Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Neglecting the child

28 replies

Lapochka77 · 18/04/2021 22:08

OK, here the story. I just would like to know if I'm panicking or its normal. My best friend leaving her 8 years old daughter home alone, because she refuse to go on family walk and they tired to argue. So they left her alone home with no Internet and electricity. No phone or any sort of communication in case of emergency. They went for walk for 1.5 hour walk with their youngest. Older daughter was playing lego all this time. I was in shock. I found it very neglecting!! Plus dangerous, even so you trust your child. Also, I think it's not fair. All family goes out and they leave oldest one behind like this. Am I wrong? I left my 8 years old twice for 15 min and was worried sick. But I had to go out to shop. They went for dog walk. And my friend said she is not worried at all. I wad trying to tell her it's wrong and strange, but she thinks it's fine

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

FortunesFave · 18/04/2021 22:12

You're wrong to panic so dramatically. It's certainly not ideal...why was there no electricity or internet though?

Buzzer3555 · 18/04/2021 22:18

Its not normal to leave such a young child for an h
our and a half. I would be concerned

Original poster

Lapochka77 · 18/04/2021 22:18

So the child doesn't play games on Internet or watch cartoons. Punishment

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

8 year olds Families General parenting

Buzzer3555 · 18/04/2021 22:19

Why no electricity....? Did they turn it off?

Stellaris22 · 18/04/2021 22:19

I understand no internet (turn the wifi off), but no electricity?

OppsUpsSide · 18/04/2021 22:20

Yea that is not a normal way to treat a child

butterrcup · 18/04/2021 22:21

8 is far too young to be left for that long on their own.

Maggiesfarm · 18/04/2021 22:21

@Lapochka77

So the child doesn't play games on Internet or watch cartoons. Punishment

For what was she being punished?

Original poster

Lapochka77 · 18/04/2021 22:23

That she didn't want to go for walk in a forest with all family and dog

OP posts:

AuntyHope · 18/04/2021 22:23

The only odd thing is turning the electricity off/no phone/punishment aspect. Otherwise leaving a sensible child that age to play Lego for 90minutes does not seem like neglect to me.

MissyB1 · 18/04/2021 22:24

They would be in deep shit if anything had gone wrong.

altlife · 18/04/2021 22:25

Sorry to be judgy but I wouldn't be leaving my 8yo old for 15 minutes either. If you need to go to the shop take them with you

Bramblebutter · 18/04/2021 22:26

To me, that's far too long to leave a small child, you're right to be concerned

AwFeebs · 18/04/2021 22:27

Massively irresponsible.

Too young.

Reinventinganna · 18/04/2021 22:30

How far away were they? Not that it really matters if the child couldn’t get hold of them.

The electric and not being able to contact them is far more worrying imo

Saltyslug · 18/04/2021 22:32

I agree it’s irresponsible for such a long period. Depending on the child a shorter period would be fine.

HoldontoOneMoreDay · 18/04/2021 22:35

I think that's a mean 'punishment' as well as being a poor choice in terms of safety. YANBU. Surely with an 8 year old you just say 'tough, get your shoes on, we're going for a walk' and essentially make them come with you?

nimbuscloud · 18/04/2021 22:35

It’s not normal.
Does this happen regularly?

Original poster

Lapochka77 · 18/04/2021 22:43

That was my point! Thank you

OP posts:

getyourfreakon · 18/04/2021 22:47

That length of time is insane to leave an 8 year old alone. I'd have to pass that on as a safeguarding concern best friend or not.

Ajl46 · 18/04/2021 23:07

There is no legal age limit in the UK for leaving a child home alone but the Government guidance does state that children under the age of 12 are rarely mature enough to be left alone for a long period of time: www.gov.uk/law-on-leaving-your-child-home-alone

Bellossom · 18/04/2021 23:08

I'm surprised people thinking it's acceptable except for the electricity. I thought I was fairly laid back and my son is very sensible but no way would I think it suitable to leave him alone yet at 8.
I don't think you're over reacting

SuperCaliFragalistic · 18/04/2021 23:13

I'm trying to give my 9.5 year old more freedoms and responsibilities but I dont think leaving the young child at home as the result of a big argument is wise. She could have decided to try and switch the electric back on and caused injury or decided to do something silly to "spite" the parents. I would normally leave my DD as part of a planned arrangement so they were comfortable with it. However I wouldn't be phoning social services - that feels like an overreaction.

Aussieadopter · 18/04/2021 23:39

If an 8 year old is mature for her age, and knows some basic safety things like how to call emergency services, how to call mum or dad, not to touch the oven, not to open the door to strangers and keep it locked etc they are probably fine. I was fine alone after school for about two hours aged 9 and my sisters 8. The part about turning off the electricity however is really weird.

DramaBanana1 · 19/04/2021 06:57

No it isn’t appropriate to leave a child of 8 alone for that long despite how ‘sensible’ they are. Lack of supervision can be neglect but I would say it depends if there is anything else going on or this was a one off bad decision. You don’t have to report it to social services as such, you can have a conversation in principle (UK) with them where the family you’re talking about can remain anonymous but you can discuss your concern and they can advise.

Flip

1 2