I have a tendency to waffle on but I’ll try and keep this short. It’s a bit more complicated than the title but I didn’t have enough words 😂
I carry a blood clotting disorder. If I have a boy there is 50/50 chance he will have it. It’s not life threatening but requires regular input from haematology. If I have a girl there’s a 50/50 chance she will carry it (and potentially pass on to future son’s or daughters as carriers).
I am currently very fortunate to have a pre-schooler and 7mo boy that do not have it.
I always thought though that I would have a daughter and had a name picked out when pregnant with my eldest son in memory of my Nan.
My husband is happy with two healthy sons. I know that the sex you are born doesn’t determine your interests or the gender you affiliate with. I guess deep down I wanted a mother-daughter relationship that I don’t have with my own mum. It’s not a bad one at all, just not close. When I think of my family in my head I tend to feel like a name is missing.
I thought when my youngest was born I would know whether our family felt complete or not, but I’m still undecided. If the genetic factors weren’t there I would be less inclined to stop at two.
I’m 35 and it takes around a year for us to conceive so I don’t feel that time is on our side to not have a big gap. I’m also breastfeeding so that may also dictate when or if we could ttc again.
The biggest point of this post was to just write it down. Maybe that in itself will help. Thanks for reading.