I've just put dd to bed without her dummy...

[Roskva]

And she is yelling her head off. I'm trying to ignore her, but I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing.

How old is she?

My ds didn't want to part with his, he was 3, I waited until xmas and said if you leave it out for santa he will leave you an extra pressie, he did and it worked lol.

My dd2 (3) has been telling me she will give her dummy to Santa. Not sure how she will cope without it tbh. She loves her dummy. But it will be going!

She's 15 months. She hardly has her dummy at all during the day now, and she drops it the minute she goes to sleep. Over the last couple of weeks, she's taken to waking in the night and howling when she can't find it (she usually ends up facing a different direction and at the other end of her cot from where she went to sleep) so I decided to try getting her to sleep without it because I'm fed up with looking for the wretched thing (or another one) several times a night. She used to sleep through, until she had an upset tummy a couple of weeks back, and now the waking seems to be becoming a habit.

leave hundreds of them round the cot so she can find her own if she won't give it up yet.

I've tried putting about half a dozen in. They seem to get kicked out as she thrashes her way round her cot in her sleep .

Anyway, she is now asleep, sans dummy. But I have a feeling she will still wake in the night and howl.

Good luck

Good luck. I have cut down my DD's dummy usuage so that she can only have them when she's in the cot, and has to give them (I put several in the cot as she always knocks some out) to me before I'll get her out of it in the morning or after her nap. I'm DREADING taking them away altogether (she's just over 2)

I only let her get into the dummy habit at around Easter, when she started teething - her first teeth took ages, and she really needed something in her mouth to gum on, and she never got the hang of teething rings. But I would really prefer her to learn to settle herself again, which she used to do quite happily.

good luck Roskva - I did this around April this year, my twins were 2 and half. I was so tense going to bed even though they had fallen asleep after only an hour of screaming - i really worried about how i would get them to settle if they woke in the night.

In the end I had to bite the bullet and bin the dummies so i couldn't be tempted to give in - it took two nights for them to get used to it - well worth it.

She woke up howling 3 times last night. The 3rd time I caved in and put the plug back in.

I will try not to give in tonight. She goes back to sleep much quicker than I do, anyway.

Is her waking up always dummy related?

My dd was a nightmare waker, and we thought it was her dummy. Then we did sleep training and she sleeps through. Nothing to do with dummy at all...........

We took dd's dummy away on her 2nd birthday (yes I'm a cruel mum ). We left it til she was old enough to understand what we were doing. It took a couple of nights of crying and a couple of weeks of her asking for one and then she was over it. If you want to get rid of them then throw them all out and don't give in. They'll soon get the message.

What is sleep training?

It was a really bad night last night - she didn't really settle at all, and was fussing a lot without really waking. She seems to wake enough to grizzle and then stands up in her cot, but if I lie her down she dozes off quite quickly. If I don't go to her and settle her, she howls and then wakes herself up properly. When she has her dummy, she seems to sleep much more soundly.

Maybe it would be better to wait until she's a bit older, but a part of me thinks that's just deferring the problem.

Sleep training is changing their behaviour so they can sleep without you settling them or whatever.

Your dd sounds ripe forit . My dd was a nightmare for 6 months until we sorted her. We did this:

Go in, lie her back down pat her and say night night or whatever,no eye contact, walk straight out. Go straight back in, lie her back down, etc etc etc. She will cry, but she is never left to cry. Only stop going in when she stops crying. If she starts again, repeat until she calms down again.

We had to do this for 3 nights until her behaviour changed. After 2 weeks she was going through, and now sleeps much better in the day as well.

Believe me, no one could have been more desperate than me, I posted millions of pleas for help on here. We were having to sit with her, pat her etc all night, and then she would still be awake and screaming for about 2 or 3 hours every night.

The whole house was exhausted, and now life is great again Try not to give in, it takes abut 2 or 3 weeks to work, but she WILL respond HONESTLY! After months of sitting by her when she went to sleep, never daring to leave the room in case she started she now waves night night to use, and rolls over and goes to sleep

No horrible controlled crying or leaving her to cry, although as I said she will cry.

Am an absolute zealot about this method, it changed all our lives

I know all about that grizzling/standing up in cot, immediate response needed or meltdown...Oh..yes....could write books on it, and dummy chucking

We, also leave a load of dummies at the bottom of the cot on a chest so she can reach them.

Fizzbuzz, that sleep training sounds excellent! My DD2 is 1 year old next week and won't sleep in her cot, she sleeps in between my DH and I. She needs a bottle to get to sleep, plus pulls at my hair as a comforter (comfort for her, not for me!). I actually wish she would use a dummy!
But everybody was suggesting I just put her in the cot and let her cry! I've tried doing that a few times, but feel it's just too cruel and always cave in. What age is this "sleep training" best to start at?

Fizzbuzz, is there an age for this method? Is 8.5 months too young? I assumed he wanted his dummy but would love it if it was something i could help him with. what's your mental preparation like before you start?

Aaargh, I'm not really the expert, it is all on the baby whisperer website. However I will try.

Mental preparation....well after 6 months off hell, dp decided at3.00am one morning he had just had enough. He just laid her down every time she stood up, and left the room, and then went straight back in etc etc. Some baies do it fast, but if they are determined and stubborn then it can take longer. (dd is very determined and stubborn-hence 3 weeks)
It is no more tiring than been up every night anyway. It is just sticking it out thatt is hard, wondering if it is ever going to work...But...it really does.

Re ages: 8.5 months is old enough, but if he doesn't stand up, then you have to do Pick up/put down. ie when he cries pick him up, as soon as he stops lay him down. If he starts crying on the way down lift him back up again. If he arches his back put him straight down. The idea is to associate you with comfort and bed with quiet time. When you put him down, pat him and say night night, and then pick him staright back up if he is crying. Repaet until they stop...it can take quite a long time. Don't do leaving room thing until he is a bit more settled as that is really aimed at toddlers, but you could try it, as long as you can go back in and comfort him straight away. I think the longest I let dd cry for was 30 seconds, and that nearly broke me

1 year old...you will need to sleep in her room with her at first as she is used to you being there. To just leave her in her cot when she is used to you would be quite difficult I think. You can still do the lying her back down at first though. We had to start off in dd's room as she was so used to us being there, but by third night had escaped and we were just walking in and out lying her back down every time, no eye contact remember. You just have to adjust it according to you really. You can always sneak back out when she finally falls asleep which is what we did. We had to wean her off us being there at first, but as I said by the third night we were out of her room

Hope all this helps...dd slept fantastically last nigh, whereas I for some reason was awake all night..perhaps I need some sleep training

And whatever method you choose, stick to it. You will probably have slip ups, we did when we were really tired, but don't beat yourself up about it, just carry on as you were

I just gave it a whirl and within 15 mins he was asleep. He didn't really cry from distress, just had that calling out sound which was good because it didn't upset us!I wonder if i'll have the guts to do it when he wakes during the night.. I'm assuming the point is to make them know we're here if they need us but they can sleep by themselves.

I' going to try it. I gave her a dummy last night as she has got my yucky cold and stuffed up nose, but actually as she has trouble sucking the dummy with a stuffy nose, maybe now is a good time to get rid of the dummy.

We went cold turkey on the dummy at 6mo, as it was interfering with DD's sleep. We had 3 days when she grizzled for around 30mins at sleep times. After 3 days she'd forgotten it. It was hard, but worth it. good luck !