mum. I brought a splashmat, his chicco travel highchair, catch all and all in one bib and would feed him pieces of fruit and veg we knew he was comfortable with. Then started to offer him Mum’s food when he asked for it. Mum was fascinated and loved it - called him an amazing eater. DS genuinely loves his food though - he only throws it off the highchair when he’s done.

I agree with taking a mat, we accidentally do blw because DD refuses to be spoon fed anything and clamps her mouth shut if we try and DD does the same, she drops food over the side all the time and manages to get it everywhere. I have a mat for at mine and my mom bought one at hers (which was only £3 from dunelm) and it catches all the mess and can just be wiped down.

Definitely take food, the less messy the better. So for lunch maybe finger sandwiches/crackers, raisins, fruit and for dinner id probably take pasta and then re heat and add cheese and veg. She can’t make too much mess with those.

I wouldn’t take a pouch or jar , your baby isn’t used to it.

Mat for the floor, loads of wipes or flannels and double bib (long sleeve then a pelican one on top).

I'd do something easy for lunch so sandwich, veg sticks & fruit and then check to see what's for dinner and decide whether she'd have some or not. I'd take some pasta or something if it's not suitable. Both GPs here have been impressed by how DS ate following BLW.

Invest in a Labrador and take him with you - zero mess 😀 Good luck, sounds much more stressful than it should be x

Take some pasta with cream cheese and peas ready done in pot to just warm through for dinner. Relatively clean and can just not use if your mums made something else that’s also suitable

Take small sandwich and some fruit/ yogurt for lunch. Bananas get hoovered up here by 12 month old with little mess. You can always let her have some of what your having also, but taking own meals it’s easier if lunch is late or baby naps etc

Thanks, sandwiches a good idea. Pasta with sauce won't work as baby can't use spoon yet. I'll look at travel high chairs and floor mats too.

Pasta with cream cheese can just be picked up with fingers. It’s a light coating, not really a runny sauce

Plain pasta, bits of sliced ham, bits of cheese, baby puffs (they’re just air but fine when you just need to keep them occupied), whatever veg or fruit she likes. Repeat at dinner.

Or personally I’d offer what ever is served, bring towel or shower curtain to cover the floor and clean up after.

I had a big plastic mat I bought from Jojo Maman Bebe for visiting people without wipe-clean floors. We also took the IKEA high chair, bibs and wipes. Do you know what will be served? I would usually just let baby try whatever was served as she could just breastfeed more if she didn't eat any. But I guess that might be stressful for you if your mother is going to be critical so you could pack a lunch box of not too messy things the baby will eat. My in-laws were critical of everything we did when my daughter was a baby and toddler as were my brother and sister in law. Now my MIL actually takes notes of what we do with DD to try with her cousins as she has actually turned very well (including loving her food!).

Try and clean up as you go, it’s amazing how much more off putting someone else’s baby’s food scraps are when you are eating! (And I did blw too so understand where you are coming from and what’s involved ) another family member seemed to think it was an essential part of the process not to clean up anything while we were all eating, and the food mush and chaos for their little one just reigned... I am sure you’ll be much more careful!

I think granny will forgive baby for throwing food, she needs to get a grip if not.
You can get big sheets for under the highchair that catch a lot.

My in-laws in particular were amazed by blw (we did some finger food and some spoon feeding of messier foods for both kids). Apart from concerns about choking, they constantly went on about what good eaters my kids were.

For one day at 10 months I’d just play it by ear mostly. Depends what food you know it’s likely your parents will have. Mine would always have some kind of bread and cheese/ham and some fruit so that’s an easy meal. Or maybe some of whatever they had planned for us to eat, depending on how suitable it is. My mum would happily cook up some plain pasta or scrambled egg for her grandchild, even if it wasn’t what we were eating.

I’d probably take some snacks, but my kids ate constantly. And sometimes they needed to be occupied in the buggy or whatever if meal times didn’t quite match up

It’s also possible your baby will eat nothing/more than normal. If they’re not used to any deviation in the routine they can behave completely differently in a new environment. We’d just give extra milk if they didn’t eat well

Thank you, some great advice here.

she is quite critical and precious and she might not approve of her throwing food over the side of the high chair in her pristine house, or of the wasted food. I know it's silly, and I know Granny just needs to get over it,

Wow. Aren't you the charmer ?
Why should Granny 'just get over it'?
Would it not make more sense for you to take a floor covering as suggested above, or for you to feed her for this one day? Whatever your philosophy about the best way for children to eat 99% of the time, no harm is going to be done doing it differently on one day of her life. Just the same as if you need to feed her out in a restaurant, or in the back seat of the car or 101 other places that aren't suitable to be chucking food around.

@BackforGood a massive to you. If you actually read my posts you'd see my baby doesn't "Chuck" food around. Baby is only little - just 10 months. Baby drops things over the side thinking they'll be there later.

Also if you did BLW you would know that "doing it differently" for one day isn't going to work. The baby won't be spoon fed - just shuts their mouth, because they are used to picking up food and feeding themselves.

Anyway I've had helpful suggestions already about types of food so your post is just a snarky waste of time.

I think there’s some fab suggestions here; I’d also add, be kind to yourself - it’s a three hour journey (which can be exhausting with a tiny one), build in some breaks, etc to your journey, so you don’t get an over tired, fractious, hungry baby. Can you eat outside when you’re there? Might help with the anxiety about food-dropping?

Also, as a first trip to see them, your parents might be emotionally completely overboiled, which for some people just comes across as stressed/critical/etc. Cut them (& you) a bit of extra slack with that in mind. It’s hard to work out new roles (like being a GP) at a bit of a distance in normal times, but extra stressful atm. Hopefully that will settle with time.

Finally, although is sounds bonkers, there is a pleasure to be had in listening and sharing the journey that your mum had in looking after you. I found it hard to know quite how to honour my mum’s experience (she was also a bit challenging), except to listen and recognise that she made the decisions she made for me as a baby from a 1970s perspective; but actually suffused with the same love I had for my new baby - and that she shared for him now. I didn’t need to fight her on it; what I did (BLW, b/feeding and the odd top up with a bit of spoonable stuff) was up to me & baby; she had no power in those decisions and lived 200miles away so couldn’t actually do anything about it anyway. For me, realising she did the best she could when she was a new mum, too & was trying to impart her wisdom was really helpful for dealing with what could have been perceived as criticisms.

My grandmothers views were a whole different ballgame however!!!

Sorry if the last bit sounds a bit wacky. Wisdom of elders, you’ll miss them when they’re gone, etc, etc...☺️

I should probably add my mum died at the beginning of this year, & despite how challenging she could be, I miss her a huge amount.

[quote sunflower811]@BackforGood a massive to you. If you actually read my posts you'd see my baby doesn't "Chuck" food around. Baby is only little - just 10 months. Baby drops things over the side thinking they'll be there later.

Also if you did BLW you would know that "doing it differently" for one day isn't going to work. The baby won't be spoon fed - just shuts their mouth, because they are used to picking up food and feeding themselves.

Anyway I've had helpful suggestions already about types of food so your post is just a snarky waste of time. [/quote]
Most babies are pretty adaptable and would be absolutely fine with occasional spoon feeding or eating differently in different places eg home vs nursery.
If your baby has a strong aversion to spoon feeding they would still likely be able to suck purée or yoghurt from a pouch.