When does it get easier?

[frustratedwiththepandemic]

I have a just turned 4 and just turned 2 year old. I'm finding it incredibly relentless.

Both have underlying issues and my own health isn't great. They both have a lot of energy to burn and I can't keep. I find the mess overwhelming. The last year hasn't helped of course, wfh without childcare for the majority of it. Even though I work part time, I don't manage to cook, leave the house in a tidy state if we are off for a walk etc. It's like I'm not really benefiting from my time off.

I can't wait until I have a bit more mental space to sit and have lunch in peace for example. I thought when the youngest turned 2 it would get easier but we've had a bad run with health and he's been very clingy.

Wondering if I am depressed but I dont feel my mood itself is low, just that I have so much to do and zero time. I've really slipped with the self care, face masks etc thing of the past! I just manage basics like showering and getting dressed into (ugly but comfy) clothes

[frustratedwiththepandemic]

Thanks all

Don't get me wrong they are great kids and I do love their company but some days are just relentless. Having a much better day today despite being stuck indoors

@radioactiveimagination I've recently been enjoying my Filofax and I am planning to take myself off out every weekend for a coffee no matter what to give me some
Headspace and get myself together. I suffer from fibromyalgia as well so it can be difficult to find the energy but as you say we need to reclaim ourselves a bit.

@user1471604848 and @JadedStrumpet
wow twins! You guys have it incredibly hard. It will get better, generally I found my eldest was much easier after 2 so hoping the youngest wil follow suit..

@weegiepower thanks! Both of mine stopped napping around 23 months old. My youngest is also very difficult and I was hoping it would be slightly easier now that he's 2. I do get glimmers of hope


@Opalfeet both mine have underlying health issues which impacts their sleep and causes them pain and I suffer from fibromyalgia plus some other underlying issues so everyone has constantly said to me it will get easier for you as they grow. I do find my 4 year old much easier especially 1:1 but the 2yo is very clingy and then ofcourse they both suffer daily so it's been difficult to manage it all.

[Opalfeet]

@frustratedwiththepandemic that sounds extremely tough. We all have had a bad cold for two weeks here and that has been tough enough, I think the hardest two weeks of parenting so far.

[Opalfeet]

@frustratedwiththepandemic I imagine it does get easier as they grow, I was responding to another comment (I think) that people don't talk about it being tough past the baby stage.

[Rover83]

I found it easier when my eldest was 2 and I put her in a charity run preschool for 2.5hrs twice a week, which left me a bit of 1 to 1 time with the then 10 month old. I found it even better when the little one turned 2 as the big one got 30 free hours so I sent them both off, to start with the big one did 1 full day and 2 half days but it was enough time to get chores done and have some peace. Now they are 4 and 5, the big one is in reception and the younger one does 3 full days at preschool.

I'm an idiot though and had another one so we have a 6 month old too so it's back to being a bit hectic again

[moralcompass]

Also have a 4 and 2yo, some days are just mad! Thinking of taking a career break to give myself some Breathing space. How is everyone else getting on?